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You can get s**t-faced,
Be s**t out of luck,
or have s**t for brains.
With a little effort,
you can get your s**t together,
Find a place for your s**t, Or
be asked to s**t or get off the pot.
You can smoke s**t,
buy s**t,
sell s**t,
lose s**t,
find s**t,
forget s**t,
and tell others to eat s**t.
Some people know their s**t, while
others can't tell the difference
between s**t and Shinola.
There are lucky shits,
dumb shits,
crazy shits,
There is bull s**t,
horse s**t and
chicken s**t.
You can throw s**t,
sling s**t,
catch s**t,
shoot the s**t,
or duck when the s**t hits the fan.
You can give a s**t or
serve s**t on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep s**t
or be happier than a pig in s**t.
Some days are colder than s**t,
some days are hotter than s**t,
and some days are just plain shitty.
Some music sounds like s**t,
things can look like s**t,
and there are times when you feel like s**t.
You can have too much s**t,
not enough s**t,
the right s**t,
the wrong s**t or
a lot of weird s**t.
You can carry s**t,
have a mountain of s**t, or find
yourself up shits creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to s**t and other times you
fall in a bucket of s**t and come out smelling like a rose.
When you stop to consider all the facts,
it's the basic building block of the English language.
And remember, once you know your s**t,
you don't need to know anything else!

Don't tell me I told you it wasn't...