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Dear Diary,

September has been an interesting month. It started out normal enough when my mother sent me out with a basketful of strawberry jam to take to my grandmother’s house. I took my usual path through the woods, stopping to pick flowers along the way, when I was shanghaied by pirates!

I was put to work right away as cabin boy (I never did find out what happened to the last one). Captain Rottentooth gave me the evil eye when I brought his breakfast that first day, but after he tasted the strawberry jam I put on his bread and discovered I had six more jars of it, he warmed right up! Who knew his real name was Captain Sweet-tooth? Over tea and cakes the captain confided in me that we were sailing to a treasure island. He even showed me the map and sure enough there was a great big X marking the spot.

Over the next few days I worked my way through the ranks and made first mate. An easy accomplishment considering it was just me, the captain, and his parrot in a rowboat after the crew mutinied. As luck would have it our boat ran aground on the very isle we had been searching for. Using the captain’s eye patch as a miniature shovel I dug up the buried treasure box. We used it to barter our way back onto the ship by promising to split the gold evenly among the crew. As acting first mate, Captain Rottentooth entrusted me with the key.

That night while the crew slept (after passing out from drinking too much grog), I opened the treasure box and took as much as I could carry. I escaped by lashing two sea turtles together and rode them to shore. Once on land I used the gold to buy an airship and promoted myself to captain.