Dumb, huh? Everything is going along fine, and then you do something dumb and your happy little world crumbles to dust. Even though it shouldn't.
I'm such an idiot. I can't believe myself. I honestly thought I would be able to give someone something who hates me, and not have any consequences. Instead I just made myself look like a fool, and now he hates me. Now he thinks I want to be friends with him. I DON'T. I just freakin gave him art. I've drawn like, 20 freebies for practice in the past two weeks, and most of those people I drew weren't my friends at all. I just liked his avi and I wanted to draw it. And now he's upset, because I gave him art.
How would you feel? I don't know, I'm undoubtedly overreacting, and being a drama queen just like Vash thinks I am. But I tend to have strong emotions about everything I deal with. How would you react if you gave someone something you made, and instead of them just accepting it, they hated you for it? I feel completely, and utterly, humiliated. And humiliation is something I find very hard to deal with.
I just want to climb to the top of this mountain and scream. And then if I don't feel better after that, I'm going to have to make myself turn around before I give into the temptation to jump off it. If it weren't winter I'd probably go and kill a few rabbits. But that wouldn't even get all my anger and frustration out.
I wish my emotions weren't so damn vulnerable... I hate myself for that weakness. What I would give to just not be able to feel sometimes. You don't even know. My emotions are undoubtedly going to be my undoing.
Well... I guess I gotta go. I'll be back another time.
I'm such an idiot. I can't believe myself. I honestly thought I would be able to give someone something who hates me, and not have any consequences. Instead I just made myself look like a fool, and now he hates me. Now he thinks I want to be friends with him. I DON'T. I just freakin gave him art. I've drawn like, 20 freebies for practice in the past two weeks, and most of those people I drew weren't my friends at all. I just liked his avi and I wanted to draw it. And now he's upset, because I gave him art.
How would you feel? I don't know, I'm undoubtedly overreacting, and being a drama queen just like Vash thinks I am. But I tend to have strong emotions about everything I deal with. How would you react if you gave someone something you made, and instead of them just accepting it, they hated you for it? I feel completely, and utterly, humiliated. And humiliation is something I find very hard to deal with.
I just want to climb to the top of this mountain and scream. And then if I don't feel better after that, I'm going to have to make myself turn around before I give into the temptation to jump off it. If it weren't winter I'd probably go and kill a few rabbits. But that wouldn't even get all my anger and frustration out.
I wish my emotions weren't so damn vulnerable... I hate myself for that weakness. What I would give to just not be able to feel sometimes. You don't even know. My emotions are undoubtedly going to be my undoing.
Well... I guess I gotta go. I'll be back another time.
