THE JACKSON TROOPERS PART VIII
Opening:
Nicole was walking through Harford Tech hallways playing her DS.
Fat Teacher: YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYING THAT! GIMME! SO I CAN EAT----Er…CONSFICATE IT!
Nicole ran out of the school to get far away and jumped by accident to hit one of them Mario blocks.
Nicole: WHAT THE?
Block: Oooooohhhhh…That felt good!
A hamburger dropped out and Nicole smiled. She hit it again and a Nintendo Wii came out. She hit it again and a straight A report card came out. She hit it again and Autumn fell from the sky and landed flat on her face. A grin then came on Nicole’s face.
Autumn: OH! HOW COME MESA DIDN’T GET SCREEM TIME LAST JOURNAL? AND WHAT WAS WITH THE SUDDEN CHANGE OF COMEDY TO ACTION?! AND HOW COME-
Nicole started to trample Autumn back and forth while laughing hysterically.
Nicole(like Mario): YEAH! HA HA HA!
Autumn: Ouch! Stop!
Nicole: Ok…
Autumn: Really?
Nicole: Nope.
BOOT TO THE FACE!
BAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!
Autumn: Mother flucker!!!!
Nicole: And now more trampling!
*trampling continues*
iDarkness: Get serious guys and stop with the violence! It never solves anything. Anyway, the Jackson Troopers were captured by what was left of the Children Warlords cronies. And since Mike writes this story, we’ve got to save them! So lets go be heroes!
Autumn: And how exactly are we supposed to do that? We have no Opium powers at ALL.
Nicole: And she’s Autumn! That’s a disadvantage right there!
Autumn: What’s that?
Nicole: I said “she’s-
Autumn: Shut the fluck up.
Nicole:
iDarkness: Sorry you had to get whored by Autumn just now but we’ve got a job to do!
Autumn: We have no training!
Nicole: Or weapons!
iDarkness: We got screen time and brains and that’s all we really need. Oh…And my awesome motorcycle.
iDarkness pressed a button on a switch and all of a sudden the motorcycle from Pokemon Colossuem came along except it was all black and near the handlebars were buttons and commands and weapons. Guns were to the side of the motorcycle along with iDarkness’s name on the side, nicely printed in.
REAL STORY:
Hip Hop Harry: So um….Sagwa…..What have you’ve been doing today?
Sagwa: Well….meow meow meow MEOW so when he meowed meow meow I just had to meow and meow and that was the meow of the meow meowing story.
Hip Hop Harry: Yeah me too.
Sagwa, Hip Hop Harry, and the rest of the underlings were guarding a high security metal prison hidden inside a poisonous fog. They were guarding the Jackson Troopers who were to be executed. Hip Hop and Sagwa were outside the prison with their guns perked up, waiting for some fool to come near.
???(far away): Do you know what you’re doing?
???: Of course I do! Now but the darn mask on already!
Hip Hop: HOLY DAMN!!! I didn’t think someone would actually come!
…………
…………
And that’s what we would say if we were actually attacked.
Sagwa(taking notes): Hmmmmmmm…..But what if that actually happened sir?
Hip Hop Harry: That chance is like Mike dating Megan McSwain , bud.
First of all it can’t happen because OMG WHAT THE IN THE NAME OF FLUCK IS THAT?! RUN SAGWA! RUN!
Sagwa ran for cover and hit her head against the wall and collapsed.
Hip Hop Harry: AH HAH! DAMN GIRL! You should’ve seen your face! It was like-
The sound of a motor was heard which increased in sound every millisecond. A small light had also started to gradually build up. Out of the poisonous gas, a motorcycle busted through with one person riding it, another holding the rider’s back to stay on, and another tied to a rope on the end of the bike who was being dragged along the ground. All of these figures in black clothing all had gas masks on.
Hip Hop Harry: What the…..
The motorcycle zoomed past like a rocket and did a drive by, with the rider using one hand to shoot Hip Hop Harry in the head and the other to steer. As Hip Hop Harry’s dead body crashed to the ground, it accidentally cut off the rope that connected the last person to the motorcycle. Because of the disconnection, that same person flew in the air and landed hard on her butt. At that time, her mask came off. The rider and the person behind him jumped off the motorcycle as he let it hit the opening door.
Autumn: Fluck you all!
Sagwa: Holy crap you killed him with a darkness cap! I didn’t think you would actually use those!!! Wait…Then you three must be…..
…..
I know what you’re here for and you’re not going to get it!
Sagwa jogged over to a button label “emergency” and slammed on it.
Sagwa: Now you’ll never get it! *retarded laugh*
Autumn: Wowswers. Leave it to the retarded cat.
Nicole(taking her mask off): I’ve got this lil rat. NICOLE POWNING KICK!
Nicole gave a kick that sent Sagwa into the poisonous gas. Sagwa quickly got out breathing hard.
Sawga: Great! Now I’m about die!
Nicole: We’re not done yet!
SUMMONING!
Nicole used the little of her Opium to summon Christopher Schott.
iDarkness: The fluck you do that for? We needed to save our Opium for emergencies in case something in the plan went wrong!
Nicole: But lookie here! Look at what Chris is doing!
Chris started hug Sawga really tight making it hard to breathe while Sawga tried desperately to get away!
Chris: I LOVE YOU KITTY! I LUV YOU! YES I DO! I’MA GONNA CALL YOU SNICKERS! I LOVE YOU SNICKERS!
Nicole: Muhhahahahahaha! That’s hilarious! HA HA HA HA Ha, ha, ha……….
……..
…….
Oh.
Nicole pasted out for using too much of her Opium.
iDarkness(placing Nicole on his shoulders): Lets go guys!
Autumn: AWESOMENESS! I GET ALL THE SCREEN TIME! Letsa go save people!
The background charcters then -
Autumn: Excuse me!
Fine! The very important characters! More like snooty boo-
Autumn: EY!
Narrator Mike(like Happy Feet): Don’t be so snooty, booty!
iDarkness with Nicole on his back and Autumn made their way through the base, dodging all the traps that had been prepared especially for them. iDarkness did all the work because Autumn was practically useless. It wasn’t till one trap that Autumn proved her worthlessness
Autumn: SHUT UP! I’M USEFUL!
Not looking where she was looking, Autumn tripped over a laser which slighty burned her leg. Another laser from above slowly tried to permanently destroy Autumn.
iDarkness: Get out of the way! Remember what I taught you!
Autumn stayed put where she was grabbing her leg and doing that one fake hurt scene from family guy.
Autumn: Shhhhhh……….
AH!
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………….
AH!
iDarkness: Got dammit Ta-Ta!
Autumn: Not my damn name.
iDarkness: Okay I’m s-
……
(thinking to himself): If mesa can get her pissed enough, we can get out of here!
(speaking): YO TA-TA! I HEAR YOU’RE GOING OUT WITH MICHAEL!
Autumn: I’m not! Shut it!
iDarkness: How come you get the most screen time Everlasting Ta-Ta?!
Autumn: Cause I’m awesome!
iDarkness: I’m mad you answered to that name. Losin’ your touch Ta-Ta?
Autumn: AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHH!
iDarkness: OH! He he….I get why you got the screen time!
……..
So the sex was good then?
Autumn got so pissed that she got up and started to chase iDarkness who was leading her to the exit of the trap.
iDarkness: Come on Autumn! If you wanna get to me you gotta work faster!
…..
HA! Isn’t that what Mike said to you last night?!
Autumn caught up to iDarkness and punched him hard in the face with an Opium charged fist which pushed him and Nicole through the exit just as the beam crashed down where they were just previously were.
iDarkness: SWEET AUTUMN! YOU’RE AWESOME! Sorry for the jokes earlier. They were too much. And whats more, you’ve finally unlocked your Opium-
……
……
Autumn?
……
Hello?
…..
Ah fluck my life.
Autumn: X X
-
Autumn had passed out and iDarkness had to carry both her and Nicole. Right when he was ready to drop dead, a ominous voice came over the base.
???(robotic woman voice): TIME FOR TELETUBBIES.
…….
TIME FOR TELETUBBIES.
….
TIME FOR TELETUBBIES.
On a screen above, fat creatures rolled out of a house.
Girly Voice: (as a purple fat creature rolled out) PINKY DINKY!!!!
(as a green fat creature rolled out): DIPSIE!
(yellow one) LA-LA!
(red one): POE!
~TELETUBBIES!~
~TELETUBBIES~
iDarkness(to the same tune): ~SHUT THE FLUCK UP!~
iDarkness shot a darkness cap at the screen destroying it.
Pinky Dinkie: That wasn’t nice!
iDarkness: The world ain’t nice! Right Real life Autumn?
The real Autumn reading the story: DAMN STRAIGHT.
Poe: Well….We’re going to do something not so nice now!
Nicole(waking up): Put some base in your voice before you do that. You sound like J.C. for crying out loud!
J.C.: Hey! Not fair! This is my first appearance!
Nicole(shooting him): Whoops. Sorry dude. We cool……..
Dipsie: Oooooooooooooooo….That not nice! But we go something that is….
All the Teletubbies laughed as Autumn awakened.
Autumn: What have you ADORABLE FLUFFY guys got planning?
La-La: From here on end, y’all have to make a choice. Once you enter the next hallway, you will see a fork in a road each road leading miles away from the other. The road to the right leads to Mike. The other leads to the rest of the Jackson Troopers. All are tied by a rope that sucks away Opium and blood each minute. If you cannot make it in time, their bodies will be sucked clean of EVERYTHING. As we speak they get weaker. You have THIS much time.
iDarkness: ……
……
You’re a wordy little b*****d aren’t you?
One of the Teletubbies gave the peace sign.
Nicole: 2 hours?! You serious? It took us 5 just to get to where we are now!
Teletubbies: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Good Luck!
The whole base shook as iDarkness tackled Autumn out of the way of an explosion.
Autumn: WHAT THE FLUCK, BOY?!
Teletubbies: Did we mention that if you fail to get there in time, a bomb will set off?
Autumn: Oh…Y’all suck! :angry:
Poe: We’re not the ones who passed out trying to learn their powers!
Autumn: Tu’che
So how are we gonna make it in time?
iDarkness: Autumn! You go for Mike and me and Nicole will go for the others!
Pinky Dinky: Each second that goes by, a mini explosion will occur that can possibly kill you or block off your path. Each 10 seconds the magnitude and intensity of the explosions will increase tenfold.
Dipsie: Hehehehehe….Remember. You’ve got 2 to find them. Also, the entire base will shake when your time is halfway over.
Teletubbies: Your time begins…..NOW!
At that same moment, iDarkness summoned his motorcycle as Nikky jumped on it again. The two sped off in the other direction as Autumn had to run. Along the way she beautifully got pass all the obstacles because of her immense training. While she was doing well, she came across the cast of Bunnytown, who were still alive.
Bunnies:~WE’RE MAKIN’ MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSIC!~
~IN BUNNYTOWN!~
The bunnies, while singing, threw knives at Autumn the same time that the ceiling above almost came crashing down on her. If Autumn jumped over the ceiling that was about to crush her, she would face the killing knives and if she continued running she would also die. It was a no win suitation until she figured out the solution. She jumped BELOW the crushing pillar as the knives missed. At the same time, the timely explosion happened right where Autumn and the pillar were. They all gave high fives presuming she was dead. All of a sudden they all heard a drilling sound. Autumn burst from underground and used her Opium to extend her kick that sent the cast of Bunnytown into the NEXT timely explosion. For those of you who don’t understand, Autumn jumped under the pillar first. While under the pillar, she was under a lot of gravity. With all that gravity pushing her down, she used her feet to propel off the flying pillar further DOWN. With gravity and her own weight pushing her down, Autumn was like a bullet. However, she still had to worry about hitting the ground. Using her small amount of Opium, she focused it into her fingers and began to spin downward in a spiral position. This made her a mini drill letting her dig a whole underground to escape. Since the falling pillar concealed the hole Autumn had done just a millisecond ago and the explosion looked like it wiped out all the remaints, it looked like she actually was destroyed. Using the element of surprise she killed her enemies.
Autumn: ~HIDY HO!~,
b***h.
Autumn continued her run and she thought she was probably almost there.
Autumn: This is too good! If they made it this easy then they should’ve given us 2 min-
………
………
An earthquake inside the base made Autumn fall flat on her butt. AGAIN.
Autumn: Can you stop writing that Mike? It hurts like a mother flucker!
Anyway……
…….
(sounding scared): It wasn’t 2 hours……
IT WAS 2 MINUTES!!!!1
Autumn sprinted harder than before until she came across Mike’s chamber. He was tied up on a wall. His eyes closed and his head going down. The explosions behind them got more violent.
Autumn: Dammit! I bet the others aren’t doing as good as me!
With Nicole and iDarkness…….
iDarkness: Good thing we got these guys early! Right Nikky?
Nicole: YEAHZ! AND WE GOT RITA’S TOO!
iDarkness: You can always count on them.
Nicole: Shouldn’t we untie the other Jackson Troopers?
iDarkness: Relax! We’ve got 1 hour, 58 minutes, and 37 second left!
Back with Autumn….
She had just finished untying Mike but he was dead weight. To make matters worse, the cast of HigglyTown heroes showed up.
Autumn: OMG WHY DOES DISNEY ALWAYS HAVE TO FLUCKING SING?!?!?!
You know what, I’ve got 15 seconds to kick your asses!
In 5 seconds Autumn killed them.
Autumn: Dammit! We’re not going to get through this! There’s no escape!
Mike(barely speaking): The……..
………
……….
Bodies…….
Autumn: Now’s not the time Mike! We’ve only got 7 seconds before we got Asta la Bye Bye!
…….
Hm……The bodies.
With time finally up, THE BASE EXPLODED INTO MILLIONS OF PIECES WITH EVERYONE INSIDE
Afterword.....
How Chris got Jazzy in this one dream mesa had
Jazzy: You know I'm tried of all the political talk these days how come Obama makes all these promises and goes flip-flop with energy sources like McCain I think Obama should've picked Hiliary for his VP choice I personaly think Republicans aren't coolio cause they don't look out for our people but Democrats need to get their facts straight honestly if I vote well you know what I would do? Right?
Chris: Ummmmmmm.......Yeah?
Jazzy: Finally someone who listens to me and my run on sentences!
Chris: Hey you wanna go to my apartment?
Jazzy: Ugh! What kind of girl do you think I am?
Chris: Uhhhh.....
Mike(super sexy voice): Need a moment?
Chew it over with twix
Chris(eating it): Uh yeah so we can blog and stuff.
Jazzy: Oh blogging!
I llove blogging letsa go!
Mike: lol guys this is just a dramatization hope you enjoyed your first week of skool's!
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