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The Man Behind the Sexy Avatar
I normally wouldn't assume that people give a damn about the opinions of an anemic, greasy sixteen year old from New Jersey suburbia. But recently I heard that I'll get fifty gold per day, per journal entry I submit. I like gold; it appeals to my interest in shiny objects, and amounts like that will, over time, greatly contribute to the change jar I'm saving up for Z-Day (it's going to happen, I tell you!). Those beef jerky strips and carbon steel machetes won't buy themselves. So, sit back, relax, try to stay awake: a little blurb on the fascinating life of Yours Truly.

As previously mentioned, I'm sixteen years old. I live in New Jersey, and according to UrbanDictionary.com, I'm what's known as a greebo.
UrbanDictionary
Idiotic-sounding definition for a person who likes heavy metal/rock etc. Used by members of the flock to pigeonhole individuals into a category. Describes a person who won't follow boring trends or be brainwashed by the constant stream of waste excreted from the filthy abyss of the pop music industry.

Needless to say, I'm a sexy monster. rolleyes Maybe literally. I love trolling; it intrigues me, entertains me. Watching morons' responses to obvious sarcasm is nothing short of priceless a lot of the time. However, even I have to draw the line somewhere: if you want me to think you're intelligent, you need to have adequate knowledge of the English language, and use it frequently. You need to not change trends as often as you do underwear, or get butthurt over something I say (mostly because it'll just lead to more trolling), and most importantly, you must NOT be a feminist. I'll gladly hang out with a humanist any day, but people who fight for rights that they already have, and demand both equality and special treatment at the same time are destined to be manipulative imbeciles whom I want no association with ... finally, if you're one of those people who goes, "OMFG u said 'f** u' ur reported lolol," we'd be better off never acquainting ourselves.

I like classic rock and don't deny it; though, I tend to lean away from generic "sex, drugs an' rock'n'roll" songs with inane lyrics, repetitive melodies and three chords each. As thus, I usually add one or two songs from each artist, but like all rules, this one has some exceptions. The Doors are awesome. Yes is awesome. Jethro Tull is ******** epic. I don't like much metal, but Ozzy is good, Dio is good, I like Black Sabbath (while Ronnie James was lead), Iron Butterfly ... and Three Inches of Blood. Yeah. Cam Pipes may sound like a dying cat having a prostate exam, but it's AWESOME. That other vocals guy is all right. But I digress ... I really like Prog-Rock recently. Jon Anderson's absurd lyrics, Chris Squire's awesome bass licks, Keith Emerson's spooky keyboards, Ian Anderson's heavy metal instrument ... I eat it all up. I can't get enough. I may be too young to die, but I'm sure as hell not too old to rock and roll, and neither are they. Heil!

I've rambled a lot, and I have an English essay to go fail, so I guess I should wrap this up ... with a picture of moi.
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... Why do I always look like I'm squinting? And that lopsided smile— like, e-eww? Great hat, though. The long, luscious locks don't hurt, either.

... 'Til next time, I s'ppose. Don't be a lurker, leave a comment. Feed my massive ego, I dare you. I promise to pretend to care about what you have to say! biggrin





 
 
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