[For this post, I'm going to constantly refer back to my posts in a certain thread that people can post in when they need to get a secret out without anyone they know hearing them, or seeing them post it. Some of the people who read my journal know about this thread, but I refuse to give out names, and I refuse to give out the link.]
So.
Remember how Adam was like,
The one I had been looking for?
Well,
As life goes,
I was wrong.
I was looking back at these messages Jessy and I wrote to each other on Myspace,
And, well,
I realized:
They deserved each other more than I deserved Adam.
The two of them were 10x happier together.
They really do love each other,
And I am/are a terrible person for getting in the middle of it.
Plus,
Adam's constant talking about her,
Referring to her,
And not showing me anything kinda helped, too.
My only regret was not seeing this sooner.
He keeps saying that he saw them breaking up a while ago.
That he knew this was coming.
I told him "Don't start."
Because,
This isn't what I need to hear.
I need to hear that he's infatuated with her.
That he wants her,
And only her.
Because that's what I told her.
She told me a few days ago that she was going to break up with him,
And see where things went.
I emailed her back today,
Telling her "No."
And how "It's a bad idea" and "A big mistake".
I don't quite know what to think;
Only that I know for a fact that I don't belong in this picture.
I've done enough damage.
I was on the phone with Adam a few minutes ago,
And I decided to tell him that I can't be apart of this,
Because I'm causing so much damage.
Because I'm tearing them apart.
Without me in the picture,
They can be together.
That's the fact;
No matter how much it tears me apart to say it.
No matter how much it hurts, it's what has to be done;
For their happiness.
Happy new year, indeed.
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The Life and Times of Tim
What's going on in my life, what's going through my mind, and song lyrics at random to FYI on my mood.
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Yellow_Coated_Bananas
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