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FAVORITE QUOTES

"Don't meddle in the affairs of dragons ~ for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."

"Nobody's a virgin, life screws us all."

"Don't piss me off, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies."

"Who, what, where, when, why, huh?"

"Before you judge someone, walk a mile in his shoes. Then you'll be a mile away, and you'll have his shoes."

"I wore black before it was cool."

"Love your enemies, it really gets them confused."

"Remember, pillage first, then burn."

"Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and revenge is too. Well, the roses are wilted, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl is empty, and so is your head."

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me."

"The last time we mixed politics with religion, people got burned at the stake."

"May your brake pedals be eaten by acidic snails!"

"The only problem with Baptists is that they don't hold them under long enough."

"I haven't lost my mind, it's backed up on disk somewhere..."

"If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?"

"If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."

"If you don't like my driving, stay off the sidewalks! duh"

"It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you."

"Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time."

"Learn from your parents' mistakes, use birth control!"




cashier"a double quarter pounder... for a cop."
fat cop"what the hell does that mean? your gonna spit in it arent you?!"
cashier"dont spit in that cops burger"
later...
fat cop"does that look like spit to you?"
other cop"yeah"
fat cop"awe ******** it" *eats burger* -super troopers




"very nice. how much?" -borat

Ms. Marie "...across the hall."

Me "poor Stephanie..."
Stephanie "you make me sound like a poor person!"
Me "Who knows maybe you are and youre homeless now!"
Stephanie "Yeah i have to live on the streets cuz i got evicted from my cardboard box!"(sarcastically)
Me "well howd you get your clothes?"
Stephanie "i stole them off of some other homeless person."
Me "you mean you let a homeless person walk around freezing?!...naked?????!!!!!"

Me "its an under-exaggeration!!!"
"is there such a thing?"
me "idk but now there is!!!"

stephen colbert "i believe that its yogurt... however i REFUSE to believe its not butter"

i told you that guy was fruity!!!

shaylor - rice!

wetless wednsdays