You k n o w you're ASIAN when...
Your parents still tried to get you into places half-price saying you were 12 when you were really 15
You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later they're still lecturing
You have a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry
Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from
Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends' kids
You've had to sit through karaoke videos with scantily clad, ugly Asian women attempting to dance and walk around a temple, forest, or library
Your parents say, "Don't forget your heritage"
You've learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom
You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even put in hot dogs
Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever-so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi, etc..
Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin
Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher
At least one family member wears black wire/plastic frame glasses
Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, "In Korea (or other native country), we studied even more."
Your parents expect you'll be best friends with any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian
Your parents' vocabulary is filled with "ai-yahs, and Wah's"
You like $1.75 movies
You like $1.50 movies even more
Your parents insist you marry within your race
"You want a stereo?! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!!"
People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate
You have to call just about all your parent's friends "Auntie and Uncle"
You have 12+ aunts and uncles
Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread and say "Eat anyway. It's still good."
The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses. Thick glasses.
You will most likely be taller than your parents
You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you don't
When going to other people's houses, you always have to bring a gift
Your family owns a tennis racket, golf clubs, or both
Your family always cheers for the Asian athlete on TV (i.e. Michael Chan)
You have rocks, sticks, leaves, and strange-smelling, unknown substances in your pantry for use as medicine
You own a rice cooker or two
You buy soy sauce by the gallon
Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head
Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going
Your parents buy you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come.
