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Well of course it's back! Of course it just had to come back with my depression. I haven't had insomnia in over a year and I don't know why it's back with me now. I guess it's from the stress I've been feeling lately. I mean Zak's going to be gone for five days and I'm going to be left at home the entire time, which everyone who knows me knows I hate being at home. I get out as much as I can and usually it's to see Zak.

Tonight I think I saw pure love. I saw it from Zak and I seriously felt it engulf me and it made me so happy inside and it's given me the motavation I need. I've got back the feeling of wanting to help myself now and it's great.

Zak, I love you. I'm not just saying this. Tonight all our feelings were proved. I've never loved anyone like I love you. Never anyone I've ever met in anyway. I didn't even know it was possible to hold so much love for someone but you've proved me wrong. I know you love me back and I love hearing your say it and prove it and everything. I'm so glad that you're mine and I never want to let you go...I want to keep you because you make me feel important and because I think if I lost you my heart would disappear because of all the love I hold for you.

I'm going to go thank brittainny now for freaking out that day and making me ask you out because it was the best desicion I've ever made! Thank you for not answering her and making me do it! I love you so much!