Do you ever wonder why we continue on a course of action knowing whats ahead? Even when we know that the current course is going to lead to alot of anguish and pain.
Sometimes I get such a fire inside me to change my life for the better. Really doing those things I know I should do yet, find them so hard to do or I'm just plain lazy and do not do them.
Human nature or fear? Which holds me back?
On the one hand human nature is quite often lazy, procrastinating and selfish, to a larger or smaller degree depending on the person. Then on the other hand theres fear that can stagnate a persons growth and make them never become brave enough to do the all the things that come to mind.
While sometimes I think it's a mixture of these in my own life, right now I feel strongly that it's just plain laziness. That there is not as much fear as there is just a major part of me thats given up in the face of so much stress over the past four years. And I've done this regardless of whats to come.
I sometimes picture things as they will be when things start falling apart in society. I picture myself and I wonder, will I have what it takes to make the right decisions then? In the face of pressure beyond anything I've known so far, will I make the right decisions to stand for what I say with my lips that I believe in completely?
I can see the trains that are approaching each other ahead. But will I survive the wreck, or be lost in it?
 Irahatam · Wed Jan 16, 2008 @ 08:35am · 0 Comments |
