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I'm runnig out of time
and runnig out of sensless rymes
my heart is as black as my hair
my memories as black as my mind most of the time

headacks, heartakes, and memories, why can't i remember
did i scream, hollar, fight you off
did you shed the clothes completly off
so many years ago

my memory gone black but why
what happened that mid summer day
when i went to your house to senslessly play

to young to know what was wrong
but i knew it was all alonge

did you drug me, hurt me, and what did you take from me
i ask if i wish to know the answers
to go back and see what really happened to me

i know parts but the most impotant is a blur
i met you in the afternoon
left at nightfall

what can't i remember
minutes, seconds, hours
how did you make me forget
that one day i will forever regret

inside i know the answers i seek
the answer that emerges is bleek
it was dug down deep for me not to see

so many years later i remeber
it dawns on me
this time i seek to see

did you really rape me
the nightmares of you say yes
my mind wants to scream no

i can't go with the flow
a pink tanktop, shortz, a little ten year old blond
red and black boxers, a fourteen year old friend

you moved from the red house before i could remember
my blue house forever filled with no answers

did you rape me
did you take me
why can't i remember
the memories burned into embers

i now wish to see what happened to me
to face head on all the wrong
tears finally peak after four years of forgotten memories

do not give me sympathey
just get away from me
let me see what i need to see
then disappear into forever
away from me

the journal entry is finally written
the book threatens
it scares me into submission

your face forever imprinted into my visiion
a nightmare that will never leave
after i finally give up and remember, see, what you did to me.

my heart, my soul, my innocents
stolen and forgotten
do you even remember
do you think about it at night to
are you sorry or are you convinced you did what you had to do