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When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down happy. They told me I didn't understand the assignment. I told them they didn't understand life.
-John Lennon
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The worst way to miss someone, is to have them sitting right next to you & you know you can never have them.
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The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity.
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The worst kind of love is the one when you want someone but you know you can’t have them.
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Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyways.
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A friend is someone who will share an umbrella with you. A true friend is someone who will take the umbrella and yell "RUN, b***h, RUN!!!"
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I miss a time I never knew.
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Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
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Anyone can hate. It costs to love.
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Love is like quicksand…The further you fall in, the harder it is to get out!
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The more people I meet, the better I like my dog!
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Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.
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Chocolate, men, coffee – some things are better rich.
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Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
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Coffee is not my cup of tea
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All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person
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I like kids, but I don’t think I could eat a whole one.
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I said “no” to drugs, but they just wouldn’t listen.
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47% of all statistics are made-up.
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I’m cle’a[ni.ng m'y' ke]yb36oa;rd.
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Linda notices that nobody ever says, “It’s only a game” when their team is winning.
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Liz is cleverly disguised as a responsible adult
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Ian just found out that they took the word “gullible” out of the dictionary!
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James is going to borrow money from a pessimist. They don’t expect to be paid back
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A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”.
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Your Intelligence is my COMMON SENSE.
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A Friend Asks For Food While A Best Friend Raids The Fridge.
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You know that point at your graduation ceremony where everyone throws their caps ? Isn’t it great that we all celebrate how smart we are by throwing sharp pointy objects in the air.
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You can lead a boy to college, but you can’t make him think.
(ooc: the problem with education and society)
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A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that ‘individuality’ is the key to success.
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I’m sorry, I’m a little busy. Can i ignore you later?
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Don’t let you mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own.
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Stupidity is like a pen, you can't erase it.
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If you can’t ignore an insult, top it; if you can’t top it, laugh it off; and if you can’t laugh it off, it’s probably deserved.
-J. Russell Lynes
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Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
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Love is like a glass door…
Sometimes you don’t see it and it smacks you right in the face.
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When I see your smile, and I know it’s not for me, that’s when I’ll miss you.
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Nothing hurts more then waiting since I don’t even know what I’m waiting for anymore.
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For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these, It might have been.
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If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
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Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
(ooc: *cough*cough* paradise *cough*cough*)
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If aliens are looking for intelligent life?! WHY THE HECK ARE YOU SCARED?!
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Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the universe.
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I’m not as dumb as you look..
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No sense in being pessimistic It wouldn’t work anyway.
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Your Boyfriend Thinks I’m Hot.
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I can resist everything except temptation.
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You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be misquoted and then used against you.
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If I throw a stick, will you leave?
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Those who think they know everything annoy those of us that actually do.
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7 out of 3 people are math illiterate.
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Let’s hope there’s intelligent life in outer space. I’m so lonely here.
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There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those who don’t
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Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
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It is because of it’s emptiness that the cup is useful.
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Don’t argue with Idiots.. They will bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
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Got any more? I'll probably add them.
 Ember1257 · Sun Aug 14, 2011 @ 10:33pm · 0 Comments |
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