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Iam sad, depressed, downcast, downhearted all of those things, in one person. Ultimateyaoilover, is apparently mad at me. She is jelous that my parents give me things, even though, my grandparents looked ahead for my borother's and my future and set aside moeny for us so we can get the career we wish to have, I would like to be a character designer, so computer, programs, all of those things for this area is expensive, but nessisary. It started when my parents finally bought me a new computer, albeit an expensive one, but graphic designers need the tools nessisary for their job, I finally got my computer after more than five years of asking, and lies inbetween, so naturally, I was happy,sort of, I was sick too...still am when Iam writing this. Iam happy about a lot of things I get, so like everyone else, I just tell people.I thought ultimateyaoilover would be happy that I finally got a computer, but I was wrong. I know Iam lucky, and blessed but I don't rub it in everyone's faces unless going, "hey I finally got a computer ^^" is rubbing it in your face, which ultimateyaoilover is saying Iam doing, rubbing every little thing in everyone's face. She says she hates me and that when I ask questions like, "when are you getting a new car?", wich is a question everyone asks, or "my cell phone is better than yous", I didn't even know, didn't even bother to check, I was just happy I got a new one. She also said, I would only use my computer for artwork, not caring about my career goal. Yes she wants to be a vet and everything, but her parents are probably saving up for her right now so they can get her tuition and all the items nessicary for the task ahead, it's hard becoming a vet I know, very stressfull, time consuming, late hours, and a lot of study. Apparently I dont know anything to her, I just some thing on two legs that walks around mindlessly seeking enjoyment.But the things she doesn't see is that she goes to anime cons and buys things, every year, I went to some cheep one once and bought a couple of things.She went to boston and had a good time with her other friends, went to the local anime store there, with on the east cost everything is imported there.But since Iam dyslexic, I have a hard time, she has some, but she can take pills for it, I can't, I had to relearn evertyhing that was school based and I struggled by to do my best, I even did better than some other kids only because I worked it out or they just din't try at all.In my family out of my brother and me I got my diploma, I didn't drop out or go to some independant school, I tried to stay with it, but apparently, Iam too stupid, too idiotic to be even able to achive medicore to ultimateyaoilover. She always tells me I won't understand this or that, how will I know if I don't even try? I never tell someone your too stupid enough to get it, if they don't I try explaining. Iam just too depressed, sick, and stressed right now.She doesn't have to deal with an older sibling getting a DUI, and all the payment costs, a sibling that has totaled 2 cars, a sibling who has gotten hurt and you have to be at his beck and call.All that she has acomplished, is making me cry and even more stressed, more sick.She says she hates me, becasue my parents get me these things, but their just looking out for me, so that I can get a good life.
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