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of journal entrys.

and i have probably only said two things that really anyone has either

A. paid any attention too
or
B. cared a bit about.


but i realize this. i would like to say however. that in my last year of highschool i will list my regrets.

i have not done as well as i wish i could have
i did not reach my potential
i did not stand up to people sooner
i did not start learning things and doing things i wanted to

i let love/lust get the better of me even though im wierd when it comes to that issue

i see now that even though there is always something you have done wrong there is a million things that you have done right;

every day there are tiny things that you dont even remember doing that you did right.

apparantly i really helped some random girl in the hall one day while walking back to class, just by asking her if she was ok. can such small things that we dont even consciously do or remember really mean that much to other people.

i have to say yes.

and thats why im glad i can play guitar now. i want to convey emotion regardless of whether it be anger and malice, or love and happiness. i do find that when i make music, it is usually kind of slow. but i tend to think it gives off a happy vibe. i love music and i always will. nothing will ever take that from me. NOTHING.




and so thats what i have come to realize in these last years and time as a high schooler.