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EDIT: Changed from Private to Public on May 19th, 2012.

I changed my profile background, and text colors, and rearranged pictures.

C:

I decided I should change my text colour afterall. It didn't hurt when I changed from violet/hot-pink to purple and it shouldn't hurt to let go of myself. I've had purple text for three years. It seems like a part of me, but I can't keep it either because it's not me anymore. I'm still the same, but a little different and that amount makes all the difference. Otherwise, I wouldn't feel wrong with purple text and wrong with my current text colour and be unable to go to one or the other. Time to put 'purple text' in the past - I can look at it, but I don't use it.

About my avatar, I had a clever idea. I thought I'd make my avatar to look like my background. And it's quite suitable ♥

As I've repeated several times already, because I don't know if people remember or read it, I'm a refined/sophisticated person. I've been complimented on my writing style. Although I've never had any etiquette lessons, I'm polite and proper, as observed by many people, enough to be disgusted by ... a number of things, depending on what they are. I have class and if something's indecent, you can bet I won't like it. It's in my elegant wiring. Despite this, I am a teenager. This puts me in a somewhat difficult position. Sometimes, or generally, I despise how teenagers act, the stereotypical kind.

To never "stoop" to the 'teenager' level again, what with the mature mind, an adult can party like a teenager, sometimes, whenever he/she wants to, if he/she wants, but at least the adult has the wisdom, experience, and sensibility the adult hadn't when he/she was younger.

It is not who is better, but who knows better.

An adult can recognize their youth's foolishness and never once acts like it again, not normally anyway because they can have occasional parties, because that behaviour is not necessary.

It is not necessarily who is better, remember, but would it be wrong to suggest the line, "One is better and more sane than a drunk, out-of-their-mind person?" I mean no harm, only to ask a question. Does it sound plausible to you?

-raises her index finger- Technically, the person is "better". The person has the clear mind.

-turns a doorknob, walks through and closes the door to a new room- My earlier mood was murky.

Sorry if my tone of voice annoyed anyone. Even if I'm a modest person about things I do, how I look, etc, my personality has this hint of 'sounding arrogant' even when I don't try or want it! It unfortunately comes with sounding the way I speak. It's horrible cause I don't want to misunderstood. Bad things will happen.

I don't deserve any glorious title because anyone can be better at anything than me. What I do like is respect though c: I'm not the most intelligent person on Earth, ex: a super genius, I don't know every single thing, and I'm the best at whatever activity you list. I can be really clumsy from not being prepared 8'D. Anyhow ~ I like to know things and explain what I know; usually or most of the time, I don't know what I'm talking about and therefore, ramble and confuse people. Opposite of concision ~ When I do know what I'm trying to say, I really do know and I can narrate with skill. Buuut, again, when I normally talk, I won't sound serious; I'll sound incredibly cheerful, emote here, emote there, and just tell you everything that comes to my mind when it quickly comes up. Two different scenarios C:


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I'm a lucky person and I wanted to comment something to my dad once. I told my dad that my parents are lucky they don't have to deal with me being a teenager in regards of partying. I told him that adults don't act like how they did in their teens because they know how to act. After translating the word 'refined' for refined person, (not like refined as in blended and pureed), he smiled and agreed with me C:

I understand that some of them are destressing by partying -- I can clearly see and hear that destressing is their intention in the dorm building -- but what's wrong with watching TV? o.o

I-I don't get it. It accomplishes the same goal =(.

(Not all people choose to party, some stay in and some have stayed in the lounge/common room to chat, but that was only two or three times, in the beginning of the year. Usually people stay their own room, go out, or go to someone else's room to "make some noise~~!! ;D" > > )

Watching TV or hanging out with friends, talking and having a good time, are they not options? ;A; The goal is to turn your brain to mush by doing nothing ~ I don't get it. I can watch hours of episodes of something I want to watch, either by myself or with a friend, and by the end of one night or three nights of watching episodes, from awake to bedtime each day, and I'd be so relaxed by the end of it lol. More like lazy, but still, I'd be completely destressed all the same.

And if you incorporate the fact that, at the end of the stressful week as well, others are using a different method with the same purpose -- they are partying in the way the word "partying" suggests to destress-- I, for one, find it strange and not so understandable.

I achieved the same goal with less effort. ._. -very confusing-

I love hanging out with my friends, but I don't "party". I hang out with them; there is a difference even if we can be loud and have a lot of fun too just like partiers.

It makes me worry when I think about it another way. Do some people not have a good de-stress plan or strategy? If doing something like that, to result in possibly being rude, disrespectful, obnoxious, loud, and literally out of their mind, is their only way of destressing, you can't blame me for feeling concerned o - o;;;. If it's the only way they know how to destress e _ e .... I see a problem. What's the professional name called? Therapist? Pshycologist? Sociologist? Physiologist? Whatever..ist? Something! Need to grab the right person, dang it! o __ o;;;

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Just because you're a child doesn't mean you have to act like a child.

Just because you're an adult doesn't mean you have to act like an adult because "there's no point being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes."

Just because you're a teenager doesn't mean you have to act like a teenager.

And lastly, just because you're a university/college student doesn't mean you have to party like a university/college student.

In high school, one year ago or 1+ years ago, the same people didn't do that anyway. Hanging out at peoples' houses or at a public place, like a mall or restaurant, in a group was already enough. Also, those are the same people who desired sleep in high school. And yet, a year or a few years later, they've transformed into suddenly nocturnal beings? And favoured partying above their previous "normal" methods?

They're completely different people and I don't quite understand. And I still won't. I'd rather not do research. -shrugs- I'm fine voicing my thoughts and leaving it at that. I think I may slightly enjoy being annoyed, and staying annoyed at this, lol. I apologize if I am ever out of line whenever I talk. I won't notice if I say something that means something else to the reader and unnecessary drama, conflicts, and problems will ensue sweatdrop

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orz The background picture fits me, the end! 8D;

I don't know how to explain @ ~ @
Guess what I mean for me ninja Please? > 3 <;;
You don't have to sweatdrop You can just leave it, lol. I know I am xD;;.


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Hmm. I wonder if anyone thought about anything of my profile.

I mean, no one has to! No one has to. It's just-- I don't know who looks at my profile and at what part, and what they think. I get no feedback, lol, and I feel very lost that way xD

Whether or not anyone would like to listen, I would like to talk about something, if no one minds ~ You can read if you want. I'd feel honored and flattered if you did, seeing you took time out of your busy schedule to ignite interest in yourself to read something mere Kiyori put together ~

For the following, I'm not randomly speaking. It's mention in a specific area on my page, but I'm not telling you where 8D N-No, don't go find where sweatdrop please. Not unless you have to. Or, well, I don't know which you should see first: the below explanation or the profile bit.

A certain accent and my personality are attracted to each other because they're, well, .... The air of the accent speaks of something that the accent and my personality have in common. (Edit: See 'Proper Lady' entry) As a result, my personality would gladly associate itself with the accent because they snugly fit together. (To avoid repetition of a previously spoken word, I put the word 'something' instead)

I love the refined quality of it.

(Side note: If a person has that accent (specifically sounding since it depends what dialect/place), I won't like the person only for their accent. What kind of person do you think I am? I'd be intrigued by the accent, love it to bits, but it's only the accent. The person, on the other hand, is another book to enjoy reading. No, hang on, let me rephrase that. It's like loving an object someone has. You may adore and admire it, but at the end of the day, who are you spending time with? You went to the person's house, or talked to the person online, for the person and not for what object they have that you love! (car, jewellery, clothes, kitchen, house style, game console, video game, sports equipment, high quality music equipment, or artist's materials like a tablet)

... I never had accent training. Cool thought but, like how I imagine singing lessons to be like, incredibly difficult, so I don't want to = =. Day in and day out pronouncing stuff. I would rather live somewhere and let it sink in - so much easier! And it helps I'm easily influenced so the accent stays with me like it's a normal thing.

But it's a good thing I don't live there or it wouldn't help me if both my personality AND location were appeared as "snobby" to people who don't know how to look at me. One out of two is already plenty trouble if it happens = u =;;;. (>, n> ;; <///3 )

I obtained said accent from watching one of favourite shows and it just comes to me C: Overtime, it has strengthened so it comes to me as often as I'd like but no one hears it lol. Currently, if I spend too much time by myself, and the accent pops up to decorate my words, my accent can bother me when I can't really stop xD;; o - o;;;;. My parents and sibling have heard it, but that was in the beginning, as acknowledgement/awareness, when I was briefly showing it to my dad, for the second time, and then I dropped it lol. After that, it was just me. No one gets to hear it xD;;;;.

I never speak in it to mock or show off because I speak it for fun, why not, and when I'm by myself. Especially when I'm by myself. When I don't notice, I always mumble in it and it doesn't necessarily stop unless I stop to think normally and think/talk in my normal voice. Even in my head, it'll be accented.

If not loudly spoken ("loudly" = loud enough for another person to hear) at a good volume, I will always mumble with the accent when alone, never any louder. ie: staring at the laptop and mumbling some words as I type lol. B-But not now! It didn't happen in this entry. Probably cause I'm tired and I just want to write and finish.

I seem to have trouble to use a higher volume. Even if it's just myself.

When I've wanted to show a friend, to see if it sounds okay or to just show them, as an example, that I can speak in some accent because I'm momentarily proud of myself, I'm usually unable to display it to them, much to my displeasure. The second someone's actually talking to me, be it via writing (ie: online), over the phone, or in person, I'm defaulted to my natural speaking voice.

It just happens.

(I am who I am too, so it's reasonable o3o)

I feel too shy to show it. It's like I'm on display o - e. Of course I'd freeze, lose my courage, and never let the person know I was recently going to try talking xD;;. And repeat that until I get some iota of nerve to squeak some words out.

= u =;; It sucks cause I'd want to show it to some friends, like if it's artwork I just made, but then I can't xD;;;. It's totally unnerving ~

-thought about it- Waah >///<. Even though you can't hear me, .. I can't do it. ;///__///;

Just the thought of it ..... ! gonk -OTLs in defeat-

-brushes off dirt from her dress, standing up- A-Anyways ... -coughs, looking the other way- That was all. That I wanted to say.

Umm ... -thinks- Yeah, I'm done! C:


Edit on May 19th, 2012: I mentioned the same thing to my friend a few weeks ago, explaining I wanted to but I couldn't, and she asked me, "Are you that scared?"

Huh o.o. I guess I am .. Hmm o ~ o Darn. I'm not one to be purposely vulnerable > >. Fine! I am scared. But I still try. It's nothing that could really bother me.





 
 
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