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The mother, the mechanic, and the monster |
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You haven't said anything in a while you probably aren't even listening anymore....
Yes I am... Go ahead and tell me more, oh yes I'd love to hear every word you say so let it out don't let it stay cause that's what kills and that's what hurts when your stuck inside and you can't get out but here's what's worse when you have to lie cause your stuck inside the shallow mind that won't see himself for what he is, the truth behind what he gives to the world, and himself and what he thinks he is you get hurt anyone cause you only give.... Oh that's you...
That's not me...and I never said it was....
 Casandra1990 · Wed Feb 27, 2013 @ 05:13am · 0 Comments |
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As she held the crystal bottle, her hands shaking. The music playing softly in the background.
"drink it..."
"Go on..."
"It is a gift..."
"drinnnkkk"
All of the voices echoed through the air as she looked up into the first rays of light casting out the darkness from the sky. Her gloved hands slid around the top of the bottle which pulled away with a soft pop. A loose strand of her near black curls fell into her face. She looked at the sun with her deep brown eyes as she parted her lips and let the fluid flow. It was cool, like water. She closed her eyes and cried out softly. dropping the bottle as she clutched her belly. It shattered at her feet as she came toppling down onto it. Her white dress ripping and blood soaking small areas. She curled up and screamed as bone tore from her flesh, up the bone, muscle crawled until it reached around every bit of bone, then with one final cry she stretched out completely on the ground, feathers growing in, a bright white.
She laid there on the shattered bottle and layers of her torn dress. Her wings grown in full and white. As she stood up. Looking into the sunlight with her bright eyes.
She looked to the crowd who stood in awe at her transformation and whispered.
"A compliment is a gift, not to be thrown away carelessly, unless you want to hurt the giver."
She turned from them and began to walk towards the light that had driven the darkness away.
Casandra1990 · Thu Jan 03, 2013 @ 01:40pm · 0 Comments |
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[Cas]The memories...
[Cai]...stand your ground...be strong for the others...don't let the waves of emotion overtake you...it isn't worth it...They don't love you..Why do you continue to love them?...with every shattered piece of your heart... Haven't you learned? Or were those six months of hell all for not? can you just hide behind that smile and pray for a better day? the tattoo itching it's way onto your body...the reminder to just smile and pray and hope...God gave you that smile to entice, to hide, to fake, to show...God gave you the gift to be able to stand when your body says no. When everyone and all else is weak and down, you stand tall...
[Cas] but what happens if it is part of you that is down and out for this round? How do you stand tall when your foundation is crumbling away? Praying is giving me nothing...does this mean it isn't to be? does this mean I will be the last one standing alone? and that better day will never come, but I must continue to smile and hide whenever I see you and how well you are bouncing back...
[Cai] sometimes you have to hide till a better day...continue on with life..do not wait for it to fall in your lap...that doesn't happen...and most of the time when it does it is tragedy.
[Cas] I have seen so much tragedy...
[Cai] Swallow back the tears and hurt. Bring forth that pretty smile of yours and face the day. You do not need them to tell you you are worth something, to be worth something. You Are Worth Everything To Me...and I know what you are planning to do...with that red gown...if it takes them till then...then they never really knew your beauty and they only see your body...
Casandra1990 · Tue Oct 16, 2012 @ 09:40am · 0 Comments |
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my fingers dance across the keys |
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As I begin to play, with a passion, my eyes closed, my head swaying gently as my hands dance in their own way, lingering on that one note.
I play what I would expect to hear if my heart could sing. I play as quickly as I can, hearing what I would think would make it all go away..
..I feel the notes drown me in a world where it's soothing...where I am complete and I have it all...but in the reverberations of the last echoing note,
my sonata comes crashing down and I open my eyes as tears splatter the ivory.
I look around quickly as the last echos die out in the chapel...the only light the sun through the stained glass panels of God...
I am not complete and so much cannot be cured by music when the music can only echo when I cease to play it...but my melody..once an orchestra now just a single instrument...can only do one part...
just the melody of an echo long gone...too soft to hear...and I know something of how a piano must feel as it looks at the fire place to see sheet music being used as kindling smoke signaling the end of some song that you thought it would take too long to learn..
. and as I stand from my spot in the dark...I feel it all come through me...my heart swelling as my sonata cascades into a full blown orchestra of memory... and I am in a beautiful silk gown conducting gracefully.
...how glorious it was to be me...
but it is all just smoke and echos...and I am just a girl...with one instrument..
.and only memories...as I pour my heart out into my one passionate recreation of an orchestral piece into just one part...just one melody..
Casandra1990 · Thu Sep 27, 2012 @ 03:07am · 0 Comments |
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A year ago... marks the date we began falling apart...it was our prom night...and the beginning of the end of our love...You opened my eyes...filled them with tears and turned away....I gave you everything I could...you wanted someone new...now I have an amazing life with a girl who would move the stars for me...so I want to thank you...for opening my eyes. and filling them with tears..and turning away...you turned me away, straight into her arms...
Casandra1990 · Sun Apr 22, 2012 @ 02:17pm · 0 Comments |
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My December...Linkin Park...
Casandra1990 · Mon Apr 09, 2012 @ 05:53am · 0 Comments |
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...I just wish it all would just go away....
Casandra1990 · Thu Mar 29, 2012 @ 01:20am · 0 Comments |
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I close my eyes and feel waves wash over my body. I feel your haunting presence shift up my bed and cuddle close to me. Your voice whispers in my ear, as you kiss and hold me close, only to turn to ash, and blow away with the wind and the waves. and I am alone. all over again. every night I relive this nightmare. every night I see everything we had crumble. and in your twisted world of heros and knights..villans and monsters...you have no idea where we stand...or what I am anymore...I don't even know. I wish it were as easy as being a monster, with a stone heart pulsing ice through me. I wish half of the things I said to you were the truth. I wished for a lot of things, but tonight..I wish you would stop haunting me...like a ghost who is clinging on for dear life...I wish I could set you free...and me free as well...what will it take to bury this in the earth and let it rest? let it be forever in peace...behind us. I close my eyes and feel myself drowning. drowning in the scattered ashes surrounding me in the waves.
Casandra1990 · Tue Mar 20, 2012 @ 11:26am · 0 Comments |
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