I don't know what to journal about today.
Gotta tell you, this journaling every day has gotta be helping my typing speed. Not that it matters, I don't have like an office job or anything, lol.
I always imagine that someone is reading these. I can't really believe it though. Like part of my brain says that there's always someone curious enough to see if they can dig up any dirt on you. Then another part of my brain says that no one is that desperate for entertainment to comb through boring journal entries in the hopes of maybe finding a juicy detail.
Which one is the truth though? I guess there's no way to truly know. But in the name of science (or whatever) I'm going to do a little experiment. If you came all the way here to dig up dirt and if you have endeavored to read this far into my journal, then clearly there is something about me that interests you. I can't imagine what, but anyway I will reward your diligence today.
I'm going to give you ALL the dirt. I mean not that it's super interesting, but here goes. I'm probably older than most Gaians. I get the feeling that the average age these days is somewhere in the 30s, though there are definitely younger people on here as well. I am in my early 40s and that is somewhat embarrassing to say, but I've always been a late bloomer anyway, so whatever.
Next, I'm married and I have been for over 20 years. We got married very young and he is my favorite person on the planet. We are weird in many of the same ways and have grown to accept the ways that we are different. If you want to give me a subtle sign that you have read this, you can call him Hunter. I usually just refer to him as "my husband" or "my hubby" for short.
This next one may be a big shocker, but I have two kids. I mean, I'm married and in my 40s so this really shouldn't be a huge plot-twist. They are both in their teens and pretty independent, so I have more free time than when they were small. This likely accounts for most of my hiatus, as I was busy running around after them for many years.
The next one might be the biggest shocker of all! Idk, maybe not, but seriously if you have read this far then yeah I'm going to tell you everything. I am a Christian, I faithfully go to church twice a week and believe in the Holy Spirit. Having said that, I do NOT believe that Christians should force their beliefs on others, or try to make others live by the standards in the Bible. God gave us free will. I have chosen to believe and will do what that choice entails. Anyone who has not made that choice should not have to follow our rules. If you, dear reader, live in a different way than me, I am not here to judge or condemn you. I would be lying if I said that I don't want you to go to Heaven, but I can't make that choice for you and I can't force you to believe the same way that I do.
Your life is yours to live. I believe in God, and I believe He gave us free will. What you do with that free will is your choice alone. If you are curious and have questions, then yes I will be happy to talk about the choice that I made, but I don't like unsolicited advice anymore than the next person. I will not be a religion "car salesman" and try to coerce you into anything.
I know that I don't have everything right. I'm aware that I might have the wrong answers. I'm just always trying to do the best that I can. I have ADHD and I highly suspect that I am autistic as well. This means that I can't do everything in the same way as most people. Maybe this is why it's easier for me to think about being in other peoples' shoes, because I've been doing that my whole life. Trying to understand what makes me different and why I don't do or say the same thing as other people.
This journal became quite an essay today. If by some slim chance, someone actually read this whole thing, I salute you. You are a trooper and deserve respect, lol. You have my love and admiration for caring this much. I hope that I did not offend you in any way and please send me a message if you have any questions.
TL;DR//// I'm a terrible person and you should probably stop being friends with me. /s wink
ShiroOkazaki Community Member 
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