• CHAPTER 116 - DETERMINATIONS OF INFATUATION

    What would you do if you found out the child you were housing was the daughter of the man who murdered the person you're reincarnated from and bound your lover under a contract that will cause him to bring you to your demise? What would the truth be behind that child?

    "Arisa, Arisa, hold still," Kai informed me, becoming somewhat impatient.

    I pressed my head against his torso while we were both sitting on the bed, facing each other, "It hurts, Kai, it hurts!" I complained.

    So the dilemma with Mayura and Hitoshi was over--for the time being--and it was finally time to clean my wounds. Of course, the whole time Kai was cleaning my wounds he was also giving me probably the longest lecture I had ever received. He never said it directly, but every word that came out of his mouth ached to say "I told you so" relating to the whole "they won't hurt me" thing. Unfortunately, we had so happened to run out of peroxide so we had to dig out the alcoholic wipes. Kai had to damn near pin me down when he was cleaning my neck with it; it took about five to ten wipes on each side of my neck to clean up the blood and be sure the wound itself was infection-free. We were finally onto cleaning the wound on my head and the back of my head was throbbing.

    "Goddammit, I don't even think the injury from my gun hitting my head healed either," I frowned and inhaled sharply as Kai pressed a fresh alcoholic wipe on the back of my head.

    "Probably not," Kai agreed.

    After another minute or two, Kai was finally finished with cleaning my head wound and he tossed the bloody alcoholic wipes into the garbage can. He reached over for a washcloth soaked in cool water and he wrung it out. I had absolutely refused to remove my shirt again for him to clean the wounds; I couldn't care less if my shirt got wet or dirty; I didn't want him seeing my pathetic bra size again...not that I would ever want him to see under my shirt anyways.

    Kai pressed the washcloth over the gashes on my neck and he cleaned the wound slowly. It stung a little but the water was helping to calm the burn down a little. After a moment of cleaning my neck, Kai bit into his wrist to gather some blood in his mouth and he pulled me close to him by my waist and he pressed his lips against one side of my neck. His tongue gently glided over the gashes from Hitoshi's talons and the pain was numbing quickly. He gathered more of his blood in his mouth and repeated the same process with the bite marks on the other side of my neck. We both had agreed that he wouldn't do that with my head; I couldn't have any stray hair be caught in between his perfect teeth.

    "All better," Kai confirmed after cleaning my wounds again and covering them with light bandages.

    "Where's Ai?" was the first question out of my mouth.

    Kai's face fell grim, "She's still with Kira. She's petrified you'll possess a grudge against her now because of her father."

    My eyes widened and I felt the need to either cry or yell, "Bring her in here,"

    After a few seconds, the bedroom door opened slowly and Ai came into the bedroom. Kira trailed behind her with concern on his face. Ai was holding close to her the stuffed bear Kai had won for me at the carnival last month. She kept fondling with the embroidered heart on the bear's chest and small tears gathered at the edges of her large eyes.

    "Ai--"

    "I'm sorry, Nana!" Ai cried, allowing her tears to tower over her bottom eyelids. "N-Nana, I--!"

    "Ai..." I gently pressed my hand over her mouth and her tears continued. "Sweetie, come up here."

    I was staring to take on the role of Orihime at this new house; calling Ai "sweetie" and babying her around. Ai hesitantly climbed onto the bed and as soon as she sat in front of me--after Kai climbed off of the bed--she broke out another sob again and buried her face in my chest. I embraced her close to me for a long moment and allowed her to cry as much as she needed. It upset me that she kept apologizing; she had no control over what was happening so there was no use apologizing.

    "Ai, you need to understand that whatever has been happening isn't your fault," I whispered. "You're only a child; you probably didn't even know about half of the things Mayura said."

    She shook her head, "I didn't. Nana, I didn't know you had the special blood." she looked up at me and cried again. "I didn't know you had the blood."

    "You still shouldn't know," I pursed my lips and sighed. "I really wish you wouldn't have heard that."

    "What was Mayura saying about daddy making a contract?" the worry in her eyes increased.

    I glanced behind Ai at Kai, hoping he'd give me an answer as to if I could tell her what it was about. Would it be right to tell her, seeing as she was six and it was her father that caused it? Kai only leaned against the dresser with his hands in his pockets and apathy on his face. His complexion would always convert to either depression or apathy whenever the contract was mentioned.

    "Um...well...I don't really know much," I hesitated.

    "Your father has two completely loyal followers; Minoru and Kaiba, who are cousins." Kai butted in. "They have been following and serving Hisao for almost two centuries. Hisao had promised them immortality once the next girl would come around; in this case, Arisa.

    "Hisao also opted Minoru and Kaiba not waste their energy or effort to hunt down Arisa themselves. At the time Arisa's parents were murdered, I actually felt pity for her. Your father was angered and mocked me continuously and he berthed an idea to torment me and give Minoru and Kaiba what they want." Kai's face fell grim. "I'm the one who has to bring Arisa to Minoru and Kaiba. I'm the one guiding her to her death."

    Ai was silenced with panic and Kai continued, "Even back when they donned the contract, when I was just feeling pity for Arisa, I didn't want to do it. I've been trying everything to back out."

    Ai's tears started gathering again and she stared at Kai, "D-does that mean Nana is going to die?"

    I held Ai close to me again, not answering verbally. Ai comprehended and she sobbed loudly again. She clenched my shirt tightly and buried her face further into my chest. I wished Kai wouldn't have told her so abruptly; she was a six-year-old with a murderous father; she didn't need to hear anything else so disturbing.

    "Nana can't die!" Ai cried. "Nana can't die! Nana can't!"

    I stroked her hair and looked away from her; I couldn't look into her tear-flooded eyes. I glanced up at Kai, "We need to bring her to her father right away. Only you know where he is, Kai."

    He sighed, "Chances are that Mayura and Hitoshi would end up following. I can't bring any sort of death threat to either Hisao, Minoru, or Kaiba. I'm afraid we have to wait until Mayura and Hitoshi are gone." In other words, dead.

    My teeth clamped onto my bottom lip and I was almost regretting bringing up my next idea, "Maybe...maybe we should keep her at Matsuda and Orihime's until it's safe? Until we can bring her back to her father?" strangely, I wasn't really afraid of speaking about Ai's father, despite he was the one who enslaved Kai and I under the contract. I knew Hisao couldn't do anything to me; he already had immortality.

    Before anybody could answer, I climbed off of the bed and calmly made my way to the bathroom. The door shut behind me and I dropped onto the ground on me knees in front of the toilet. I hunched over the toilet and vomited. Shortly after my first vomit attack, I heard Kai's footsteps as he entered the bathroom after me. He lowered himself onto his knees behind me and tied my hair back, as he would always do when I was sick. However, that time, I wasn't vomiting from nausea; I was vomiting out of fear. It was rare; it only happened when I was scared beyond a doubt. After I vomited once again, I burst into tears and lowered my head.

    "Kai, I-I'm so scared," I sobbed. "I'm scared!"

    Kai leaned over and he kissed my flushed cheek and he held me close from behind, "Just take a deep breath, Arisa; don't overwork yourself."

    "I-I--" I was interrupted by more bile shooting out of my mouth and into the toilet. I could tell the vomiting was done for the time being and I flushed the toilet.

    Kai pulled me back from the toilet while we were still on the ground and he leaned against the wall. He leaned me back against his torso and constricted his sturdy arms around my waist. I continued to sob, allowing my fear to finally release itself. My arms wrapped around Kai's and I pressed my back against him harder, wanting him to hold me closer. He did as I wanted and his arms tightened around my midriff and he pressed his cool face against my sweating neck.

    "I'm so scared, I'm so scared..." I buried my face in my hands and continued my crying.

    "What is it you're afraid of?" Kai whispered into my ear.

    "Everything," I inhaled deeply. "I'm afraid for everybody's well-being, I'm afraid for Ai, I'm afraid of dying, I'm just...I'm afraid of everything!"

    The room fell silent, excluding my sobs that penetrated the silence. For the past two weeks that Ai had been with me, I never really showed my fear. I wanted to put a brave face on for everybody, especially Ai so she wouldn't feel insecure around me. But after finally finding out who I really was and who Ai's father truly was and what Mayura and Hitoshi did to all of us, I couldn't help but break down from the fear building up in me. I didn't want to die, I didn't want Kai to die, I didn't want Kira or Ai to die either. I wanted no killing going on; I wanted everything to go back to how it was.

    "You're okay, Arisa," Kai whispered again. "You've made it this far; don't back out."

    "I'm not backing out," I hissed, unintentionally being aggressive. "I'm just scared is all."

    "I have confidence in you," he kissed my ear. "I always have."

    "It's never going to end, is it?" I started clearing up my crying. "This brawl will go on forever."

    "If you grant me permission to kill them..." Kai's voice turned somewhat ominous, "it would be over sooner than you would assume."

    I shook my head, "No, don't kill them. Just find some way to drive them far away from here."

    In the silence that followed my words, I managed to calm myself down but my tears continued to slip every few seconds. I had never been so scared in so long; my stomach was still churning. It was pathetic that I ended up vomiting but Kai was right; there was almost nothing in the world that wouldn't make me nauseous, whether it be animate or inanimate or even a simple emotion. The fact I vomited from fear really wasn't a good sign.

    I turned my head and kissed Kai's cheek several times. I refused to allow him to kiss my lips since I had just gotten done vomiting. I was so infatuated with him; I never wanted to leave him. My gut churned more at the fact that Mayura was trying to kill me before anybody else at the moment. Why would she want to kill me just because I was protecting Ai? I wouldn't know; just because I was Mayura's reincarnation didn't mean I possessed the same thoughts as her. Grasping Kai's hands tightly that were still wrapped around my waist, I prepared my mental thoughts with the fact that my life with Kai could be ending sooner than expected. Anybody's life could end the next day.