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Ecstacy
You're the antidote that gets me by
Something strong like a drug that gets me high
He was just another kid. Not cool, not good looking, not smart, not atheletic. There was nothing special about him.
He had a typical life. His mother abusuive, she didn't love him like she should. His mother was pregant when she was 16 and wasn't ready to take care of a child. She was a big time smoker, it relieved her stress but it also poisinsed her child.
He tries to please people who he thinks are better than him, and that means everyone. He can never make anyone proud, no matter how hard he tries. He is so nice though. He trys to be helpful but he gets in the way, he tries to be nice but no one cares, he tries to love but no one loves him back. He think he's worthless because everyone says he is. He hasn't done wrong to anyone though, but they all hate him because he's a good person. He's so young and innocent, he doesn't deserve to feel the way people make him feel.
He goes to school knowing no one cares, that no one will bother to say hi to him. It's funny how people will hate you just because your different or believe differently than them. He is failing in his grades even though he is trying his best. Because of the alcohal his mother drank when she was pregnant with him, he has learning issues and to top that off he has ADHD. It's not his fault, bad parents are the product of hurt children.
The boys at school are cruel to him because they are better at athletics and acedemics than him. He is a bit feminine so people underestimate him. He lets people do whatever they want to him because he is too scared or too weak to stop them. People take advantage of him all the time.
He feel so lonely becuase he has no friends. I guess sometimes life turnes out like that for some people. Some are born unlucky and there is nothing they can do about it.
He crys, he crys over little things but he keeps the serious pain all tucked up inside. He smiles even though he's dieing on the inside. He is always smiling and happy even though his life is falling apart.
What do I think? He's beautiful but no one will ever love him.
What I really meant to say was I'm sorry for the way I've been
I never meant to be so cold
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I heard screaming, it sounded like a girl. Probably a very young girl. Girls screamed over the littest things so I didn't pay much mind to it. My best friend Kore, on the other hand, did take mind to it. He looked at me quizically. I shurgged, not wanting to bother with anyone at the moment. We were just hanging out behind some shops, talking and planning things that we wanted to do.
"You know....there aren't too many little kids around here..." He started, letting the sentence linger, "In fact, the only kid around here is Menekko's kid." He said, referring to the young lady that lived on thier street. Kore was right, her kid, though I had never seen him, or her, was the only one on the street, we knew that from gossip.
"What are you getting at?" I asked.
He kept a straight face, as he always did, in any situation,
"Maybe if we help her kid we can gain her favor. I think he's pretty hot..."
"For God's sake, you're only fifteen!" I said. Menekko was twenty-six, she got pregnant in high school, the father of her child didn't want marriage, so the two of them droped out of school and lived on thier own. They had been bad parents, teachers say so and other mothers around the neighboor do, even though everyone in this neighboorhod was pretty much a bad parent. Mine for example, were divorced, I'm stuck with my dad while my brother, whom I never really cared much about, went with my mother.
Kore got up, as did I.
"Maybe it's those collage kids again. Wouldn't it be great to beat them up? We could definatly take them on."
Kore and I were tough, we were just that way. People kept away from us too, because out dark apperence. We dressed in all black all the time, chains and hoddies some times, wrist bands and such. Some people considered us emo or whatever the newest thing was. I wasn't emo, I just didn't like many people.
Kore started walking out of the little alley we were in. I had no idea where he was going, but he knew certain things that many people think. He could tell what would happen before it did, he had a way of knowing where to go and what was going on. He had some kind of mental gift.
We heard talking and whimpering.
"It's not the collage kids." Kore said. I didn't care either way. We snunk behind a building and syped apon the scene. A group of idiots, about the same age as myself and Kore, were stading, facing a wall, they seemed to be talking and laughing, cruelly of course.
Kore slowly walked towards them. I followed. There were two guys and a girl, we could take them. We would beat up the guys if we had too.
"What's wrong sweetie? Are you lost?" One of the guys said teasingly.
Kore looked at me,
"Menekko has a male child."
I shrugged, thats what I did when I didn't know what to say, or if I didn't want to talk.
"Let's leave him alone okay?" The girl said nervously, obviosuly she had to get the two guys to agree with her before she left.
"Why? Menekko doesn't care about him." Everyone knew who Menekko was, it was a small town and everyone knew everything about everyone else.
"Mommy does care..." The boy whimpered.
Kore turned to me and nodded, signaling that we should make a move.
"Since when did picking on kids become a hobby for idiots?" Kore asked, as calm and cool as ever. He never showed much emotion, I didn't either but my voice always sounded a little cold.
The three turned. The girl looked over at the two men nervously,
"I never we should have never done this."
"Don't worry about it Keiko." A man with black hair said. He turned to Kore and me, "Menekko said we could."
"What do you mean by that?" Kore asked.
"We were just going to ask him to do something for us, Menekko said we could do that."
"They were gonna make me get money for them." The little boy sniffled.
"You were going to make him steal something?" Kore asked.
"Well, not really...."
"He was..." The boy said.
"Shut up." The other guy said to him. The kid whimpered.
"Beat it before you get hurt." Kore said.
"Come on." Keiko said, turning to walk away.
"He really isn't worth all this trouble..." The other man said. The blacked haired man sighed,
"You're right." Before walking away he pushed the boy to the ground and smirked, "Have a nice day Es."
The little boy started crying again. Kore stood there until the three left. I felt a little sorry for the kid. I walked over to him,
"Are you okay?" I asked, bending down on one knee. He didn't say anything. I looked at Kore for help. Obviously Kore didn't care about comforting him. That's what was so odd with Kore, one minute he's caring the next he's hateful.
"I don't think he's good news." Kore said plainly.
"Why, other than the fact he has a stupid name?" I said in Japanese. The kid cried harder, did he know what I was saying?
I placed my hand on his back,
"I won't hurt you." I said softly, trying to sound as nice as I could. He looked up at me. His bangs were just barely covering his right eye. The kid had dark black hair and a beutiful, big, blue eye. He looked like he was 8.
His face was red from crying and tears still hung in his eyes,
"You not mean?" He asked weakly.
"No, I'm nice." I said, rubbing his back and trying to comfort him. What he did next shocked him. He hugged me. I guess it was typical for little kids to do, but he didn't even know me.
Kore snickered, but I stayed frozen. The kid looked up at me. He no longer had the look of sadness painted on his face, he was smiling. He had the look of genuine happiness.
"Will you be my friend?" He asked.
I smiled. It seemed so long since I smiled.
"Oh course I will."
I could imagine Kore's jaw dropping in disbelif. I was shocked myself. I had never cared about anyone, let alone a kid I just met. Why now? Why him?
I noticed he had marking and bruises on his arms.
"Did they hit you?" I asked.
"They pushed me." He said, recalling what happened a few moments ago.
"Where did you get those marking?" I said, looking at his arm.
"Markings?" He asked, tilting his head to the side. He look cute when he did that. I pointed to his arm.
"Who did that to you?"
He looked me, seruous now. He didn't look very serious, but I could tell me was.
"Mommy."
We tried to leave, but he follwed us around. We walked around town, not doing anything in particular. I noticed something about Es though. He was talking the whole time, wouldn't be quiet. Kore for annoyed, I had to stop him from yelling at the kid. Es talked about the starngest things, such as cars he saw, lights, food, and other random, meaningles things. I thought it was pretty cute, little kids were interesting. I found out he was ten, which wasn't exactly little, but I was 15. Kore told me he thought Es had some kind of disability, or something like that. He said something about ADHD. I didn't know much about ADHD, but I knew people made a big deal about ADD so how bad was ADHD?
The kid was ful of energy, jumping around places ad running. He tripped a couple times. He cried easily but he got over it fast.
Night hit and we were still outside. Es got cold so I bought him a coat. For some reason Kore didn't like Es too much. I'd have to admit, he was annoying at times. I didn't want to take him to his house, I knew his mother wasn't there, she hardly ever was. He'd be spending the night all alone, again. He almost cried when we left. Poor kid. I told him I would be back tomarrow, he said we were his only friends. I felt sorry for him, why would people hate him so much?
Days and days went by. I would always go to his house to he would stay with me for the whole day. I was embarassed at first, what would people think of me if I had a kid following me everywhere? I got used to it because now I thought of Es as my brother.
I haven't heard from Kore much. Is it because Es? I couldn't just leave Es though, he needed me, unlike Kore did.
After awhile I realized that his mother didn't hit him as much because he was never around enough to get in trouble. I also learned he was failing in school. The kid was in 3rd grade, he failed a grade once. I was able to help him out with that. I also helped him with other things, like teaching him responsibility and learning to do chores. His mother never could afford to buy him medical help for his ADHD, so I had to cope with that, but I got used to it.
Before long he became my best friend. His ADHD wasn't so bad, now that he was getting older and all. He seemed to be doing better in school also. Things were looking. Kore had started talking to me again. No we both were Es' best friends. On the downside, the kids at school got meaner, so that meant Kore and I had to protect Es better. Es never stuck up for himself. He was so innocent. I was getting older myself. I was eighteen now, and all guys my age had a girlfriend or boyfriend. I didn't. I didn't care much for love like that, it was a waste of time. I loved Es though, but I loved him like a brother, and thats what he told everyone new he meet. He said Kore was his cousin. No one believed his though, he looked nothing at all like me. I was good looking, Es wasn't ugly, he just wasn't, it's just that no one thought he was, "hot". My real brother reminded me of Es though, they were oth kind of whimpy and not very masculen, maybe thats why I liked Es so much. I never really got to know David, my real brother, before the divorce. I wished that maybe I could have had a better family. My family was cruel, they didn't help me. No one did. I had no one to love, and thats what I wanted so bad. No family, no friends, nothing. My life was pretty bad, until I met Kore and Es. Now that I am not so depressed anymore I might start getting ito religion, Kore is. It's some type of Wiccan religion, it's look intersting. All other religion were about following rules, this one had some fun in it.
I thought today was going to be a normal day. I walked down the sidewalks in the fog. It was a little cold so I brought my hooded sweatshirt. I stoped at Es' house. His mothers car was gone. It had been gone for a long time, and I never heard Es say anything about his mom. I wondered where she could be.
Es was usually sitting on the porch, waiting for me. Today he wasn't. That didn't matter much to me. I knocked on the door and waited. Five minutes passed and I rang the doorbell. No answer. Then I knocked as hard as I could. Ten minutes...no answer. I started to worry, like a parent would worry over thier children. I had an idea, just to look in the house. It wouldn't be breaking in, I wouldn't ruin or steal anything...The door was unlocked so I walked in.
If you thought the outside of the house was bad, which it was, the inside was even worse. It literally looked like a trash dump. Paper, magazines, newpapers, food bags, spilt soda bottles, beer cans, old ciggarettes and new cigarette packs were scattered everywhere. I had to be careful just walking in there. The place reked off cigarette smoke. Es didn't deserve to live like this, no one did.
"Es?" I called, loud enough for him to hear him. No answer. I ran thourgh the house, looking everywhere. He wasn't there, at all. I was getting hot from worrying too much. I toke a deep breath and calmed down. That let me get an idea. Es, Kore and I set up a spot where we would go no matter what happened. No matter what happened, if it was bad you stayed there and waited for the others to come. Es was probably there, because there was no other place he would be. I toke off as fast as I could to the park where out "meeting" place was at, fearing the worse.
Only a few more meters and I would be there. I Ran thought the forest, my heart pounding like a drum. I jumped over a creek and into a pile of bushes, where our hideout was conciled behind. I looked around. Es wasn't there.
Notes: Sorry if it seemed breif, it is kind of like the prologue so thats why. I type soo much I am too lazy to write the rest tonight >< Hope you enjoyed!
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