Those words that you said to me
Were only heard as a faint mutter in the darkness
Seeming unimportant to me
I felt it wasn’t something you could just utter
I didn’t seem notice that you
Were saying it differently for a long time
Why didn’t I run when I had the chance?
And maybe if I paid attention then
I wouldn’t be the one hurt in the end and
Memories wouldn’t haunt me
If only I could remember the good ones
Only the bad stay in my mind
Paining my with the agony of a lost, pointless love
If only I could be allowed to call it that
Not even sure that you regarded it as the same
It could all
Just have been
A game
But of that I know I’ll never know
I think some memories are coming back
But I cant be sure
Just to be able to be close to you
Just to be able to be with you, differently than before, one more time
Even if distant memories flood me with an agony that I don’t get at all
Its okay
Its alright
With my stupid revolving thoughts
Will the day ever come, when I’m at peace again
That, who knows?
This repeating question lingers softly, invisible, in the heavens above
And becomes the light of the dawn’s sky
Everything you ever said
Could have most likely been an illusion
Gone as quickly as its said
The love that you talked about had already ended
Loneliness took over me
Tightening its hold like constricting chains, spilling my internal blood
You can hear my scream cut through the wind
Did it suddenly get colder?
Its only because you are now here
It doesn’t really bother me at all
I just cant seem to let go of the words that the darkness took
Just seeming to take a shallow breath
Just to feel the same pain repeatedly again and again, endlessly
Little by little I slowly realized
Of this ‘love’ there was only ever one person involved, it wasn’t ever nearly enough
To actually mean something
I know who I want to protect
Even if its not myself
that’s okay for now
Its enough
At the next dawn the fragments of my rusted regret that I caught in my hands
Could just as easily turn to light
Just to be close to each other
In a healthier way that before
In a safer way than before
would that be okay?
Of that I’ll never be sure
Until we try
I cant help but ask, “Is that alright?”
Who knows if you’ll answer…
Just to be able to be close to you
Just to be able to be with you, differently than before, one more time
Even if distant memories flood me with an agony that I don’t get at all
Its okay
Its alright
With my stupid revolving thoughts
Will the day ever come, when I’m at peace again
That, who knows?
This repeating question lingers softly, invisible, in the heavens above
And becomes the light of the dawn’s sky
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