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I get attached to people way too damn easily. I mean, my last entry about Joey was proof of that. I meet someone, or make a new friend or something. And I will damn near do anything for them. I am too trusting. And damn the fact that I have a conscience! I do something that might not have been the best thing to do, and it eats at me. I can't stand seeing anyone hurt. Ever. Even if it is my worst enemy. Why? I don't know. God cursed me with a soft heart? Too soft a heart I say, the damn thing is practically made of mashed potatoes. What happened to the heart of stone I used to have? What happened to back when I didn't care about anyone? When I had one or two close friends and it was all I needed? Back when I was cold and unfeeling and numb to anyone? It's like the icey barrier melted and i was flooded with emotion. And now I care too much about everyone. It's insane. I don't get it. Some days I would give anything to be numb again. It's so much easier. But most days I don't. I don't think I could be who I am now, and have the friends I have now if I had remained so distant and closed off.

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