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	the life we hold before us, is more important then the sorrows we have had in the past "with the limited resources we have on this planet, we should not be fighting...but this will continue and humanity is lost. But no matter what ill fate deals us, if we are alive we will have hope"

	football journal one back
	football journal one back


sighs I've for so long have push an image of hating christians, of disproving so much of everything that they do and laughing at there belief. but i was wrong, i am wrong. I'm realizing that what i have become is an image of a religious basher...that i have hurt and made fun of friends...peers....adults...and the one closest to my own heart. All won't believe me and i don't know if i'd believe myself, if i came saying this I have disliked and showed my distaste for christians that have pushed away and hated my religion for no real reason, they never understood it and constantly make fun of it. they use stupid movies and idiotic images of witchs ugly as hell flying around on a broom....they took my faith and bashed everything there was about it..... but i took it as every single one is like that, and i was dead wrong. I fully noticed the horrible image i have put out in two occasions...one when my own girl friend was deafly afraid to mention the christian camp she went to and shuddered and breathed heavily when i finally got her to talk about it....in my eyes, she was so scared of my bashing what she felt so strongly about, or i'd laugh at it...another happened just yesterday and this also struck me hard.It did so because i really have started to not think the way that i have put out. i said that i didn''t believe that everyone is like that (when we had seen two people screaming into a microphone about how we are going to hell) and she said "right" in the way that made my heart sink and ach...she thought that I thought everyone did that, that i didn't make a difference between the good normal christians and the ones that made a horrible name of them. I guess this, saying all this means nothing..and the only way I can prove that i REALLY have seen my fault and i am trying to fix my wrongs..is by showing actions of it. I'm so sorry....to my friends that are christian...and my girl friend, even though you don't say it....i realized I have hurt you a lot cry thats all I can say right now, bye Affliction of the mind · Sun Sep 10, 2006 @ 03:47pm · 1 Comments


Affliction of the mind Community Member «Prev \| Next» Archive \| Home [01/04/09 10:04am] [08/18/08 08:35pm] [08/15/08 05:04pm] [07/19/08 04:38am] [05/12/08 09:01pm] [05/07/08 03:11am] [05/01/08 03:30am] [04/14/08 04:13pm] [03/10/08 04:30am] [02/27/08 04:46am]

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	Dont hate yourself Matthew. You said to me that you were afraid that this is you, that you are a monster. You are not a monster, you could have been but chose not to be. You could have been like Nick Stapleton, turned out exactly like the ones before you, turned into the foul thing you were raised with. But did you? No. You are not horrible matthew. You are the most wonderful person ive ever met. Youre understanding, your kind, youre sweet and intelligent. Youre hardowrking, dependable, and responsible. Youre loyal, friendly, and loving. Youre one of a kind. You are absolutly everything a man should be, and yes to me you qualify as a man I dont care if youre not even old enough to vote yet. Many "men" of our society are scumy lazy and selfish bastards, more worthy of the title "baby" than Man. You are nothing like that Remember that picture I gave you, the one I took on the orchestra trip? That picture to me, is the best picture of you ever taken. Because thats how ive always seen you, Matthew. Full of light. Not that you want to hear any of this from ME, fine ive accepted that, but im telling you anyway. Yes, you made this mistake. But you know you were wrong, you can admit that. You see now that you messed up, and youve changed. So many people cannot face up to themselves, cannot face up their mistakes and just admit they are wrong....much less try and improve themselves upon it. You say youre sorry, and I for one forgive you. because you will and have changed, you learn from youre mistakes and make yourself a better person. You already are a wonderful person. If people like you do not inherit the Earth, then we are damned beyond belief. You deserve life and all the happyness it brings more than anything. I do not say this because I loved you. Rather it is WHY. Offline Indigo_rose_daela · Community Member · Sun Sep 10, 2006 @ 04:09pm

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"There are no morals in politics; there is only expedience. A scoundrel may be of use to us just because he is a scoundrel."
-Vladimir Lenin
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