you know what the weird thing is? The weird thing is he is there for me when i have a problem but not when im ok... should i be complaining? i know he tries but i just cant help feeling like this. Its like a roller coaster im up and i feel him been so loving and sometimes romantic, cute and just there, he remembers dates he is interested in whatever i dom he is perfect. But then everything goes away and down the hill with me, i feel he is so cold that he is not in a good mood or that he just doesnt care about anything... doesnt care if we spend time together or not, he forgets about me and it all hurts. I dont know if i just over do it maybe i do (probably i do) but i feel it and when i feel like that i tend to move away. And when im ready to tell him i feel bad or that im angry he just says something, it might be tiny but it gets to me and he gets everything he wants from me without me even noticing and then up to the clouds again.
Maybe the distance is finally getting to me.... maybe i am just needing him more i dont know i just know this is not a happy feeling.
Well enough of that... as for everything else im doin ok in college projects are pilling up meh but im working on it, i need to get A's on all my classes and im only working hard on one i got a B but all the others are been perfect!! and well Scholarship is coming soon im saving... yeah im still saving and for the first time in my whole life its goin well!! lol
when i get my scholarship in 7 days ill save some more up so i can get to 1k soon yay!! anyway well i guess im gonna go to sleep its late even tho i couldnt sleep i still hav to try... when you miss a night you can never recover it!!! but oh well
ah by the way i got a haircut, and fixed my hair nothing rad just same as always i just thought i could say it here after all this is my journal right???
well im leaving Later days!
Mood: emo
