i guess i was just viewing it the wrong way...
maybe i shouldn't use it as a medical pack....to fix a wound he didnt put there....
its kind of sad to be honest...
a wound i thought he had the certification to fix, that i guess can never be fixed.
a bloody gash no tourniquet can block
god was i stupid....i was so stupid...
i thought that if i found someone to stop it the pain thats been there for so long would go away, but i never will. ever. i will have this burden for the rest of my life...maybe i was in denial before, thinking that if i did that it would go away, and i wouldn't cry anymore, my doctor would prescribe medicine for that to he would wipe it all away.
DON'T PEOPLE AT THE VATICAN SAY YOU DESERVE A SECOND CHANCE!?!? WHERE THE ******** IS MINE!!!!! I SEE NO GOD COMING TO MY RESCUE!!! I SEE NO HAND FROM ABOVE!!!
...what does it matter. and ******** YOU if your some GOD LOVING FREAK who doesn't like my ******** journal. don't read the GOD DAMN thing if you don't like it. i'm not in the mood for your s**t, or better yet, prey and hope god SMITES me. then i'll post again, and laugh in your ******** face.
anyways...
i was wrong. i am forever damned, and its not even my ******** fault. all i did was wait for someone...thats all i did!...god ******** this...i'll just cope with the fact that i'll burn forever, hiding behind a broken mirror from the world.
peace out...
