• The Day Mario Fell Into A Well

    Part I

    One day Hip and Hop were walking to the Koopa Mart to buy some antiseptic for King Koopa, whose head had been partially blown off by one of Kooky’s inventions. They were about halfway there when a blindfolded Mario stumbled right up to them.

    “Hop! Look, there’s Mario, walking around blindfolded!” Hip shouted, before Hop had a chance to punch him in the mouth and keep him quiet.

    When Mario heard them, he yelled out “Hey, Koopa Twins! I know you’re there! I also know it was you brats who switched Luigi’s entire wardrobe with limburger cheese, and you’re not gonna get away with it. Not this time! I’m on my way to Kastle Koopa right now to raid your fridge and mess with your plumbing!” And with that he broke out into a run, headed towards Kastle Koopa. He didn’t get far, because after a few moments he tripped and fell into a well.

    “Don’t worry, Mario, we’ll-“ began Hop.

    “--get you out!” Hip finished. After laughing uncontrollably for about three minutes, they turned around and ran back to Kastle Koopa.

    Part II

    As they entered the throne room, Hip and Hop noticed that their dad was sitting on his throne as usual, and two Boomerang Brother medics were trying to put some kind of tourniquet on his head. “Aah! Get away from me with that thing, both of you! Guards! Guards! Help!!”

    “Hey, Dad! Mario fell into a well! Is it okay if we torture him and stuff?” Hop asked, unperturbed by circumstance.

    “Kids! Don’t bother me right now. Can’t you see I’m fighting for my life?? -- You maniacs, don’t come near me! Get away !!” Dad yelled while fending off the medics with a spray bottle of water.

    “I…guess that’s a yes, you think?” Hip asked his brother, whispering.
    “Might as well be,” Hop replied, and with that they slowly backed out of the room and headed back to the well.

    Part III

    “Oh, Mario…” Hip said as we peered into the well.

    “We’ve got a few surprises for you,” Hop finished.
    “Did’ya bring me some rope?” asked the plumbre.

    “Not a chance!” they both said.

    “Oh, pasta! Now I’ll never get me flossin’ done…” grumbled Mario. They tossed a few ptooies into the well. After listening for about a minute, they began to wonder why there were no screams of agonising pain. Then there was a loud BURP.

    “What, is Yoshi down there too?” they both wondered aloud.
    “I’ve had better,” yelled Mario.

    “Um…throw more things in!” suggested Hip.

    With that they began tossing dozens of bob-ombs into the well. But when they exploded, they caused no harm to Mario, as they were not able to penetrate his thick hide. After a few hours, Hip and Hop exhausted their aresenal, and sat down to regroup.

    "I'm beginning to think that King Dad's not such a moron after all...Mario is hard to defeat," said Hip.

    "Hey, I've got an idea! I know what'll scare him real good, Hip!" exclaimed Hop. He grabbed a plastic bottle out of his bag o' torture things and tossed it into the well. "Ahem...It rubs the lotion on its skin!!!" he yelled down.

    "What?" said Mario. "I can't hear you, I've got too much pasta in my ears."

    "Shut up, Mario! I said, IT RUBS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN!!!"

    "Oh..." said Mario. "Okeydokey." After putting a bit on his arms, he exclaimed, "My lucky stars! So soft and smooth! Thanks, guys!!"

    "Well, that didn't work," said Hip. "Whatever you were trying to do..."

    "Argh!!" yelled Hop. "That's it, Mario, I'm coming down there to snap your neck myself!" He jumped into the well and started punching Mario in the head, to no effect.

    "Skull..so thick...can't...reach brain!" Hop said exhausted.

    "Hey, I'm gonna go play Ecco the Dolphin 2," said Hip, walking away from the well.

    ""Don't go-!" started Hop, but it was too late. His brother had already gone.

    "Hi..." said Mario, slowly turning his head to face Hop...

    THE END .........