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I. Am. So. Tired. Of. This. Site.
I've been dreading coming back for a while, now, which explains why I haven't been very 'present'. I can't wait until Friday, because after that I'll be officially too busy with this site and won't have to deal with any of the s**t on here.
I know people might want me to stay, but I'm not sure I can anymore. Whenever I come back, I manage to find one thing to stay for, one thread that made it fun, one person who made my day, and though I'm surrounded by those people, I'm also surrounded by idiots I DON'T want to see. I've wasted so much time and effort on this site when I could've been doing something else. When I could've been writing, or drawing, or reading, or talking to my friends on the phone.
I came on here today and I had 14 PMs from different people I know. I have more in my Outbox that I haven't answered, and 46 friends, though a lot of the PMs seem to come from gray names I haven't quite managed to turn blue yet. I have some influence on Gaia, people know my name, but I'm sick of trying to be cool and mean something on here. I want to be popular, but I don't. Why do I care so much about what somebody in Australia thinks about me? Sure, they may be cool, but I'll never meet them, and I'll never be that close to them. I just don't get close to people, not anymore. I keep distancing myself because I want to express myself through art and writing, I have people visiting my site to view this, some people I'm not even sure I know. Shouldn't I focus on giving them a piece of me like I promised instead of putting off drawing because of some site?
I'm tired of the people on here. There's the people PMing me constantly asking to cyber. I won't cyber with you and I don't want to. I'm 14. I have no desire to be possessed by some random pervert 4,000 miles away. So stop it and go away. Then there's the self-centered pricks in the Chatterbox, making their own threads because they're so cool, but it doesn't matter if they're all alone, they won't reply to you if you post and you're not their friend. Grow up and ******** talk to someone and people might actually like you and not just socialize with you because they think that if they do they'll be popular. Of course, then there's the n00bs, who make the most retarded threads, so that even if there's a good thread, you can't find it, much less post on it. It's so rare for me to find a good thread these days. Then the mods seem to be getting assholish and prudish and won't get rid of the threads that clearly need to go, but get mad at people who make those trolling threads that are so fun. I understand that they don't like them and they're wrong, but can't you also stop the threads where people encourage others to cyber via PMs? Or to do crude acts borderlining sex? Jesus Christ, get it sorted out. Why do you think people troll?
There are reasons to stay. My friends and the occasional good thread seem good enough, but if I can have my friends email me, and I go for days without finding a good thread, why stay on here? Why feel guilty because I don't want to come on and be here? Every day I used to come home from school and get on Gaia for a year. I met monsters that I pray to God I never meet the likes of again, I have to be confidence for people who can't see how great they are because they're so depressed about being themselves. I meet people who mutilate themselves because of their looks, as if scarring yourself will help make you beautiful. Why do people care so much? Why can't anyone just grow up and realize that you have to change something if you want to be something your not? If you want beauty so bad, go and get the damn plastic surgery, but don't moan and complain about how you wish you could be pretty, because even if you're the ugliest person in the world, some expression you make will make you the most beautiful creature someone's seen. I gaurantee it. Just because you're not pretty with that grimace on your face doesn't mean a smile won't brighten things up. I admit that I'm quite pretty, but I can look horrendous, and I don't care. If you want to be skinny, you have to at first accept that you're either:
A. unable to lose weight because of your body type
B. eating badly and excercising poorly
and then change it. Movie stars don't get skinny over night. And I know a lot of people who are pretty and pudgy.
THOSE ARE NOT EXCUSES TO HURT YOURSELF.
Maybe I'm going over the top, but all these things consistantly bother me with this site. I've seen so many people with emotional problems it makes me sick. If people don't like you, you're not looking hard enough or you're being a b***h, if people call you a n00b, obviously you can't spell for s**t and should get a brain and learn that typing correctly not only makes you look smarter, but will get you more influence and popularity. It's harder to do that when you typ lyk diz.
There are also people who brag about themselves. 'im a curtified genyus. ppl proved it' Well, honey, I guess because I'm 99th percentile I'm so below you. If you can't type correctly and blame it on laziness, you're not a genius. You're just a wannabe.
I keep seeing these people again and again and again and I keep getting ignored by people who I think are genuinely interesting or flamed by people who can't type. And people wonder what's happening to Gaia? Everyone's so full of it it's going to explode. Everyone needs their own thread or everyone needs a bf/gf online. WHY? Nothing's fun anymore and it all just drives me into rants. I want to quit. I'm sure that at least one person is going to try and convince me to stay, and maybe I will, but what for? I don't feel like being on here at all.
If you're a friend of mine and you want to contact me outside of Gaia, start by emailing nightbanisher@yahoo.com . I'm super paranoid about giving out my real email address, now, so I'm terribly sorry. I'll refer you to my real one once you contact me there. I hope I can keep many of my friends, but I just can't keep coming to this site and feeling like s**t. It's just not working.
I've been dreading coming back for a while, now, which explains why I haven't been very 'present'. I can't wait until Friday, because after that I'll be officially too busy with this site and won't have to deal with any of the s**t on here.
I know people might want me to stay, but I'm not sure I can anymore. Whenever I come back, I manage to find one thing to stay for, one thread that made it fun, one person who made my day, and though I'm surrounded by those people, I'm also surrounded by idiots I DON'T want to see. I've wasted so much time and effort on this site when I could've been doing something else. When I could've been writing, or drawing, or reading, or talking to my friends on the phone.
I came on here today and I had 14 PMs from different people I know. I have more in my Outbox that I haven't answered, and 46 friends, though a lot of the PMs seem to come from gray names I haven't quite managed to turn blue yet. I have some influence on Gaia, people know my name, but I'm sick of trying to be cool and mean something on here. I want to be popular, but I don't. Why do I care so much about what somebody in Australia thinks about me? Sure, they may be cool, but I'll never meet them, and I'll never be that close to them. I just don't get close to people, not anymore. I keep distancing myself because I want to express myself through art and writing, I have people visiting my site to view this, some people I'm not even sure I know. Shouldn't I focus on giving them a piece of me like I promised instead of putting off drawing because of some site?
I'm tired of the people on here. There's the people PMing me constantly asking to cyber. I won't cyber with you and I don't want to. I'm 14. I have no desire to be possessed by some random pervert 4,000 miles away. So stop it and go away. Then there's the self-centered pricks in the Chatterbox, making their own threads because they're so cool, but it doesn't matter if they're all alone, they won't reply to you if you post and you're not their friend. Grow up and ******** talk to someone and people might actually like you and not just socialize with you because they think that if they do they'll be popular. Of course, then there's the n00bs, who make the most retarded threads, so that even if there's a good thread, you can't find it, much less post on it. It's so rare for me to find a good thread these days. Then the mods seem to be getting assholish and prudish and won't get rid of the threads that clearly need to go, but get mad at people who make those trolling threads that are so fun. I understand that they don't like them and they're wrong, but can't you also stop the threads where people encourage others to cyber via PMs? Or to do crude acts borderlining sex? Jesus Christ, get it sorted out. Why do you think people troll?
There are reasons to stay. My friends and the occasional good thread seem good enough, but if I can have my friends email me, and I go for days without finding a good thread, why stay on here? Why feel guilty because I don't want to come on and be here? Every day I used to come home from school and get on Gaia for a year. I met monsters that I pray to God I never meet the likes of again, I have to be confidence for people who can't see how great they are because they're so depressed about being themselves. I meet people who mutilate themselves because of their looks, as if scarring yourself will help make you beautiful. Why do people care so much? Why can't anyone just grow up and realize that you have to change something if you want to be something your not? If you want beauty so bad, go and get the damn plastic surgery, but don't moan and complain about how you wish you could be pretty, because even if you're the ugliest person in the world, some expression you make will make you the most beautiful creature someone's seen. I gaurantee it. Just because you're not pretty with that grimace on your face doesn't mean a smile won't brighten things up. I admit that I'm quite pretty, but I can look horrendous, and I don't care. If you want to be skinny, you have to at first accept that you're either:
A. unable to lose weight because of your body type
B. eating badly and excercising poorly
and then change it. Movie stars don't get skinny over night. And I know a lot of people who are pretty and pudgy.
THOSE ARE NOT EXCUSES TO HURT YOURSELF.
Maybe I'm going over the top, but all these things consistantly bother me with this site. I've seen so many people with emotional problems it makes me sick. If people don't like you, you're not looking hard enough or you're being a b***h, if people call you a n00b, obviously you can't spell for s**t and should get a brain and learn that typing correctly not only makes you look smarter, but will get you more influence and popularity. It's harder to do that when you typ lyk diz.
There are also people who brag about themselves. 'im a curtified genyus. ppl proved it' Well, honey, I guess because I'm 99th percentile I'm so below you. If you can't type correctly and blame it on laziness, you're not a genius. You're just a wannabe.
I keep seeing these people again and again and again and I keep getting ignored by people who I think are genuinely interesting or flamed by people who can't type. And people wonder what's happening to Gaia? Everyone's so full of it it's going to explode. Everyone needs their own thread or everyone needs a bf/gf online. WHY? Nothing's fun anymore and it all just drives me into rants. I want to quit. I'm sure that at least one person is going to try and convince me to stay, and maybe I will, but what for? I don't feel like being on here at all.
If you're a friend of mine and you want to contact me outside of Gaia, start by emailing nightbanisher@yahoo.com . I'm super paranoid about giving out my real email address, now, so I'm terribly sorry. I'll refer you to my real one once you contact me there. I hope I can keep many of my friends, but I just can't keep coming to this site and feeling like s**t. It's just not working.
I found this in a girls journal I was hoping to talk to but found out that she hasn't signed on for about a year. when I read this I realized that 100% of everything she said was true not only to her but to me too. my relationship with gaia is a love/hate one. I've decided instead of trying to be on every waking moment. I'm going to be on ALOT less. I'll still come on to chat guys so don't worry. Love you all!
-Tessa.
Community Member