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MY friends,

I wish for once.
You'd understand
What it is like to walk
In ones shoes

See everything from my point of veiw.
The misery one has suffered.
And rarely anyone there for her.

Thoughts of Suicide passed my mind once.
But back then, my friends stopped me.
And now, it's someone special to me
Who is now my reason to live.

I hide behind a mask
A mask of Happyness
To hide my misery
I never need your sympathy

You guys never see things
From my point of veiw.

I suffer a lot.
I don't have,
The 'ideal' life.

I almost lost my Grandpa
My Grandma, drinks.
My mom is rarely around
My dad I rarely see now.

I have suffered more then all you know.
I broke down.
None of you were there to help.
What if I was to cut my wrists open?

Would you actully care then?

Would tears, show you how much I have suffered?
How much has happened to me?

If not that?
What would?

I'm not 'Attention Seeking'
As my one friend said.
I just like to show my true side
Once and a while.

It's hard hiding behind a mask
Of Happyness.
When no one cares.
When you have no friend who would stand by your side.

What would it take, to just show you?
To show you, what i've been through?
Like I said.
I do not have, the perfect life, that it seems like.

You guys don't even listen to me.
I listen to you.
For god sake.
Are you guys even really my friends.

How are you guys going to feel when i'm gone?
Would you even come to see me?
Or am I not that good of friend
For such a thing.

Maybe once.
You guys, realise all this.
MY pain and Suffering.
Maybe i'll come back to you guys.

But for now.
I will not hang around with you.
I have no reason to.
When one like me, only hides behind a mask of happyness.