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SQUIRRELS
I LOVE SQUIRRELS! SO HERE'S A LITTLE TIDBIT!
The squirrel wars started in the mid 5th century, it started over a battle for the largest nut in the tallest tree, and princess Squirrella hand in squirrel matrimony. Sir Sqirelalot had one solitary adversary named Sir Nutsalot. They fought over Squirella's hand for many years, finally they gained their armies. Did I mention Sir Nutsalot was a rare breed of FLYING SQUIRREL? Guess not, and Sir Squirrelalot was a red squirrel, Squirella is a gray squirrel by the way. Not that it matters I guess. But okies. ANywho where were we? Oh yeah armies of squirrels, Sir Nutsalot's army took over the trees with their infinite abilities to conquer by AIR and LAND, mwhahahahaha, but what Sir Nutsalot didn't count on was the nutcase squire of Sir Squirrelalot. He came up with a plan to take all the back stock of nuts and berries and catapolt them at the flying invaders. They set up fortress around the BIG tree, and waited in hiding to attack. BAM BOOM AHHHH CRASH! The flying squirrels became instantly diminished, but they didn't count on REPRODUCTION! Did I mention flying squirrels reproduce like rabbits? Where as gray squirrels suck in that aspect and can only give birth to triplets at most. HAHA. ANyways......back to the tale of squirrel history. Sir Nutsalot came up with a plan to reproduce ten times the size of the Gray squirrel army and bide his time. Withing five weeks of retreating and gaining, he inally had enough forces to conquer THE TREES! He set on his path with determination, and planned asneak attack, his troops would mercilessly pillage the branches, and plunder the holes. While Sir Nutsalot came throuhg on another entrance and snuck into Squirella's domain. She threw nuts at him, but alas she was no real fight. He captured her and carried her away to his castle high in the trees, where normal squirrels dared not go for fear of being killed! You would be scared if some unknown squirrel came flying at you with nuts too! And there he kept Squirella against her will for many years. She bared him 400 children! Didn't I tell you the reproductive organs rocked on those little things? And the war was won!
Or so he thought.... Squirella had let herself be taken, and she had a plan for she was in love with Sir Squirrelalot. She told ALL her children the story and it was passed to each generation, she soon had enough kids to OUTNUMBER her captor's army then she retaliated! Mwhahahahahaha, FEMALES ROCK!
To BE CONTINUED!!!!!! heart
Part 2
So we left off on how Sir Nutsalot thought he had won the war. Squirella had bared 400 children for him, but only to have a devious plan in the workings. She had enough children on her side to conquer his forces. But there was one problem, she still had to get her lover's help.
Sir Squirrelalot was in agony, not only had he lost his love, but the future queen of the entire kingdom of THE TREES. Not to mention her father was going ballistic. You wouldn't like to get rants from the dad either, especially with him being so hairy. On a cloudy day a little flying squirrel came out of nowhere delivering a message. The message said "Thy lover wait till kingdom come, our forces are strong but thy enemies is weak, attack at dawn." Sir Squirrelalot jumped for joy, and rounded his troop togehter, for they now planned to attack Sir Nutsalots domain at dawn.
Sir Nutsalot had been keeping a close eye on Squirela and knew the stories she fed to teh children. But what Squirella didn't know is that her little messenger also reported to him, so he knew of the attack before Sir Squirrelalot even got the message. So while Sir Squirrelalot celebrated over his soon to be victory, Sir Nutsalot was planning an even more devious plan for them all.....
To Be Continued......
Part 3
It was dawn and all the trees were silent. Sir Squirrelalot sleuthfully climbed up the trees followed by his troops. they met on subsection C, which in Squirrel terms means the 40 ft. in the air branches. Squirrela jumped into Sir Squirrelalots arms and hugged him.
*Rustle**Rustle**Rustle* Something was coming....
"ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Cried Sir Nutsalot.
The army of flying squirrels came flying in all directions and seized Squirella. Whilst fighting off the rest of Sir Squirrelalots army. "My Children come to our aide..." cried Squirella. Soon an army of 400 mixed squirrells came out of branches and attacked Sir Nutsalots army. the battel raged on, nuts and berries flying everywhere. Tails being shredded, fur flying everywhere. The battel went on for two days. Thats when sir Nutsalot pulled the tricks out of his sleeve.
Just hours before the major battle Sir Nutsalot told his allies of the fiasco that was about to go down. He wanted to wipe Sir squirrelalot off the face of the TREES! So he calle din for reinforcements, from the Black Squirrel tribes. All he had to do was throw a blue nut high in the air and they would come he sent his squire up to the top of the trees earlier to be ready, he gave the whistle and the nut flew into the air....
To Be Continued......
Part 4
Let's meet the Black squirrel army. Leader of the Black Squirrels is a ferocious female named Fluffy. Now let me tell you about Fluffy...Fluffy is leader of the black squirresl tribe of course, but she is the leader of the entire military defense team of the legion of squirrels, she's a strategist, and low and behold wants to take over the TREES. Fluffy has an army of 1000 black squirrels, and they ahve special abilities, one is there tails are like steel they can break anything, and two they have eyes that can scare its predators away. Which means that most enemies fun in fear before the battle even starts. But Fluffy wanted her army to be the strongest so they have went through physical training since they came from their mothers wombs. their bodies are muscled, their tails hard as rocks, and the ir precision deadly. But back to the story....
The blue not flew high into the air, Fluffy saw the nut, and calle dher troops to action.
"Squad 1 tkae the left flank, Squad 2, attack from the rear, squad 3 attack from the right, Squad 4 attack from the front, Squad 5 prepare the defensives, aSquad 6 prepare for an airborne attack. Now Charge my comrades!!!!"
A fierce battle soon wne tunderway, the black squirrels attcked from all angles. Fluffy had all the warrriors cornered, and they were all at her mercy. Little did Sir Nutsalot know what Fluffy's intentions were. she would conquer both tribes and steal the trees fro herself.
The time was right, and Fluffy ahad cornered Sir Squirrelalot into a tree, there was no escape, she slammed her massive tail upon his head and knocked him clear unconcious. She then took a run for the other leader, Sir Nutsalot.
But as FLuffy was running an unknown whistle sounded through the air.....
To Be Continued....
Part 5
The unkonw whistle sounded through the trees, and fluffs of white came tumbling down the trees, as a ninja would on vines. They swooped up Squirella, Fluffy, Sir Nutsalot, and Sir squirrelalot and took them higher into the trees. THey jumped from branch to branch with the speed of a thousand gerbils on a wheel. Squirrela took a glance at her new captor and saw that he was completley white. "A white Squirrel? Those are only menitoned in the legends....It can't be."
Soon they reached the fortress of the legendary white squirrels...It was a near a Buddhist temple. None of the leaders had ever been inthis vicinity before, no one had dared live so close to man. Each of the white squirrels holdign the leaders captive set off in dfiffernet directions... Squirrellas path remained the same with her masked captive. Her captive took her into his hole, and set her down. He took off his mask and Squirrela was shocked.....
The leaders were taken to seprate domains, and each were tied down. Fluffy was with a squirrel named Damien. Sir Nutsalot's captor was a squirrel named Olivia. Sir squirrelaot had been captured by Madame Nuts. Kinky eh? Lol. The legendary white squirrels were not interested in mere conquest, they were in search of a way to prevent so many squirrel deaths. The leader of the white squirrels was a brave and true squirrel named DM. DM had met Squirella when she was but a mere child. But her face was that of an angel, he promised the king that he would always watch over her, and when she was in need he would be there for her. Soon after DM had stayed in the area the entire time Squirella was growing up, making sure she didnt fall, and helping her when she needed it without her knowing. DM soon had fallen for Squirella.
bAck to Squirella! She was shocked, where had she seen this face before, she wracked her tiny little brain trying to figure it out. But all she could remember was a hand helping her when she needed it, and seeing those eyes constantly watching her. Squirrela soon realize dthis was the squirrel who had always protected her, the one she had always been searching for, and realixzed the lies Sir squirrelalot had fed her, saying he was the one. She wasn really inn love with sir squirrelalot, she was in tlove with this squirrel, shye only wished she knew his name,.
"what is it that you want Squirrella? Do you want Sir Nutsalot as your husband, or do you want Sir squirrelalot?" asked her masked captor.
"What is your naem, I've seen you before, you haev been the one in the shadows always helping me, may I please know your name?" she asked
"My name is my soul, if you whisper it I shall be yours, my name is DM."
"Dm..." Squirrela muttered
"I want neither of them, for they have tried to rule me when I was nto theirs!" she cried
"I want you DM, and I know that you feel the same, I can see it in your eyes."
"My brave princess i have always been yours, and shall always remain so. I must take care of your previous captors and tellthem that this war is pointless, for they have lost their reason to fight, for hey can never hope tyo beat the White Squirrels, we are that of legends and are forces are many they ahve only had a sample of what we could do peacefully, im agine what we can do forcefully."
DM left the hole and Squirella, and went ot her previous captors, filled with rage. He calle dhis warriors and told them to assemble on the main branch with their captives.
The warriors assembled, their captives forced to sit in front of them.
"Now listen, and listen well, this war must stop for all you are doing is waging a pointless BATTLE. This is not a real war, your reasons are too obcene to even be considered as much. Holding a princess hostage, and forcing her to bear your children what kind of Squirrel are you? aNd you, gettting involved in a pointless skirmish just so you cna take over their forces, you have betrayed your ally, that is something I cannot forgive, the legion will hear of this. and Squirrelalot you have betrayed Squirrela by feeding false information. How could you ever hope to win her over?"
"Now see here," said squirrelalot," I'll have you know that she is mine, her heart is mine to do with however I wish."
This outraged DM, and he told his warriors to take him away. He asked if there was anyone else who wishe dot outrage hhim, they all shook their heads in fear, then he asked is there anyone who is willing to challenge me for her hand? They replied in the same manor. "Then I free you from this place and know that if I ever catch you near here I will KILL you.
DM ordered that Squirrelalot be brought to the battel arena, he would teach this pompous squirrel a lesson even if it killed the little pea brained Squirelalot. Squirrelalot and DM were soon engaged ina fight to the death, insults thrown at each other, and the cheering of the viewers of this spectacle. squirrelalot was putting up a good fight, but he was bleeding profusely. Finally DM took one last swing at Squirrelalot, Squirrelalot fell like a ton of bricks. DM had won.
"You win, I give up, I see the error of my ways now let me go in honor." begged squirrelalot.
"Ok you shall go in honor, but with your life, I will not Kill you without a better reason. Now go"
Squirrelalot left the hidden village of the legendary white squirrels and left Squirella to her happiness.
DM walked back into the hole where Squirrelahad fallen asleep, "Now my dear where were we?"
THE END
LittleMissMerokoinAKimono · Mon Sep 10, 2007 @ 11:44pm · 0 Comments |
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