Below is an unaired episode. Have fun with it!
Draft 5
FADE IN:
EXT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
TITLE: "PLANET JUDGMENTIA". We DOLLY over a massive IRKEN crowd making their way to the SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT, an imposing structure on the surface of the planet.
INT. SPIKE OF JUDGMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT.
Someone ascends on a platform in the center of the cruel looking room. Three IRKEN CONTROL BRAINS hover before the bound and blindfolded figure. Huge Monitors announce "ZIM" in monstrous letters. Shadowy spectators watch from balconies lining the spike's interior. Very impressive.
THE BRAINS IRKEN: "ZIM. Your time has come. Prepare yourself for all you deserve."
ZIM's restraints detach. His blinders remove themselves. He looks around, noticing the crowd behind him and the images of his face and name that are displayed on huge floating monitors.
ZIM : Heyyy, a surprise party? Is that what this is all about? I was wondering why I was beaten up and transported from Earth to this place! A PARTY FOR ZIM!!!"
THE BRAINS : SILENCE! All will be made clear, ZIM!"
Their eyes glow strangely, and their voices ECHO ominously throughout the chamber.
ZIM: (IRRITATED) "Geeez, this is a party, lighten up. Hey, can I make a quick call?"
INT. ZIM'S HOUSE - DAY
GIR sits watching some sort of monkey beast on TV. The image suddenly shifts over to ZIM at a callbooth on JUDGEMENTIA.
GIR: MONKEY?! DON'T LEAVE ME, MONKEY!!"
ZIM: (ON MONITOR) Forget the stinking monkey, GIR. The Tallest invited me to this 'party,' and it's dead like death."
GIR: That's soo saaaad."
ZIM: (ON MONITOR) "Until I get back, YOU'RE in charge of the deadly orbital laser. It's simple: Just push the button. "
A small pedestal raises up next to GIR. On top is a button.
GIR: (POINTING AT BUTTON) "Push the monkey?"
ZIM: (ON MONITOR) Yes, GIR... the button is a monkey."
GIR pushes the button. A window opens up on the screen and we see the DEADLY ORBITAL LASER ARRAY displayed within. It sends a glowing stream of doom at the earth.
GIR: "WOO!! "
ZIM: (ON MONITOR) See? Easy. You just keep doing that until I get back. Good work, GIR."
GIR salutes, and gives a huge thumbs up while insanely pressing the button. ZIM cuts the transmission.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
ZIM rises from below and turns to the BRAINS.
ZIM : C'mon, hurry up and praise me! Every second I spend off Earth is time lost! ZIM TIME! Cuz...I AM ZIM!! Ya know?"
LEFT BRAIN : It makes noises."
RIGHT BRAIN : "Bothersome noises."
THE BRAINS : We say nothing until the TALLEST arrive."
There's a SCREAMING BOOM of the Massive as it flies in and pulls up above the Spike of Judgement.
THE BRAINS: (CONT'D) The TALLEST have arrived."
The TALLEST teleport down, much to the joy of the crowd. RED and PURPLE make their way towards a central podium.
RED: (TO CROWD) "Thank you, thank you."
PURPLE: (TO CROWD, LOUDER THAN NECESSARY) Now BE QUIET!!"
The crowd is instantly quiet.
ZIM: MY TALLEST! This really IS a surprise party! You honor me deep in the most wobbly, gelatinous parts of my squeedlyspooch!"
The TALLEST shoot ZIM the nastiest looks. ZIM is oblivious.
PURPLE: (TO BRAINS) That's great, ZIM. Start already!"
BRAINS : As you command. SO IT BEGINS."
The crowd ROARS. CAMERAS converge on ZIM. The BRAINS' eyes glow red and the lighting changes, focusing on ZIM. It looks cooool. ZIM waves to the cameras.
THE BRAINS: (OMINOUSLY) "IRKEN ZIM: Prepare for REPLAY. All your memories will be made known. Your life for all to see and know."
ZIM : Ooooh..MY incredible ZIM-life? NEAT!"
The BRAINS's eyes glow strangely. The TALLEST share a creepy, evil look. Cables snake out from a creepy monitor array above ZIM and lock onto his I.D. PAK It lifts him up and the monitors light up, showing images from ZIM'S PAST. The images flash faster and faster.
THE BRAINS: NOW, SEE YOUR PAST, ZIM... YOUR PAST..."
ZIM: (EXCITED) MY FUTURE?!"
THE BRAINS : NO! Your PAST! Pay attention!" BLACKNESS
Voices are heard. (The following is the dialogue from the ZIM birth sequence in "Parent / Teacher Night" wink
ELECTRONIC VOICE: (O.S.) Welcome to life, IRKEN CHILD. Report for duty."
ZIM: (O.S.) "I love you, cold, unfeeling robot arm."
INT. DEEP WITHIN IRK, DOWNLOAD CHAMBER - MINUTES LATER
A chute moves into position above a DOWNLOAD CHAIR. Tiny,adorable ZIM flops out of the chute and into the chair. He looks about him, wide-eyed and curious.
ELECTRONIC VOICE: (O.S.) You are two minutes old, little smeet. Prepare to be filled with the whole of IRKEN KNOWLEDGE!!"
ZIM: (CUTE AS A SMEET) Okeedokee."
The machine attaches to ZIM and he briefly shuts down as information courses into him. He spasms and jerks with the incoming knowledge. It stops. He wakes.
ELECTRONIC VOICE: (O.S.) UPLOAD COMPLETE! You have been given a name. IDENTIFY YOURSELF."
ZIM: (BLINKS FOR A BEAT) I AM ZIM!! That was ALL the knowledge? BORING!! And so many mistakes! 40 shmillion mistakes to be exact, starting with..."
Robotic fingers come out and shove him from the chair. As soon as the chair is vacant, another smeet drops into it.
ZIM: (CONT'D) I wasn't done yet! HEY, WHO ARE YOU?! "
SMEET: (CONFUSED) Ummm..."
ZIM : This is MY room. Get your own place!"
ZIM shoves the little IRKEN back into the delivery chute. The chute clogs with more smeets until the entire activation chamber malfunctions, sparking and smoking. We pull up through many layers of cybernetic earth, to the -
EXT. IRKEN SURFACE, WAY UP THERE - CONTINUOUS
The city, mighty and lit up, is enveloped in monstrous ARCS OF ENERGY, and is then dark and silent, except for sirens. The REPLAY stops.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
All the eyes in the hall are focussed accusingly on ZIM.
THE BRAINS: (O.S.) That day came to be known as HORRIBLE PAINFUL OVERLOAD DAY. IRK was plunged into darkness for five years."
ZIM: (BOASTING TO CROWD) IMPRESSIVE. Most would be happy with two years, but me... FIVE!! Beat that, YOU!"
ZIM points to an IRKEN JANITORIAL DRONE mopping nearby, who looks up, confused at ZIM's challenge.
INT - SMALL DARK PLACE.
The heads of TWO FIGURES watch the trial on a screen from someplace dark and nearby . We see only their silhouettes. They speak in hoarse whispers.
FIGURE 1: It's going well. He knows nothing."
FIGURE 2 : The moron."
FIGURE 1 : "Shhhh! There's more!"
ZIM : So... More ZIM. Come on! MORE ZIM!"
INT. DEEP WITHIN IRK, MILITARY TRAINING AREA
ZIM is a little bigger now. He sits amongst hundreds of rows of young IRKENS, wearing holo-visors and downloading new data. They all perform military simulations. ZIM removes his visor and looks around, irritated.
ZIM: Boring! Ten years and we're still in this education plug! When do we get to see the planet's surface?!! "
He turns to the young IRKENS next to him, who happen to be cute, younger versions of RED and PURPLE.
ZIM: (CONT'D) When I'M TALLEST, things will be different."
PURPLE : You? TALLEST?! THAT's INSANE!"
ZIM: The people of IRK must know my POWER! SKOODGE! " (points to a child SKOODGE) You look impressionable."
SKOODGE : I sure am!"
ZIM : Escape with me to the surface! "
SKOODGE: (SCARED BUT OKAY) "Sounds scary, but OKAY!"
The two run off, happy as can be. Idiots.
INT. DEEP WITHIN IRK, HATCH OF SOME SORT
ZIM and SKOODGE dump out of a porthole into a mechanical clearing between levels. They've been running.
ZIM: We're almost there SKOODGE! Can't you feel it, you fool!??"
SKOODGE: (REALLY FEELING IT) I DO! I DO!! I AM FEELING IT TOO-DAY!!"
A SECURITY DROID leaps into the room and stares at the two.
ZIM : Quick, SKOODGE. Name that machine".
SKOODGE: (AS THOUGH BEING QUIZZED) "DERMIS PROWLER SECURITY DROID."
ZIM: (KEEPING VERY STILL) Good. And how do they function?? "
SKOODGE : Detects motion. Homes in. Hurts TOO MUCH."
ZIM: AWESOM WORK SKOODGE!"
ZIM throws SKOODGE down a corridor and the robot is instantly after him. SKOODGE dodges the robot, causing the robot to slam into various pieces of machinery. Each lunge causes more and more damage. An alarm goes off. ZIM quickly ascends a ladder. At one point SKOODGE is hurled up near ZIM.
SKOODGE : CATCH ME! IT WANTS MY BRAIN! "
SKOODGE drops back off screen as ZIM gives SKOODGE the thumbs up, not really even looking down at him. The explosive damage resumes below ZIM as the robot pursues SKOODGE.
ZIM: EXCELLENT WORK, SKOODGE!"
ZIM pokes his head out of the surface side of the porthole.
EXT. IRKEN PORTHOLE - DAY
We don't see what he sees, but it's bright and noisy.
ZIM: (IN AWE) "FREEDOM! Hmm... A PITIFUL WORLD, WAITING FOR ME TO MAKE IT GREAT!"
ZIM smiles up at the light until a loud BOOM from below distracts him. SKOODGE blasts screaming out of the hole, chased by the robot. ZIM shakes his head, smiling at SKOODGE. There is another series of BOOMS and then the world is plunged into darkness. The replay ends.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
The room is silent. ZIM smiles and claps.
THE BRAINS : That day became known as HORRIBLE PAINFUL OVERLOAD DAY part II. Four more terrible years of darkness for IRK."
ZIM: (FULL OF PRIDE) People LOVE darkness. But enough of the past. Let us speak of the present. Do I get a little ZIM statue? Some kind of award."
INT. SMALL DARK PLACE.
The figures hunch over the screen.
FIGURE 1: (OVERLY DRAMATIC) "Every word seals his own doom."
FIGURE 2: (OMINOUS) Soon we will be rid of ZIM forever-- Hey!"
Light shines in as the roof is lifted up, revealing the two figures are actually The Tallest crouching under a blanket holding flashlights under their faces. A janitorial drone pushing a laundry cart holds the blanket
.
JANITORIAL DRONE: Oh! My Tallest! I didn't see you there."
The Tallest collect themselves. They cough, embarrassed. WE ARE ACTUALLY STILL IN...
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
RED : Ehhh... uh... We were just... "
PURPLE: We just got lost."
Red smacks PURPLE. ZIM interrupts.
ZIM: "HEY! Pay attention! You're missing my party!"
PURPLE : IT'S NOT A PARTY, ZIM! It's an IRKEN EXISTENCE EVALUATION!! AND YOU'RE-"
He slaps his hand over his mouth.
ZIM: (CONCERNED) EXISTENCE EVALUATION? But..THOSE are for criminals...and space clowns."
For no apparent reason, a cute little IRKEN smeet appears and tugs at Purple's robe. It's adorable.
LITTLE TIMMY: (ALL CUTE) Mista' Purple? Tell me all about IRKEN EXISTENCE EVALUATION."
PURPLE: (A KIND AND WISE VOICE) Well, you see, little Timmy, it's a trial for malfunctioning IRKENS. You know what a trial is, doncha', Timmy?"
Purple pokes Timmy in the belly and Timmy giggles adorably. It's so adorable it makes you sick to watch. It's that cute.
PURPLE: (CONT'D) Of course you do. Say, you see this I.D. PAK on your back? "
LITTLE TIMMY: (GIGGLING) "Nope! My head don't turn that far!"
The crowd "awwws". It's so cute.
RED: (SMILING) Hah hahh. Well, we ALL wear them. They hold the collective memories of all the IRKENS before us. Our personalities, our power, our high scores, all in HERE."
PURPLE: But some IRKENS, they get fitted with damaged I.D. PAKs These people are called "Defectives" and must be deactivated, erased, never to be remembered."
ZIM: (AGHAST) A world that does not remember ZIM??"
LITTLE TIMMY: (ELATED) Thank you mista' PURPLE! I SMART NOW!"
PURPLE : The child knows too much! TO THE DUNGEONS WITH IT!!"
GUARDS rush in and drag the screaming TIMMY away.
ZIM: Um... I think there's been a mistake. This is GOOD stuff you're all watching. Why am I on trial?"
LEFT BRAIN : Good stuff?"
RIGHT BRAIN : It thinks there is good stuff."
THE BRAINS : IT IS DOOMED."
ZIM looks around at the hateful eyes upon him. The Tallest LAUGH insanely, and the crowd soon follows suit. The BRAINS lift ZIM up, and even THEY are laughing now. Things do not look good, and ZIM knows it. The flashes of quick images starts up again and goes to black.
ACT BREAK
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT.
ZIM plays video games. A guard prods him with a shock-stick. ZAP!
BRAINS: Hey! Pay attention ZIM ! You're on trial!"
ZIM: Wha? Oh yes. That."
The screen jumps to life with a new scene.
EXT. PLANET VORT -DAY
Guards man watch-posts as military ships cruise by.
INT. VORTIAN SCIENCE LAB - PLANET VORT
ZIM, in a scientist's robe, stands among a line of scientists. The HEAD SCIENTIST talks to ALMIGHTY TALLEST MIYUKI.
HEAD SCIENTIST: TALLEST MIYUKI, welcome to VORT RESEARCH STATION 9. You honor us with your visit!"
ALMIGHTY TALLEST MIYUKI: Tell me what my finest minds are dreaming up for the EMPIRE."
HEAD SCIENTIST : Well, there's our infinite energy producing thingy. And Lard Nar here has begun work on preliminary designs for your new BLUDGEON CLASS fleet leader.
Next to the throbbing energy generator Lard Nar, A VORTIAN, salutes MIYUKI and proudly presents a holographic model of the Massive ship-to-be.
ZIM: (BUTTING IN) DOOKIE!! That thing'll never fly!"
ZIM points at the hologram then at MIYUKI.
ALMIGHTY TALLEST MIYUKI: OPERATOR, who is this little creature?"
HEAD SCIENTIST: (ASHAMED) Eh...ZIM, MY TALLEST. A transfer from IRK. He destroys everything he touches, so they figured he'd excel at military research."
ZIM : Enough praise. LOOK! I made an infinite energy ABSORBING thingy! HE'S CHUBBY!!"
HEAD SCIENTIST: No! Keep it away from the infinite energy producing thingy! "
The creature swallows the infinite energy generating device. It grows out of control -- bursting out of its little COLLAR - and then eats TALLEST MIYUKI. It then rampages out of the building and leaves a trail of explosions. ZIM raises his arms, victorious somehow.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
ZIM is dropped to the floor. The TALLEST are furious.
RED ALMIGHTY: "MIYUKI was eaten by a giant blob because of YOU??YOU????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
ZIM: (UNCOMFORTABLE) No, she called me last tuesday. Yeah... she's doin' fine. Really."
The TALLEST eye ZIM, angry and suspicious.
THE BRAINS: This is a horrible discovery, not to be taken lightly. NOW, let's break for lunch! "
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - COURT CAFETERIA
ZIM sits shackled in front of a tray of food. Guards stand behind him. He sees the TALLEST eating at a different table with a crowd of other IRKENS. It looks like the "popular people's" table at a school lunch.
ZIM: (TO HIMSELF) This is taking forever! I NEVER should've left GIR in charge. I don't even wanna THINK about how badly he's failing on Earth."
EXT. EARTH, GIR'S GIGANTIC FORTRESS - NIGHT
Back on Earth, mankind has reconstructed the planet. Everything is in GIR's image. Inside a gigantic Fortress of GIR, an open-air throning ceremony taking place atop a huge staircase. GIR sits in a throne, surrounded by gargantuan statues of himself. Humans, wearing GIR suits serve him.
HUMAN #1 : You have conquered our people with your mighty laser cannon, and we thank you. ALL HAIL OUR NEW MASTER, this... strange LUMPY LITTLE PUPPY!! "
The human places a shiny medallion around GIR's neck. GIR looks pretty happy with it. He SQUEAKS approval. BACK TO:
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - COUT CAFETERIA.
Two IRKENS walk past ZIM, carrying trays and talking.
IRKEN #1 : So, whaddaya think? Defective or innocent?"
IRKEN #2 : Oh, ZIM? Defective, all the way. This Evaluation's just a formality so they can get rid of ZIM officially."
ZIM's looks up, shocked.
ZIM : Formality? Nonsense. Justice will prevail. The TALLEST will see to it!"
The TALLEST push their own trays aside and rise.
RED: OKAY! Break's over! LET'S GET THIS FORMALITY OVER WITH! "
ZIM's eyes widen with dread. He spits out food.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
The two guards plop ZIM down in front of the BRAINS. Now ZIM looks really sick, and actually scared for his life.
THE BRAINS : EVALUATION HAS RESUMED. Prepare for more of ZIM's terrible REPLAY."
RIGHT BRAIN : But...His data makes my brain hurt. We need more brains to filter the pain..."
ZIM : Excuse me! How about for a change we show some of my... glorious acts of obedience! Like during Invader training!"
ZIM is lifted once more and the screens flicker. ZIM gestures to the TALLEST to really check this out.
INT. PLANET DEVASTIS - AUDITORIUM
The auditorium is full of INVADER TRAINEES who are being addressed by TALLEST SPORK.
TALLEST SPORK : And as your new TALLEST, I am proud to say that you INVADERS in training are the FUTURE of the EMPIRE! I'm still taller than you though. SALUTE ME!"
In the crowd, ZIM SALUTES!
ZIM: Hoo!"
'
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT.
The picture freezes.
ZIM : See. You like obedience."
RED: Wait a minute. I think I remember more happening that day."
The picture resumes.
INT. PLANET DEVASTIS - AUDITORIUM.
The crowd has thinned. IRKENS shake hands with SPORK. ZIM talks with the Invader-age Red and Purple.
PURPLE : ZIM, you've done nothing but rain horror down onto the EMPIRE since you were BORN...and NOW they're training you to become an INVADER?! WHY?!! I mean...THAT'S just SICK!!"
ZIM : Hah..flattery aside, when I am TALLEST, I will make the EMPIRE rue ever having made me wait so long to rule them! "
RED: Yeah, well, if I were TALLEST, I'd PROBABLY put you on TRIAL to defend your life. Yep, THAT's probably what I'd do. Mmmhmmmm. "
ZIM waves off RED's comment, revealing a disc object.
PURPLE : Hey, what's that thing?"
ZIM holds up the object that hung from the collar of the energy absorbing creature.
ZIM: (EXAMINING OBJECT) Oh... THIS? It used to belong to my energy absorbing thingy back before it grew monstrous and nearly wiped out outer space. Remember that? That little guy used to love this thing. I'm surprised he hasn't come back for it after all these-"
The ceiling blows in and in flops the unspeakable, now enormous CTHULU like horror that was ZIM's old energy experiment. It roars insanely, horrifying all the trainees.
IN A FLASH, the monster grabs TALLEST SPORK and pops him into its gaping mouth. RED, PURPLE AND ZIM let out a joint scream of horror as the beast flails and wobbles. Chaos!!
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
ZIM wildly waves his arms in an "ENOUGH" gesture.
ZIM: (PEEVED) HEY!! NO USING TWO BLOB FLASHBACKS IN A ROW!! That's a rule, right?!"
RED: (WAKING FROM SHOCK) "It's even more horrible than I remember! TALLEST SPORK eaten by ZIM's blob TOO...like he was just a chew-shmoop!"
THE BRAINS : YOU are responsible for the doom of TWO Almighty Tallest?!"
ZIM: (DEFENSIVE) NO, SPORK's FINE! C'monnnn!" (they glare at him) Well look, what about the glory of my performance in Operation Impending Doom one? "
EXT. IRKEN MILITARY LAUNCHZONE -NIGHT
ZIM, in his familiar INVADER attire, stands before RED and PURPLE, who are now THE TALLEST.
PURPLE : Okay ZIM, this is the empire's finest hour. And YOU'RE in charge of watching everything from this circle!"
ZIM stands in a circle drawn around him.
ZIM : But-"
RED : No no!! Don't leave the circle. Stay right there!! DO US PROUD ZIM!"
ZIM salutes. The TALLEST go away CHUCKLING. ZIM looks intense! He stands, trying to obey his orders. But the lure of destruction is mighty...
ZIM: MY EMPIRE NEEDS MEEEE!"
He leaps dramatically over the drawn circle and lands in a painful looking roll. He gets up and runs off-screen. We hear the sounds of a GIANT ROBOT powering up.
RANDOM IRKEN #2: (O.S.) Hey, has anyone seen the FRONTLINE BATTLE MECH #4? I'm supposed toaaAAAAAAGHH!!"
A GIANT ROBOT (from "THE NIGHTMARE BEGINS" wink walks into the shot and wreaks familiar havoc. It runs into the distance.
INT. TRIAL PLACE - LATER
ZIM, standing amidst the ruins of his city, is shown in another trial with a single CONTROL BRAIN, this one smaller, with different colored eyes. The TALLEST observe the trial. The giant robot can be seen nearby.
CONTROL BRAIN : INVADER ZIM, FOR SINGLE-HANDEDLY RUINING OPERATION IMPENDING DOOM ONE--"
PURPLE: Hey, where'd ZIM go?!"
ZIM has vanished. IMMEDIATELY, a ridiculously huge spider/crab-like tank lumbers by, ZIM's tiny head poking out from the top. He looks brave, but clueless.
ZIM: I'M AN INVADER! LOOKIT ME GO! WOOOO!!"
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT.
As the flashback ends, ZIM looks uncomfortable.
ZIM: (NERVOUS) "Uh...Boy those days sure were great, huh?"
RED: YOU'RE A MONSTER, ZIM. Everything you touch gets destroyed!"
ZIM : Hey, not everything I do ends in horrible explosions!"
EXPLOSION MONTAGE:
The ensuing REPLAY is a QUICK series of things going horribly wrong because of ZIM. Satellites spark and explode, giant monsters rampage, little monsters rampage, etc., intercut with ZIM watching, growing more and more skittish. He nervously gives the TALLEST a double thumbs up. They glare back. Finally:
EXT. A BEAUTIFUL FIELD - DAY
ZIM stands in a beautiful field all alone. It's so peaceful.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
ZIM looks pleased.
ZIM: See! That's peaceful-like."
EXT. A BEAUTIFUL FIELD - DAY
ZIM, still standing in the field, scratches his butt.
EXT. BEAUTIFUL FIELD PLANET - CONTINUOUS
Seen from outer space, the planet ZIM is on explodes.
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA - THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
ZIM: (TO BRAINS) HEYY!! WE SAID NO MORE EXPLOSIONS!! Cheating! Cheating!!"
RED: (DISGUSTED) "We've seen enough. ZIM, you've been nothing but a curse to the EMPIRE. If TALLEST MIYUKI or SPORK were here, they'd say so, too."
ZIM : Well, as a matter of fact, I call as a surprise witness, TALLEST SPORK!"
ZIM gestures to the audience, where TALLEST SPORK rises up to be seen. The crowd gasps. SPORK looks pretty good.
SPORK: Yes, I have returned from my vacation to re-claim my rightful position as leader of the IRKEN empire! ISN'T THAT NICE? My first act shall be to pardon the mighty and beneficial Invader ZIM!"
ZIM: (LIKE HE WON A BEAUTY PAGEANT) Yeeehooo!!"
ZIM leaps off the podium. RED and PURPLE watch in rapt confusion as ZIM runs out of the room.
EXT. SPACE.
ZIM speeds away from the planet in his Voot Runner, happy as a pig, and bobbing as though to the happiest music ever.
INT. TRIAL PLACE.
TALLEST SPORK has continued talking. RED and PURPLE approach him tentatively.
SPORK : "...and as my twenty-fifth act as leader, I order the construction of the Invader ZIM commemorative nacho palace..."
RED: (SUSPICIOUS) "Heyy...waitaminnit..."
RED POKES at Spork. A hole pops in the side and SPORK DEFLATES. It's been an inflatable model after all. RED picks up the IRKEN equivalent of a TAPE RECORDER, still spouting SPORK speech.
EXT. SPACE.
ZIM's cruiser is hit by a tractor beam, HARD. ZIM goes from happy to shocked.
INT. TRIAL PLACE.
ZIM stands at the podium in horrible chains and shackles. He's now flanked by two MAMMOTH GUARDS, twice the size of his previous guards.
RED: Nice try ZIM."
PURPLE : I wanna know why he had an inflatable SPORK with him."
THE BRAINS: We have our ruling..."
ZIM bites his lip. The TALLEST look thrilled.
PURPLE: (TO RED) Man...no more ZIM. Just imagine that!"
RED: (TO PURPLE) "I know...I've imagined it my whole life!"
THE BRAINS : OUR RULING: IRKEN ZIM's I.D PAK is damaged and has led to a corrupt data path. HE IS... A DEFECTIVE."
RED and PURPLE look ecstatic. ZIM seems to shrink.
THE BRAINS: (CONT'D) IRKEN ZIM's data is not allowed to into the collective. His PAK will be removed, and erased."
ZIM: (HORRIFIED) "But I can't LIVE without my PAK"
PURPLE: (LOUD AND INSINCERE) "AWWW... WOW. Too bad. TOUGH ONE, ZIM."
ZIM's PAK is removed. The data cables connect to it and start sucking out data. ZIM watches a monitor, horrified, as the data-stream is shown leaving a ZIM icon and flowing into a trashcan icon. His life is ending.
ZIM: (PANICKING) No... THIS IS A MISTAKE!! Have I mentioned that I AM ZIM!!!??"
The BRAINS' eyes flash with the data flowing into them. We follow the cables going into their bodies and enter...
INT. FREAKY CYBERNETIC ZONE - AUTUMN
This world inside of the brains is a virtual reality void where ZIM's memories flood out of portholes into the surreal techno-landscape. ZIM's voice echoes through the void, ringing with familiar sayings from previous episodes.
THE BRAINS: Something wrong... so much... bad data... passing through us all at once... cannot process... the horror... Going... insane!"
INT. PLANET JUDGEMENTIA -THE SPIKE OF JUDGEMENT
SPARKS shoot out of the BRAINS. GIBBERISH is issued from their speakers.
ZIM is suddenly released from his restraints. He looks up in amazement. The TALLEST watch, confused. ZIM's PAK is replaced and he seems to gain energy from it.
THE BRAINS: (INSANE) INVADER ZIM, for your heinous crimes... we declare you... THE MOST INCREDIBLE IRKEN EVER!!!
ZIM: (HAPPY) "Hey, thanks. I really am."
PURPLE : NO!! YOU CAN'T DO THAT! He's a DEFECTIVE! You ALREADY ruled!"
THE BRAINS: (BUZZING AND INSANE) Ohhh, LIGHTEN UP! LITTLE...BUMBLE BEE...aargh...THE MADNESS..."
THE TALLEST just stare at the lunatic BRAINS in disbelief. ZIM turns on the charm for the cameras that float around him.
THE BRAINS: (CONT'D) AND for being YOU, ZIM, we grant you ten free minutes of piloting the MASSIVE!!"
EXT. SPACE
THE MASSIVE careens through space.
INT. THE MASSIVE - CONTINUOUS
ZIM pilots the Massive like a little boy drives a go cart at an amusement park. The TALLEST stand behind him, weeping.
ZIM: (THE HAPPIEST IRKEN IN SPACE) "WOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!! You guys really had me going! Thank you, MY TALLEST!!"
EXT. ZIM'S HOUSE - NIGHT
Everything appears to have gone back to normal on Earth. A car dumps GIR off out in front of his home.
HUMAN #2 : Too bad about you being overthrown as leader of Earth, and everything being returned to normal. But hey...."
GIR listens very sincerely, nodding as he eats his hot dog and drinks his SuckMunky. He walks into his house. The second the door closes, the ceiling opens and ZIM's VOOT drops into the hangar. The roof closes.
INT. ZIM'S LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS
GIR sits on the couch, dirty with food and spilled drink. ZIM descends from the ceiling, looking irritated.
ZIM: Lookit this place. I leave and the whole mission grinds to a halt! GAH!!"
GIR raises his hot dog and squeals in salute. ZIM is already heading towards a rising elevator and doesn't look back at GIR. ZIM just sort of waves.
ZIM: (CONT'D) Yes, yesss. It's good to see you too. "
GIR drinks more SuckMunky and spills much all over his doggy suit. We push in on GIR as he reaches into his pockets and pulls out the medallion he was given earlier. Inscribed on the medallion is "KING GIR: RULER OF EARTH". GIR giggles.
the end.
View User's Journal
Can I play with madness?
 |
