colorblue] Well, it's been 2 days since the mark of my Mother's 3rd year of her death. Nothing makes it easier. The pain has lessened a lot, but it's still going to be a long road to recovery. In time though, I'm sure that the pain will go away and her memory will be a wonderful one. My mother was my mom, my sister, my best friend, my hero, my everything. Losing her was the last thing I expected. I mean, I knew she was going to go eventually, we all do, but I did not intend on losing her so fast. I hadn't even been home 2 years before she passed away. August 8, 2007 would have been 2 years. My mom died 22 days before my son's 1st birthday. July 2, 2007. I will never forget that day. Sure, it takes a lot out of me to be strong for my son, but I'm really the only person he has other than my fiance, his step-father. Things haven't been the same, and probably never will be, but I'm trying so hard to make things work out. At times I feel like I'm losing Chris.. but then we always come around. Am I going to have to keep second guessing my relationship with him, or are things really going to be okay? I've always considered myself a strong girl, who grew into an even stronger woman. Sometimes, though, I doubt myself. I doubt myself in giving up my Christianity. Now I see that maybe I shouldn't have, regardless what people may think of me. I now know that some things and choice I've made in the past weren't the best ones, but I've learned from my mistakes. I hope things turn out alright in the end. Chris may not be the one for me, or he may be the one for me, one thing's for sure, I love that man with all my heart. My son, he's my world. IF I have to sacrifice my love life for my son, I'd do it in a heartbeat. I love Chris, but my child comes before any relationship with a man. I hope things get better in time. And I hope I see my best friend again soon. I miss him. He's like another older brother I never had. He's a wonderful friend to Chris. A best friend. I don't want Chris to lose that.[/color=blue]
emoxXxgurlxXx Community Member 
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