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Stuff from my heeead..
Here's where I'll be taking things that come into my head and putting them in words on this here site for people to see.
So sick of guard. . .
Ugh. . . . well ok. . . I feel like I've repeated myself about a million times but. . . I felt like saying it again. . . I guess it makes me feel better or something.

Basically. . . Or colorguard team sucks. And I'm not writing this journal just to bash on people. I'm simply saying how I feel. . .
why am I trying to explain myself? Anyway. . .

I guess I'll start with the coach. = / She's SO unorganized and a procrastinator and. . . I dunno. . . She doesn’t know what she's doing. Here's sort of what my dad said:
Our coach makes us look like fools because we were the only people at the football game tonight that didn't have uniforms. She tries to please every individual judge and fails miserably. Hardly anyone knows counts to any moves and when they do know what's right, they tend to change it. . . a few days before a performance. She's not very experienced and apparently she doesn't want to get an instructor that knows what they're doing. And if she does, she sure as hell doesn't show it. . .

And we don't do anything over summer. Last year, it was almost a requirement to go to the colorguard workshops. And last year our guard didn't do COMPLETELY terrible. But this year, only 3 people went to the summer workshops. And the third person, the captain herself, only attended about 4 days of work. Out of how many? Probably about 60 since the program ran ALL SUMMER LONG.

Next: our captain. Again. . I'm not writing to talk s**t, I'm writing because my mind is cluttered with all this crap going on in guard and I wanted to type it out. XP
I know I'm weird. . . shut up. Well first of all, she has no respect for anyone whatsoever. She yells and expects everyone to listen and "ALL HAIL CAPTAIN ALEXA!" and no. . . it doesn't work like that. If we don't do something right about the 3rd time we try, she basically gives up on teaching and resorts to yelling and giving dirty looks. Apparently she thinks that'll motivate the team to do better. Well it doesn't. How in the world are we ever going to do any good with someone screaming at us all the time? Someone who gets frustrated so easily and would 9 out of 10 times criticize our new members instead of praising them for their hard work. That's a problem. . .

And, I saved the best for last!: The REST of the guard! Yes, the entire guard, including me, has their own problems that. . . we all just need to get over. Everyone on the team, EVE-RY-ONE!, talks s**t on others. . . Even me. I won't lie because, well hello?, I just filled up ALOT of my journal with s**t talking. But anyway. . .
I'm just sick of it. I'm just completely annoyed and irritated of all the drama going on. . . all the negativity going on during practices, performances and even outside of school and practice. It's disgusting and it's getting on my nerves. I'm tired of it. I don't want to hear it anymore. I do not want to be on a team that doesn't get along. We won't, and don't as it is, get anything done.
I am getting jealous, yes, totally and completely jealous, of all the other teams at our school that get along so well. We make fun of the cheerleaders, but look at them, they are, or at least seem to be, all getting along all the time. Band and football,
(Great examples) they're both like big families. That's what a team should be like. A second family. . . . I want that.
Well in guard, hell. . . we're one screwed up family. I think the problem is that everyone thinks they're better than everyone else. Everyone thinks they're more important and smarter than everyone else. Everyone thinks they're right. C'mon now guys. . . we're not perfect so you're not always right. You are no better, as a human being, or more important than anyone else on the guard. And if you're smart, so what! There's always room for improvement and you really don't need to boast. You don't need to fix someone and then laugh when they're wrong. . . That's hardly helpful. It's hurtful. As far as boasting, bragging, mean, smart people go, I haven’t really seen that happen but there definitely are people who think they're the smartest and it's quite annoying. . .
(Nise, if you're reading this, I swear it's not about you. I would tell you if you were making me feel bad. It's just. . . in general.)

*sigh* I think I'm done with this. . . I do fill a little bit better but I know I'll be in a bad mood again once I realize this one insignificant journal entry isn't going to change anything. . . ah well. . . It'll be good while it lasts. . . I guess.


So tired. . . must. . . stop. . . typing. . .

Bye. = )












User Comments: [1] [add]
Ninja Nise
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Thu Sep 18, 2008 @ 01:21am
No, I completely agree with you. We all have our faults, but there are a few of us who don't want to work on them.

When I look back at my freshman year and our first performance, everyone was so happy, and no one really cared about who got what place. We were doing it for the happiness that it brought to us and the audience. We all had so much fun just doing what we wanted, and there was no animosity. And sure, as with all families, there are bound to be some fights, and we had our fair share of them. But the thing is, people were willing to talk about them and come to an agreement. They listened to what the other said, even if they didn't like it, and fixed what was wrong.

Now, when I watch what happens around us every day, there's just so much animosity. No one's willing to hear you out, and the only way to get them to listen to what you have to say is to yell back and cause a commotion. I don't like that....... That's not our guard. And if it's become like this because of placing and getting trophies, then why should we care? I say screw it, because that's not what guard is. Guard is something that is supposed to make you happy, it's supposed to be something to "enrich" your life, so to speak.......

And I just want to know, where did it all go? We've lost the true meaning of being in a guard. *Sigh* We've tasted what it's like to hold that status, and now we've become so corrupted by it that it causes hate and discord........


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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