• Desire: a common human emotion. An emotion that gives one the feeling of longing…wanting…needing. An emotion such as this brought out the ugliest in people; in brought the ugliest out of Kaiser. Kaiser Seide had no time for such useless feelings desire. He focused on himself and craved only for the things he needed to survive successfully in this world. He had been content with the way he lived his life. Alas, all emotions felt by humans are felt only out of instinct; a human instinct that could not be tolerated or ignored. This unstoppable urge could be triggered by the slightest of things. In kaiser’s case, his evoker hadn’t shown its face yet.

    It was a boy that sparked that animalistic urge in him. From the moment his eyes captured a glimpse of him. Kaiser’s fate was sealed, then.

    It was morning. Kaiser had casually walked into the poorly-maintained classroom. His blonde, curly hair bounced against his shoulders with every mood he made. Welcomed by a warm wave of hellos, he responded as necessary and sat at his desk. Kaiser had always been so cold to everyone; even he didn’t know why everybody was so friendly to him.

    Kaiser had never been good at drowning out the noise around him. A slight feeling of annoyance tugged at kaiser’s being. He tried to ignore it all by reading through his English book, but it was impossible to even concentrate. Everybody was so loud. A rough estimate of twenty and some odd kids were all talking at the same time, each one desperately trying to be heard over everybody else. To Kaiser, the sound of loud, indistinct conversation dulled into an incessant buzz that annoyed him to the point of cold anger. He waited anxiously for that bell to ring. It was only then that the class would quiet down and he would have some peace.

    The shrill ring of the bell finally made itself heard, and the class dulled the noise to a comfortable level. His eyes lifted themselves from his book to wander around the room; more so for the purpose of trying to guess the peculiar expression a majority of the class was showing: Quiet anticipation? What was everybody getting so excited about?

    As the class became increasingly silent, the teacher leant against his desk in front, rolling a pen between his fingers in a carefree way. Soon, his voice was the only one expected to be heard.

    “My students,” he said with exaggerated dramatics, “We have, in our midst, a new student. He’s a foreign exchange student too, I believe. From Germany, I present to you, Deimos Todeskampt!” he moved his left hand out and away from his being, presenting the new addition to the classroom: Deimos Todeskampt.

    Kaiser looked up, right into the eyes of the boy, surprised by what he had seen. Staring back at him were such soulless, cold eyes. Deimos seemed to be captured in kaiser’s gaze, as he stood there for a long while before jerking his head away and breaking eye contact.

    He had such a brittle frame; almost as if he were to break into a million porcelain pieces. His milky pale skin accented this fragile look about him. His face was tragically beautiful, with those pouty, slightly parted lips. Beautiful, sepia-tinted hair curled around his ears and embraced his soft, sad face; almost as if they were trying to tickle his cheeks. The feature that Kaiser had become the fondest of was his eyes. They seemed sunken in; as if to hide from the light itself. Dark shadows encircled him, making him look as weak as his frame suggested. The expression he wore was a pitifully melancholy one, but it did not stick out from any other part of his body. This boy seemed, for the most part, a tortured soul; to Kaiser, he was nothing short of a beautiful work of god. That broken frame and beautifully cheerless expression reminded him of the sad faces of angels etched into the stained glass of sanctuary windows.

    “ My name is Deimos t-todeskampt…” he said, his voice as soft as the body who formed it, “ I come here from Germany, so please excuse my German accent, ja?” his Voice was laced with a heavy German accent, and smothered with pitiful embarrassment that completed the being before him so perfectly. With his head tilted down still, he glanced up at the class, looking past some loose strands of sepia curls. As he continued to talk, his fingers picked at one another frantically as a sign that he was nervous.

    Kaiser watched him intently. His every move pulling at the pit of his stomach, teasing kaiser’s every nerve one by one. At a point during his introduction, Deimos licked his lips, wetting them nervously. Kaiser mimicked the motion subconsciously.

    It was at this time that Kaiser had let his guard down, and his psyche loaded a gun, ready to cruelly pull the trigger at the slightest agitation.
    Deimos then turned his gaze to Kaiser once more, staring directly into his blue eyes. He continued with his speaking, smiling nervously in his direction. That gesture was just enough to set Kaisers already sensitive nerves on fire.
    The trigger went off in his mind. His body seized up, racked with an indescribable emotion that he had never experienced, and couldn’t explain for the life of him.

    The smoke cleared, the deafening ringing subsided, and the smell of gunpowder faded. That paralyzing emotion had ebbed away. Though, the temporary overhaul of emotion was complete, however, there was an enormous hole in his soul left behind. The only one who could now fill this hole was none other than Deimos.

    Kaiser had fallen in love with this boy. Those small, gentle hands; that slender, beautiful frame; those longing, pleading, grey eyes; his pale porcelain like skin; and his face… that distant, untouchable face that adorned such a lonely, beautifully pained expression. Kaiser had not only fallen in love with him, he obtained an obsession.

    “Kaiser, I’m volunteering you to tour him through the school; go on.” The teacher interrupted Kaiser’s inward worship of his god-child.

    “What?” Kaiser jumped, unaware that the teacher had addressed him.

    “You seemed so interested in our new student that I want you to tour a school with him. “He pointed to the door in a shooing motion, “Go on.”

    “Sure.” Kaiser said enthusiastically, escorting him out of the room. The walked down the hallways in silence. Kaiser wanted to hear that voice, so when deimos slowed to a halt in front of the door leading to the doctor’s office, which was lavishly decorated in Japanese trinkets and keepsakes, he took the chance to speak to him.

    “This is Dr. Howeru’s office.” A calm voice caught deimos’ attention, “He comes from Japan, and he’s very interested in his native rituals and cultural beliefs...” Deimos’ gaze turned form Kaiser, back to the door. Suddenly, the door opened, and the small boy yelped when he was face to face with a lanky man in a doctor’s coat.

    The Man did not seem old at all. In fact, he still had the hair of a teenager. Long and messy, tangled in braids and dreads that can only be remedied by cutting the hair off. The dark ebony made the man’s skin look paler, and his eyes were a dark grey not unlike deimos’ eyes.

    “Well hello there.” The Doctor said, “are you coming in to lie down?” deimos looked up at him, and then down in a shy manner.

    “N-no… I Was just looking at…your door.” He halted in his speech as he spoke, his voice as quiet as ever. It brought a chuckle out of the doctor on deimos’ behalf. This made deimos’ cheeks turn pink.

    “Nice isn’t it? I brought all this stuff from home.” He touched the door with his palm, and then looked down at deimos. “Well, I’m Madiri Howeru. If you come by my office after school, I can show you a lot more than the stuff on this door.” Deimos nodded, and watched him carry on. He looked up at Kaiser, smiling. Kaiser’s heart skipped a beat, admiring the student’s smile. They continued walking, now engaging in polite conversation.

    From that day forward, Kaiser did not go near deimos, but instead observed from afar. He was curious about everything concerning the European object of his desire. In the beginning, his curiosity was harmless. What did his laughter sound like? What foods does he prefer?

    It was only after a few months that his desire ate at him, twisting his doldrums and thoughts into something twisted and dark. What did his screams sound like? Did his bones snap as loud as everybody else’s? How pretty did his blood splatter? Did his sobs compose a song? These thoughts tempted him to rip that untouchable god-child from the gentle grasp of Gabriel and shove him into the cold hands of uriel, the gatekeeper of hell. He only needed the motivation.

    One day, when the snow fell uniformly on the school campus, Kaiser had the urge to watch deimos more extensively. He observed him after school, something he had not attempted to do before. He followed him as he put his books into his locker for the day, and tread off in a hurry. Kaiser caught sight of an anxious smile on deimos’ face.

    He continued to stalk him, viewing him sneaking into the doctor’s office.
    “What could he need in there?” Kaiser said quietly to himself. He walked up to the door and, with hesitation, quietly snuck into the infirmary. His footsteps stayed quiet as he made his way down the hallway leading to a door that closed Mr. Howeru’s office from the rest of the infirmary. The door was slightly open, and Kaiser looked in. his eyes widened, and a small, disgusted gasp escaped his lips.

    Dr. Madiri Howeru sat in his large office chair. Deimos straddled h is lap, receiving the doctor’s kisses, as the older male’s roaming hands elicited a small, submissive moan from deimos every time his fingers dipped into an article of clothing. Kaiser looked on as they continued to show each other carnal affection. Deimos let his head fall back as the older man sucked at the boy’s neck, leaving unsightly marks that would be a three-day reminder of their endeavors. Kaiser was shocked, not taking his eyes away even when howeru started stripping the boy of his clothes, continuing his kisses. Howeru captured the boy’s lips with his own, muffling his lover’s eager whimpers and pleasure filled moans when he began caressing the most private parts of him. Kaiser watched all the way through, from the most gentle of foreplay to the careless, passionate act itself. Kaiser’s heart throbbed in pain as he watched deimos stripped, naked being rock up and down rhythmically to the sound of carnal gasps and pleasurable groaning. His pain intensified with every hushed, whispered confession of love and every desperate, moaned plea for release. His heart then filled with a faint anger and seething upon hearing madiri’s name hastily repeated over and over until deimos let out a final cry of ecstasy, madiri following close behind. Kaiser eventually worked up the nerve to storm out quietly, overcome with an indescribable anger. How dare he violate something so utterly perfect? How dare he tempt his naïve, porcelain knick-knack with such sinful, disgusting methods of human-affection?

    Deimos was now nothing than a fallen angel to him, and the hole the angel carved out was emptier and more insatiable than ever before. Kaiser snapped; his body suddenly became relaxed, and a small chuckle escaped his lips.

    “I will satiate my curiosity.” He said to himself, “I will make sure that b*****d knows he’s destroyed something beautiful.” He waited for deimos to emerge form the infirmary.

    Deimos looked around cautiously, emerging from the doorway while buttoning his wrinkled blouse quickly. He covered the hickeys on his neck with the collar. The small boy felt a gentle hand on his shoulder. He gasped and looked up, seeing a madly-grinning Kaiser.

    “Yes?” he said softly, “You are needing me for something?” Kaiser would always appreciate how cute his broken English was.

    “I was wondering…” Kaiser smiled calmly down at him, “what do your screams sound like?”

    Deimos’ eyes widened, and he yelped as a blunt force collided with the back of his head. After that, deimos’ world went black.

    The next morning, Dr, Madiri Howeru pulled into the parking lot. He strained his eyes to see ahead of him. A section of the front lawn was closed off with police tape. Madiri, tempted by curiosity, got out of the car and walked toward the crime scene. He pushed through a crown of onlookers.
    The sight he saw made his heart stop.

    Deimos’ body was propped up against a tree, adorned in a beautiful red kimono. The kimono was tied loosely to let his fall from his shoulders and reveal a gaping hole in the middle of his body from his chest to his abdomen. The hole was forced open to show that some organs and insides here missing. His beautiful sepia hair had become soaked in sticky blood and clung to his face. His expression did not convey the terror he experienced in the last moments of his life; instead, it was one of mild surprise. His eyes told another story. One eye was ripped out, leaving only a blood-smothered eye socket, and one sad, grey eye that was frozen in the expression that he was pleading for somebody to help him. A few tear streaks were visible on his cheeks. His lips were partly open, completing a look befitting its victim. The body was positioned in a submissive seiza position: his legs rested under his knees, the back was straight against the tree behind him, collecting fallen snowflakes on his shoulders. his hands rested in his lap. In his cupped hands, he held his own heart, as it he were about to give it to someone he loved dear; as if it were a gift.


    Madiri, horrified and nauseous, stood there, shaking with both terror and the grief he felt for the student he had fallen in love with. He broke out into quiet sobs. He looked on more closely; realizing the blood on the white snow in front of him said something. In perfectly executed calligraphy, the blood read:
    “You loved him, right?”

    Madiri dropped down onto the snowy grass before deimos’ mutilated body, yelling out in terrible anguish.

    From afar, Kaiser watched on as the grief ridden doctor was escorted form the crime scene. With a satisfied sigh, he continued to class chuckling to himself.
    “His screams…” he quietly said in howeru’s Direction, “his screams were absolutely beautiful…” he Turned back to the direction he was walking, never to look back on that doctor, nor the boy who taught Kaiser just how human desire can make somebody act so Inhuman.