Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

I hope you can forgive me,
For what I need to do.
I don’t want to hurt you anymore,
I never wanted to.

So before I make up my mind,
And release you from my hold,
I need to know you’ll get over me,
Even if this action is so cold.

I know I can’t make everything better.
I know I can’t make it fine.
But I’m really happy you chose me,
And even for a moment, you were mine.

I keep hurting you and I don’t like it.
I hate seeing the pain on your face
When I say things that I really don’t mean
And are so out of place.

I want to cry, I want to scream into your chest
I never want you to leave my side,
But I haven’t been a very good girlfriend
And I know I won’t be a good bride.

In hurting you, I hurt myself, it hurts.
But I hate this so much than I can define
Than anything else, I don’t want you gone,
But I can’t call you mine.

I can’t harm the one I love.
I can’t hurt the one who loves me.
Yet I do, and I’m sorry that I hurt you,
You gave me the chance, this may be.

But if you still want me, I won’t make you leave.
I just want you to know that I love you
And I’m sorry for all the s**t I put you through
I just hate hurting you, I hope you knew.

Tell me if you want me to stay beside you forever,
Even though I say the words that hurt the most.
And I hate what I say most of the time, because it hurts you
When my thoughts haunt me like a ghost.

I hurt myself, but I hurt you more than that.
Why you love me is still a mystery,
But I’m more than happy you do love me so much
Even though it is a sad thing, our history.

Please don’t ask me why I do this
And please tell me you still love me
Even though I didn’t say it before you left.
I hope you know I’ll love you for all eternity.

These tears that stream down my face
Are not from you hurting me, not from you
It’s from knowing that all you say,
Everything you have said is true.

I still love you, but I must let you go,
Before I hurt you too much for your own good
And you leave me, even though that would hurt you less.
I’ll love you, forever, just like I said I would.

I always hurt you and I’m tired of it.
I always make you go through what I feel.
I always say the wrong things that never describe
All the things I feel inside and I want you to heal.

With me at your side, it won’t happen.
I’ll just keep hurting you time after time.
And it’s the one thing I wish to be killed for
My one and only true crime.

Please tell me that you still want me, after all of this
And please let me know that you still love me
Like I still love you, Keeper of my Heart.
And let’s stay together forever like we said we would be.

Because in the end. I really don’t want to leave you,
I just want to stop hurting you like I always do.