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Like I said I hate december all the bad memories ome back,
in december I am almost every time alone three years ago I was even alone on the christmas days.
when I was little I loved christmas the hole family was happy and talked,
now it looks like it was 100 years ago the family isnt any more the only family I have is my own brother,sister,mother,father and some other cousins and my special angel my niece Lisa she is my everything.
but yeah now in a few days it is again christmas and to be honest I hope I die before those days I cant handle the feeling again I hear from friends what they gonna do or what they get,
I am really happy for them REALLY but I know In my heart that I am jealous .

and with these words I hope that every single one of you have a nice christmas and a wonderful new year.