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emo
Well, I'm not allowed to go outside anymore if it's not school activity or a family thing...I guess I'm sort of grounded? This is the first time that I got grounded...I'm not even sure if I'm grounded xp
It all started last saturday, 11-11-'06...the next day, sunday, was one of my friend's birthday. But since not much of us can attend if it's on a sunday, especially since it was an early dinner party thing, she invited us during saturday.
things were fine 'til I found out we we're going to commute (public transportation) all the way there from one of my other friend's house. So...yeah, we commuted there. It was all good 'til the end of the party, when we go back to the house we came from, my mom saw me...she found out we only used public transport and got mad...she said I won't be allowed to go out anymore...
it was pretty bad, since next week (which is tomorrow, 11-18-'06), I was supposed to go to this anime convention...I asked permission yesterday from my mom and surprise, surprise...she said no... stare gonk crying
I love her and all, but how could she make me miss what could've been wonderful events in my life. So me taking out my phone during on public rides was stupid, but did I look cold and see through when I got back? Nope! ...I understand and all that, but the innoncent child in me screams for justice I very well deserve. But I got to hold back my tongue...
I'm 14 damnit! Doesn't she think that it's about time I learned to travel by public transpo? I mean, just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I'm ditzy and have no common sense! I mean, I rarely go out on my own...actually, I've never got out on my own damnit! scream I don't even know the names of the road, where which vechile travels to and other s**t... gonk
She should really reconsider and be more understanding of her daughter's thoughts and feelings. I understand her mother instinct better than some may think for a fourteen year old. But I know I could be more understanding when it comes to situations like such.
What's the use of being seemingly physically safe, well, alive and supposedly happy outside, when I'm being broken and torn by the feeling of regret of not being to voice myself out, the momentary feeling of being unloved and loneliness from inside out?
I try to be optimistic. I really do. But no matter what, or how mature I look at this situation, no matter how mature my explanations and thoughts and resolves are, I'm a child inside, being held from how happy life's supposed to be...
making no comment so goes emo in the corner,
niu shen
emo emo emo
 niu shen · Fri Nov 17, 2006 @ 12:22pm · 0 Comments |
