im hanging in this horrible balance... you know what it's like, when your interested in a guy, and he's interested in you, but neither of you have done anything yet? and u sorta hang in a balance?
well, mine's a little different i'm hanging in the balance of ending my relationship with my bf. none of my friends know this, so i know it's gonna be a shock... specially to crazy875 when she reads this. but yeah.
I'm a christian. Ibelieve in jesus christ, that he came to earth and died for our sins, and that he came back to life and went to heaven to sit at god's right hand. My boyfriend doesn't. Now, it says in the bible that christians shouldn't date/marry non christians. i thought that was dumb... ya know? you love someone so much that you wouldn't dream of doing anything but being with them. i thought me and dan could get through that.
but now i see differently. i understand why it's reccomended like that. Dan doesn't understand me. what i believe, and why i do. he doesn't understand that i want my partner and i to be in a relationship together with god watching over us. i want to lay in bed at night and pray with my husband, and feel that bond between us which reaches out to the lord. i guess not many of you would understand that... but yeah. it's something special, that makes a marriage feel... complete. And it's something i want so eagerly. I couldn't marry someone without that bond... i know i'd miss out on so much and i don't want to.
Anyway. dan doesn't want to understand. he doesnt want to believe that there is a god. let alone one that loves us. he doesn't understand why i'd want to put my lord over my life, and my boyfriend. And while i love him. so very damn much... i can't fully love him until he knows me... and my lord, for who we are.
Lady Etak · Mon Dec 04, 2006 @ 09:27am · 1 Comments |