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gwah!!! stare crying stare cry stare yet again... reality has thwarted my life's little pleasures... *sigh* At times it seems futile... all we do is conform to what everyone considers to be appropriate.. or at least I have, in hopes of winning trust and favor and yet time after time, the smallest of requests are obliterated with an uncompromising denial. Why is it.. I behave when I get denied the littlest of things that I ask for, when if I choose to rebel I can take what I want.... why don't we just take what we want... I pursue the only thing i want aggressively... but... there are some things I cannot change... time is thine enemy... and I must endure until it is the time when they are no longer an obstacle....