ok. yes im a male named Daniel, im 21 now and at this moment live in the state of new york. But for a while now i have been attracted to other guys as well as girls, i have been wearing girlly clothes such as my favorite pair of boots, girlly light jean mudd jeans, a black tank top with a pink, collared v neck tank top on top. i wear makeup from time to time but mostly just eye liner. The big problem now is... im moving to my homophobic father's house in Florida because i have no where else to go sad he wants me to not wear the girlly clothes that i feel so comfortable in. so in about a week i will be forced to live in Florida at my homophobic father's house with no liscence (cant get it for a year) no job and nobody i know around except my homophobic family (Father's side)
i also cant stop thinking about my ex (since september) She was great to me and for some stupid reason i made the HUGE mistake of cheating on her with her best friend.
ok so her best friend was my ex off and on for 9 years before me and my resent ex got together.
So ya i have no idea about how to feel. my emotions and everything else about me is burnt out. sad
I'm at the point where i don't want to die, live, or even exist. i just want to be gone; never have existed; so i would and will never hurt anyone ((friends, family, her)) ever.
i'm just ranting and seriously don't know what to feel, any advise?
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wow its been almost 2 years since i first posted this and i feel almost the same. except my ex and i are on better terms now and we dont think of each other as "ex's" but as come and go friends with benefits till we get to be together once again.
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