Lynn's cyst is apparently not as bad as they scared us with. It is shrinking though it was shaking to contemplate what could have been, what they feared.
She also felt the need to confront somebody I care about but can't be close to anymore. That seems so odd to say. I care but I can't... Feels hollow but I made my decisions, my bed, even choose my bedfellows. So now I am laying in it, feeling my stomach knot up with my own thoughts that don't listen to me. I am content with my choices but why do I feel restless.
I also know that one of my bedfellows is temporary by her own admission, I can't say I am surprised but confronting the reality is... interesting. She has own problems right now so I don't wish to think on it too much. I need to be there for her.
Apparently my body knew my lover's duties when Lynn nearly fell face first into the nightstand. I reacted without waking, my hands catching her, keeping her safe. It was interesting to feel her unconsciously and then wake to find my hands supporting her belly and thigh.
I can't properly explain my mood but I can definitely suggest songs to help flesh it out.
One Headlight by Wallflowers
Glycerine by Bush
Greedy Fly by Bush
Mouth by Bush
If You Could Only See by Tonic
Chemicals Between Us by Bush
I hate feeling disconnected. I loathe the feeling and it is not just from the situation. I want more than I deserve. I want that physical comfort, the taste of skin, the moans of my lovers. I want them both but one is distant and hurting and I am useless to give her solace. I'll need to figure a way to comfort my Hell Kitty.
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Stuff that happens to me.
Well. Stuff that happens to me.
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