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Well I believe my paths are pretty much clear at this point in time.
Currently the knowledge that I have about both paths are enough to survive them.
However when it comes to the sense of being lonely I am not afraid.
Dedication speaks louder than anything.
My two paths that lye before me are both filled with battles
Currently I train for them and for the challenges that I foresee
I am almost certain however that both lead me to almost certain demise
Hence my reason for training

I feel as if I am being hypocritical
I do not know my own desires any more
Whether they be good or evil
Both seem pleasurable
I want to do good and be a righteous person
However everything I try to do is in error
Being righteous does nothing for me but cause more anguish
This anguish turns into hate
My hate is at a point where all my morals are decaying away
To a point where I can no longer direct my flow of energy
Meaning I will strike down friend/foe
There is no one person to blame for this but myself
I no longer have the ability to view society higher than the ground I tread upon
For this I have allowed myself to be weak
I do feel sorrow for those few who are good in the world
I a person who used to be righteous will now become what I hated most
In doing so I will fight fire with fire once more
Deja Vu all over again.....
Been six years but the past always come back in the end I suppose...