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Stuff from my heeead..
Here's where I'll be taking things that come into my head and putting them in words on this here site for people to see.
As I already told you... I really feel like I'm holding you back. I feel like a terrible friend because I'm keeping you from things you want to do. Even if it is something as small as dancing at a party, it still affects you because you want to be social and make friends but I'm being shy and selfish and telling you that you can't. That's not what friends are supposed to do and I'm a crappy friend for doing it.
I guess going to college will be good for you. You went to one orientation and you've already made friends. Kudos to you. I wish I could do that. At least when you're in college you can be social and make plenty of friends who will probably introduce you to even more people and you can actually go to parties or raves or whatever and have a good time. They'll incourage you to instead of say "Umm no. How about we sit in a corner alone?"
I don't know if you see me as a bad friend or what.... I bet if I asked you'd be sure not to hurt my feelings by telling me that I'm a great friend.... well I disagree.

Sorry for always getting on your nerves, by the way... I guess I don't know why I do it. I'll taunt and tease you and apparently I enjoy seeing you ticked off. But of course right afterwards I feel like a jerk and you're pissed off and it's usually downhill from there. But sometimes you tease back and after a while I can't tell if you're teasing because you're having fun with me too or if you're mad and you're trying to get back at me. You'd think as a friend I would know you well enough to not have to ask myself that....
I wish I could take the guesswork out of being a good friend.


So...... After thinking about it for a little while... I'm hoping you do find some really great, new friends in college because I'm one piece of s**t friend and you deserve better because you've always been a really good friend to me. Sorry I didn't give you much of a friendship in return.





 
 
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