Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

For some people shadows are described as dark spaces where the light doesn't reach, to others they are a safe haven to flee to when things are sad, and some consider it to be their own little part of life where they store all the things they do that are evil and bad. The definition for shadows to me is of this; a place for the scared and alone may hide and seek shalter from the outside world, a place where they go to try to think of life and what it has to offer, a place to go when your hurt or just want to be alone forever, and a place where they feel they belong. These are the things that make up my shadow, the things that now define most of my life, things that maybe what killed my heart.
You see, for a long time I have faught a losing battle against darkness. A battle that seems I'm losing becasue I'm fighting it alone. Heartless, unloved, lost, scared, hurt, and alone. Left by friends, hurt by darkness, and dead in heart. Nothing seems to push me onward for living, not friends, not loved ones, no one. Alone in the shadows of the world. A light thats about to go out, a forgotten friend left to die, a unloved, unworthy soul laid to rest. No one can bring my cold heart back to life. No one would even try, no one would even care, no one would even notice that theres one person missing. everyone would forget the one who was never noticed, never loved, never cared for, never conforted, never sought for when given the chance.
Once a joyous, happy, conforted boy. Now a sad, forgotten, lonely soul thats lost his way. How could one who was once such a lively child die out of existence from every around him? How can one such as he be who he is now when once he never frowned for a moment? How can anyone forget who he once was? But most of all, how does he live on?
The answers are unknown to others but thought of day by day by James. everyone who knew him as he once was never really got to know him, they never wanted to get to know him. He is now what people see becasue no one ever seemed to notice who is was or still who he is now. No one really cared for memories of who he once was because they never cared. His reason for life today is unknow even to him. Alone, unloved, uncared for, forgotten, and unloved, James may never be who he once was. " Maybe it's better that I'm not noticed, because if anyone noticed me, I'd only be another worry, another annoyance, another person to care for, another person I'd rather let be".