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Stuff that happens to me.
Well. Stuff that happens to me.
A new collection: Epic Quotes
To compliment my seemingly masturbatory collection of self esteem pumping quotes, I have began this collection of quotes I simply deem epic.

They are epic by virtue of Utter Truth or Sheer Cleverness. If you don't agree, well, that is your loss.

Matasoga
Trolls are

Trolls are a plague on the ED and mythologically inaccurate. It used to be church bells and sunlight turned their Norwegian fore-bearers into stone...If only the trolls on the ED were so vulnerable, how much better off intelligent conversation would be.


Lord Plate
The funniest part was their habit of describing things with single words in a row like

"Powerful. Accurate. Strong. Simple. Rugged."

I kept expecting "Manly. Huge. Shiny."


Fresnel
I assure you that were I that well-endowed, I would take it as my duty to be a porn star, and thus would have no reason to ******** myself in the a**.


Lord Plate
Moobs do not count.


Fran Salaska
*swaggers in* Ahhhhh yeeeeeeeah...

See? Nothing wrong with sex. At all.


daemonfelis
You take an a**s... and you stretch it. The pace that you can stretch it really depends on the a**s in question. Usually, you start with a finger... so the a**s can get used to having a foreign object in it. Sometimes it is good to talk to the a**s to soothe it as you probe it. Once the a**s is comfortable with a finger, you add another finger. Depending on the hand, this should be the width of the smallest plug out there. Then, you can increase the size of the plug inserted into your friend, the a**s. Once the a**s can stretch to a certain point, you go for organics.


lumnata
Don't be sorry, DWN. I'm sure it's a mighty fine p***s.


Sir Barton
As far as I can without causing harm. That takes knowing your partner and what will absolutely push them over the edge then just take a few steps back from that edge. You have to be able to read their body language and judge where they are so you know that you are still in a safe zone. This is even more important if they have dropped off into subspace because they may not know that they are approaching their limits. It's the Master's job to keep them safe.


Matasoga
I know that in Dungeons & Dragons flames kill trolls, but here it only makes them stronger. Here in the ED there is only one way to kill a troll and that is starvation.
Please...Don't feed the trolls.


Lord Plate
s**t, you do gender reassignment, too?

I don't want to be dead and a man. gonk


SierraBT
I'd be honored if a corrupt government deemed me enough of a threat to send multi-billion dollar machines after me.


Lord Plate
Thank you South Africa, for your unrivaled white supremacy and endlessly inventive new ways to kill the dark man.

Yeah, I'd get those for my car.


Stuch
But you listen to metal though right? Please let me pigeon-hole you.


randompurple
That is one hell of a tag-line for a product.
"Tonfa-swords. It's like a fistfight, but sharper."


GunsmithKitten
It's possible. My knowledge on ballistics trauma isn't terribly good on head shots; most of what I learned stayed in the torso region.


SierraBT
Maybe a cross between Burt Gummer and him.
My bear's name is Jerry Seinfeld. He digs in the trash.


Lewa Greenleaf
Ha, that's funny because Plate has a rapier, S. Socialist has a machette, and I have these vegistil Tyranosaurus claws.


HehFire
"Ma'am stand back a bit please, I have to poke you with this stick to check for infection."


randompurple
Lol, pregnat crack-adict provides another mouth to feed, with the promise of a third. An irritation thanks to her going cold-turkey off the drugs, and a bad physical condition. Psycho gives skill, but danger. Cross-dresser gives hours of entertainment watching them run from the horde in high heels. XP


Andre LeFarr
Also, it would make sense if TIA were an internet Surface-to-Air Masochist or whatever it stands for. They sure got the reaction they wanted.


Mazz0626
Why are you showing porn to children?


lamfaux
I accept this award on behalf of everyone who couldn't be here tonight, and I'm sorry all of the close seconds and thirds couldn't quite make it but to win you've just got to be the worst and dimmest and some of you just didn't eat enough paint chips to match my cunning stupidity. I'd like to thank Satan, thanks for always being there to answer my bids for momentary pleasure in exchange for my immortal soul.
I'd like to thank the distinguished committee that decided I was the most expendable person in the world in case of a zombie attack, i know it wasn't even close this year and it wasn't a tough decision at all but I thank you anyway, and lots of luck to the other contestant next year, I'll go put this with all of my "at least you tried" ribbons on my mantle. Thanks again!WHOO-HOO! I WON!


Who is Morgan
If I want to swear in my ******** debate then I'll ******** swear.

Censorship is a shitty-assed idea, b***h.


Poetic Vengeance
These are the people who you can truthfully refer to as feminazis, at least in my opinion. I mostly just refer to them as "ironic sexists"





 
 
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