Ok...Well...I don't even know where to start. Ok, so I slept until 3 this afternoon, and I felt like my whole day went to a waste, I mean, It's already starting to get dark outside...*sigh* I guess that's where it all started, since I woke up this whole day hasn't felt right, I just feel like something is wrong or something I don't know how to describe it.
My little sister's friend was here last night, and she pretty much chilled with me all night. She even slept in my room lol XD. Honestly I think she likes me more than she likes my sister. Which kinda rocks because for a 13 year old she's pretty cool. Although she did kinda depress me last night. She's 13 and already has a boyfriend, and he's really hot! It makes me feel like my life is just being wasted away...Plus I've been reading romantic mangas lately, which has only depressed me even more, I never realized how much I hated seeing happy couples together, when I'm not happy. I feel like I just need to get away from everything for a while, I just wanna leave for a couple weeks, not talk to anyone or see anyone, just be alone with my own thoughts. I know that' not going to happen but still. I guess I just wish I had a boyfriend who would hold me, and kiss me, and treat me the way I've always wanted to be treated. Damnit. I haven't felt like this forever! Not since my sophomore year (last year) when I had the hugest crush on this guy, but he didn't return the feeling. But after he moved I felt a whole lot better, not having to worry about what he thought of me...and then he calls me bragging about his new girlfriend....which just pissed me off and upset me even more.... Now i'm getting that feeling that i'm not loved or anything. cry Jeez, I just cried, and I haven't cried like that in forever.
A lot of my friends are in happy relationships (or in a couple cases, happy denial, which would even be fine with me) Problem is, I don't see any guys I like...although I do have a limited choice here...I thought about changing my whole appearance, like, my attitude and everything. I'm not exactly what look I would go for, right now...I guess I don't really have a look. Makes me seem boring, generic, blend into the background kinda girl.
I honestly haven't left my house most of the break...only to go to work. I wish I lived in a bigger town sometimes...There would be more stuff to do. And more guys lol. ugh...I guess that's all for now, I can't find anything else to really talk about.
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Kaylin's Daily Life...YAY!!!
My Journal, feel free to read and you just might find something about me you didn't know :3. I enjoy comments and advice on my problems or just your insight on anything.
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I'd fake blindness to touch you in appropriately ;3
My name is Kaylin, yes, adore it.
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User Comments: [1] [add]
Community Member
Hey Kaylin, do something for me - smile ^w^ even if its a bad one you will feel a bit better
you know everyone goes through these times even me sometimes, were I wish I had someone (of the opposite sex) for me so I can hold them, and love them and have them love me back, and then everything is depressing because you see everyone has it but yourself, so don't change your appearance, just relax be yourself and believe that there is someone who will like who you are.
I think your a very good person and understand things that other people don't, and I think you have the potential to be even greater and successful, if you keep beliving in yourself
Its normal and human to feel depressed about things we don't have, Love is very important and teenagers in this age in time tend to ignore it, because we live in a cosumerism economy, were everyone is attracted by physical products and new fads, and they buy buy buy and that's all they do - they are controlled by marketing, and live dress and act like it, because they want to fit in, but all of this makes their minds blurry and they ignore the fact that they need to love and to be loved, even if its a single hug a day from someone who cares
everyone needs to make their first steps, and the first step in a journey is the hardest, soo believe in yourself, love yourself , and keep going, and other people will appreciate that, even if many opportunities pass by - just think its not big deal, if it didn't happen it must of not been for you
I believe for you that all the guys that you see and cannot get just means that they are not meant for you - and there is someone greater for you out there, I believe in this
I'm glad I know you (your a fantastic person and will go far in life)
Your Good Friend - Isaac
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