Mood: Cheery n.n
Currently Listening To: "Stickwitu" - Pussycat Dolls
Currently Listening To: "Stickwitu" - Pussycat Dolls
Today, Lisa was off of work, so I didn't have to babysit, but she did come by to pay me for the 4 days I worked.
This morning was HORRIBLE. I have lost cherished people in my family, but nobody as close as someone like my brother, mother, father, best friend, ect. I don't know the pain of such a situation, and last night, I had a bad dream of losing a VERY close person. Someone I love bunches.
The dream went like this, I was in this small area, with a hallway, some doors, and a staircase. I walked in to see a loved one and another friend going to commit suicide by poison. In my dream, I was shocked, and I remember crying, then yelling over being upset. I remember the friend starting to cry, but the one who was the closer friend to me blew it off, wanting desperately to go on with the suicide. In the dream I yelled and cryed to know why, only for the close friend (now will be called friend A) to walk right up to me and threatened to hit me. Upset, I ran into a room and shut the door. Moments later, I walked out again, and began to plead and beg for both friends, mostly friend A to reconsider. I remember that friend A only pushed me aside, and ran halfway up the stairs, and poisining herself. I ran to the stairs, screaming in sadness once again, but when I got there it was too late. Looking back down, I saw the other friend on the floor, bottle of poison still in hand.
I woke up almost drowning in my own tears it seemed. I had to slap myself to tell myself it was only a dream, to snap out of it. I sat up, but everytime I pictured the dream I started crying again. Just imagining someone I love so much kill themselves and I had the chance to stop them when I didn't, and then another person I could have maybe stopped. I knew it wasn't real, but sitting in my bed, I felt horrible, guilty, stupid, weak, lost, empty, confused, all these bad feeling. I almost called friend A at 6:00am just to make sure they were ok.
What a morning, It was the first time I ever remember waking up crying. And I NEVER EVER want to go through that again. Losing someone in a dream is bad enough, I'd hate to see if it would've happened in real life.
Annnywaaaays, I got up, took some headache pills (2, just like the bottle said, after all the crying and thinking, my head was killing me), took a hot shower to relax myself, then I went back to bed, and woke up about 8:00am, now calm, which I was the rest of the day. n.n
I spent some time developing a new character I made based on the Naruto storyline. If I was dedicated, I would LOVE to make a fanfic out of this. It's about this girl by the namke of Uchiha Hiniku. Yes, Uchiha. The point is that when she was little, her family moved out to Sunagakure (The Sand Village where Gaara-kun lives! <3) where she met little Gaara. Being a Uchiha, she wasn't scared of him, and the two became bestest best friends. However, During the night of the Uchiha Clan Massacre (DAMN YOU ITACHIIII!!!!) Itachi did not forget this family, and before news got to Hiniku's family, Itachi arrived after a few days to finish off the rest of the Uchiha clan. However, Hiniku's father told Hiniku to stab herself with a kunai in a exact spot on her body, and make it look like a suicide. Now about 7 (or whatever age Sasuke was at the time), Hiniku did as she was told, putting her in a death like state. Itachi believed that she was dead, and after murdering her parents, he left. A few days later, Hiniku awakens with Gaara at her side, and she tells him all what happened. Gaara tells her she must change her name and appearance so Itachi doesn't find out she was alive. Hiniku does so, changing her last name to [haven't thought of one yet] and letting her short hair grow long. Years passed, and Hiniku was still in hiding under her name, and ever since she learned to use the Sharingan, Gaara and his siblings (Temari and Kankurou) told her she musn't use it in public. ((Note: Because Gaara had a friend when he was little, he isn't the psycho killer he was in Naruto anymore)) When she was about 12-13, she got word that there was a Uchiha still alive in Konoha. Never forgetting her roots, she goes to the Kazekage. Immediatly, word gets to Konoha's Hokage that Sasuke has another relative alive. Hiniku is sent to Konoha to meet her relative, but Gaara isn't able to come, so she promises to write to him during her say. With a hug goodbye from Gaara, Temari, and Kankurou, she is sent with a Sand Jounin (elite ninja) to Konoha. When they get there, a group of Konoha ninja (To be exact, kurenai, asuma, kakashi, and GENMA <3) escort her to the Uchiha mansion, where she is introduced by a disbelieving Sasuke. The only thing proving she was a Uchiha was a small necklace with the Uchiha fan symbol on it. Or so they thought, Activating the Sharingan, she prooves that she is of Uchiha blood. And so starts the story of Uchiha Hiniku's new life in Konoha, living in the Uchiha mansion with Sasuke, learning about her clan that she never really knew of.
If I would write this in a fanfic, it would NOT be a SasukexHiniku story, nor would it really be a GaaraxHiniku story. However, in math class, I even wrote letters to Gaara from Hiniku about her stay and such, just because I was bored and wanted to add a bit to my story. n.n The story kinda starts off explaining about Hiniku and Gaara's friendly relationship, and introducing the nice Gaara that became normal because he found a friend, then it turns into about Hiniku having to hide her real identity from everyone, and eventually turning into about her trying to get a better family relation ship with Sasuke and meeting all the Konoha people, at the same time keeping in touch with Gaara! <3 I've dreamed up and thought up of bits and pieces about the story, one that has a bit including Sasuke crying and hugging Hiniku because he finally has a family he could learn to love and not hate like his brother. Another bit that includes Gaara going to visit Hiniku, and getting introduced to her new Konoha buddies. It's all good.
The End.
DAMMIT, I keep rambling today. TwT Oh yeah,
Once my internet connect on MY computer comes back. I will Be able to upload my new jounal header. Say byby to my gravitation header! The new one will have a image from a Naruto doujinshi cover. The doujinshi is called Hide & Seek, and the picture was cool, so I took it. The picture is taken from Crazy Planet, so I managed to put crazy planet on the corner of the picture. I hope you guys like it! The one I have now was just getting old. x.x
OH MY GAWD!!!
Christmas Eve is tommorow. I will try and get some avatar art scanned. I still havent drawn everyone, but it doesn't matter because with my computer moved, I can't scan pictures right now. Hopefully I can get them up somehow, but please don't get upset if your avatar art comes late. n.n; Gomen. (<--it means sorry)
Well, I can't think of anything else to say! n.n I hope you all have a great Christmas Eve and a Happy Holidays!
*can't wait until Sunday, not ONLY because it's Christmas, but also because the latest chapter of Naruto is available for download! Yaaaay! I still hate you Sai! >< But you intrigue me because of your similarities to Sasuke, but you are NERVE RACKING!! I know you have emotions somewhere in that head of yours! ...By the way, Sasuke still hasn't appeared in Part 2 of the manga, yet. I wonder how he's...matured...in 2 and a half years. >w< I hope he's still hot. <333 And Orochi-kun better leave him alone! T.T Save him, Narutooooo! Sakura, too, because in Part 2, she's really cool. cool *
Paige: Rambling again.... stare
#o.o#....My bad. xd
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And Merry Christmas, sheila.