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I hate dreaming of something that will never happen. I just want it to happen so badly that sometimes I cry because of it. Stupid girlish dreams make me sick, and yet I dream them every night. To be loved in return by someone you're attracted to is a nice feeling, and I doubt it'll ever ever happen for me. My friends make it look so ******** easy. Yet it is so hard for me to find someone.

I've got people interested in me, but they're not what I'm looking for. They'll only drag me down and I don't want to be pulled down again...I can't take that. What I want is someone who is more mature, but is also willing to have a great time doing stupid things. This person doesn't exist.

Meh.

It doesn't bother me much, only late at night. All I do is work, and the man of my dreams is not likely to drop by my line.

Part of me wishes it to be true.

I've got several younger guys coming through my line on a regular basis tho...

*smacks self*

Maybe I need to drop another 20 pounds. 110 seems a bit aneorexic for someone of my height...people like it. D: *smacks self* Maybe I should just change myself entirely so no one would even recognize me.

Or my braces.

That has to be it.