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	the life we hold before us, is more important then the sorrows we have had in the past "with the limited resources we have on this planet, we should not be fighting...but this will continue and humanity is lost. But no matter what ill fate deals us, if we are alive we will have hope"


i have finally got to talk on aim because i had no idea what the big thing was about (yes i have been on for a while but i only had the buddy list up) so i started talking to people i don't know and found i say the stupidest things ever..... i am a dork no way around it and no point looking past it..... i don't think before i talk (but you all know that), i insult people with out knowing i do ...... my spelling and grammer sucks (you all know that to), i do not deserve half of the things i have and it seams i always try to distroy what i do have, my family does not have a lot of money but i eat thousands of things a day and waste power, i have a wonderful girl friend and i insult her religion (even though i did not mean to and i am sorry if i hurt her feelings), i have people trying to help me through life and school and what do i do, i do not lisen to them and i do nothing but be lazy after i reflected on this all week end i have come to a conclusion that you people are very wierd to still even look at me i'm pathetic and right know no one can pull me out of this not even McKay because of all the things i say the things i mess up , i still do not understand life , i talk (not often) about science and i sound semi-smart but that lasts like what two mins... than i make a stupid joke that i mess up or make a perverted joke that seams to get even more pointless. my life is going nowhere, i am going nowhere the thing i wanted to major in or do when i graduate has now become nothing i don't understand it my life seamed to be getting better from my hell hole childhood because of the friends and my girlfriend, but you know what i am the idiot of the group that only commandes respect by violance and i see this now, this book worm that has never lived life never realy saw what life has in store is now broken his brain dust, after all of my talk about not bashing your self i think to my self how stupid pathetic and moronic i am, i do not take hints after saying my friend josh does not take hints, i do not thank my girlfriend for all of the things that she has done for me she never will know exactly what she has done to help. my friends are good people yes even pat, they are respectful people but i still make fun of them i was asked once why was i wearing a slip knot shirt i do not look some one that is in to that... i asked them what they meant they said that i have a happy go lucky life ,it looks like i have not seen anything bad in my life, i did not look like someone that would be into that i had no answer to that other than looks can be diseving(the stupist qoute ever) because i just noticed that i bottle up my problems my feelings and put a happy face on i am not saying these things for anyone to be sad for me, i am not saying this so you think differently of me (in fact i don't want that i want you to know i understand what i have done and you forget about this) i am saying this because this ******** house blows and it seams when i'm alone in it all of my feels come out, and i have no control over my hands head or heart i am just the layers of skin nothing more i am not saying that i have the most problems and i am not trying to top someone life(for once) in english we were told to speak what we were thinking and i wrote nothing close to what i was thinking, because writing this down for people to see did not appeal to me........but that does not matter any more............................................................... ....................................................................... ................................. ....................................................................... ....................................................................... ................................ ..................................................................... ....................................................................... ...................................... i am done break down over...... when you people see me mon. i will not have a trace of anything i just said in my eyes(the eyes are the windows of you soul) this post was not made to be typed by anyones comments but after a while it built up and i could not hold it, now thanks to a very real mental slap in the face i realize what i have done...and i am going to improve if i don't then someone realy do slap me up side the head ......thinks smiles a litte this post did not happen it is just a figment of your imagination waves his hand infront of his face (really in this modern world, guys are sensitive and this post proves it.. even if they are stupid idiots almost all the time) goodbye! Affliction of the mind · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 06:20pm · 9 Comments


Affliction of the mind Community Member «Prev \| Next» Archive \| Home [01/04/09 10:04am] [08/18/08 08:35pm] [08/15/08 05:04pm] [07/19/08 04:38am] [05/12/08 09:01pm] [05/07/08 03:11am] [05/01/08 03:30am] [04/14/08 04:13pm] [03/10/08 04:30am] [02/27/08 04:46am]

	User Comments: [9]
	User Comments: [9]


	Lemme guess.... Cameron yelled at you for the shirt? He told me off because I couldn't remember 2 song names. I flipped him off, and was ready to shove a boot up his a. Wait, wait, wait- You're pathetic?!?! That makes me... Like.... Uber-pathetic, as much as I hate that term. Tell me, how is my life better than yours? Offline Teh Joshers** · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 06:35pm


	lets see i'm poor, my family is so ****** up if a perfessinal interviewed us we will become science experiments and i seam to always take to heart every thing people say good and mostly bad and no it was not Cameron who said that Offline Affliction of the mind** · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 07:24pm


	Quote: i am a dork no way around it and no point looking past it..... i don't think before i talk (but you all know that), i insult people with out knowing i do No, you're not...you're one of the least dorkiest people i know. Offline KK.trin · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 08:11pm


	thank you....wow that journal i wrote really does not sound like me but i'm to lazy to delete it so i quess it's just going to stay their Offline Affliction of the mind · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 08:17pm


	Quote: lets see i'm poor, my family is so ****** up if a perfessinal interviewed us we will become science experiments and i seam to always take to heart every thing people say good and mostly bad Stack that up against st income, no grandparents, 1 less uncle, a lesbian aunt (not that it worries me), 8 deaths in less than 2 years, 2 pet deaths in less than 1 year, st edumacation, restrictive parents (though I hate admitting it), can't get a girlfreind, all of 15 freinds, known as a dweeb, and if I had less money, the government would declare me a prostitute (finally) and kill me. Offline Teh Joshers** · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 09:58pm


	oh, just shut up for once josh. really. Offline Indigo_rose_daela · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 10:44pm


	wow your aunt a lesbian thats got to hurt...now try an abusive alcholic father, a lesbian sister that thinks if she lives with a***e daddy she will get what she wants so she is saying my mother is abussive and horrible,etc, etc., parent so she can live with the alcholis sexual abuser oh and you think strict parents are bad try having one that is always home that always knows were you are and with whom, deaths..well you got me their because i don't care about the rest of my family they all live in florida and i have a girlfriend, but hay why are we trying to top one another all of our lives suck in their own special way thay totaly blow,we are teens almost everything sucks Offline Affliction of the mind** · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 11:00pm


	True, true. but my mom was home for TWO MONTHS without leaving home. Fun? Ha! And, although it seems true, I must say you fit into the sterotype of "ah I'm a teen feel bad for me" group. Offline Teh Joshers · Community Member · Sun Apr 03, 2005 @ 11:26pm


	u kidding? we all do. thats not really a stereotype. almost evey teen is like that in case you havent noticed. I hate my life too i just dont go on and on about it ( for the most part) or try to top other people's misery, i just strangle myself. Offline Indigo_rose_daela · Community Member · Tue Apr 05, 2005 @ 11:19pm

	User Comments: [9]
	User Comments: [9]

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