This is my entry to just release all I have to say about guys.. yes I said guys
First off you have to understand that because I go to an all girls school and almost all the guys where I live are freakin pussies I am extreemly horny. O.k. I said it. Now to explain a little:
A. The guys where I live don't have the guts to make the first move. They can't even perform the follow up if the girl does happen to make the first move. What the hell is so hard about asking someone for their number. I think it is flattering when a guy talks to you cause he likes how you look. It's even better if he stays to talk. That gets big macho points. I take pride in how I look, why shouldn't I? I think my guy should notice that I look sexy for him. Hell yes I am thinking that far.
....Onto my next issue.....
B. I am extreemly horny. Don't get me wrong. I won't go have sex but I lust for men. When I drive i look into cars for guys. Yes, I desperately need some guy attention. Espeically since I never get any during school season. I really want to have a boyfriend who wants me. It seems like all the guys I've been with seroiusly haven't cared about me. It gets to you. I want a guy to want me more than I want him at times. It's not fair to have it one sided.
.......
So to conclude, I think I might do something rash in the future if I don't get any attention from any of the male sex here anytime soon. I mean during the school time I can deal cause I make jokes with the girls. That is satisfying because it's funny and embarrassin to me. Sure I may not show it but I ma hella timid yet really forceful on the subject of romance. It is what I centered my whole childhood on. I know, sad isn't it. Yea I used to want to be a whore so that I would be loved. I didn't care if it was just cause of my body. I just wanted to be loved. Twisted? maybe but I love how I've turned out. I think highly of myself. Though, I still wonder if I will end up as a whore to settle my own dreams. Yes, one solution to this problem is cybering. I feel like a goddess cause I hold the power.
Sorry, I know this is really long entry. I just need this. I thought all of you that didn't know this should know who you are associating with. Yes, I am punk. Yes, I used to pretend my barbies were having sex. Yes, I am suicidal. Yes, I can drive. And finally, I do care about my friends above all else. Why else would I bike in the night to a friend in need? Why else would I yell at a boyfriend that is a complete stranger to me? Why else wouldn't I give a s**t what anybody else thinks of me? Cause they are everything to me. They are my second chance. They are the pride and joy. They are love in action. They are joy and hapinness and the perfect balance of good and bad. They are worth everything and much more.
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Am I Broken or Just Different?
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