When I finally awoke a throbbing on the back of my head in the occipital lobe was so prominent I just acted like I was still asleep. There was no way I was going to be able to focus with this horrible throbbing. It was like there was a giant silent drum inside of my head that was banging every two seconds, and the vibrations of it were reverberating off of my skull.
Finally after I tried to open my eyes, a blinding iridescent luminosity of a light bulb invaded seared to my head and caused the little man in my head to start beating that stupid drum again. I was sure that I had caused at least some type of small damage to my occipital lobe considering my eyes’ response to light. It was enough to drive me mad! I knew there had to be away to get over this. I knew I HAD to get over it otherwise I wasn’t going to have a clear mind. I pulled myself together and told myself I had to be more like Derek. Face the pain I was in.
I started to open my eyes and was greeted by his face. The man that had kidnapped me was standing right over me. I fought the repulsion in me and finally opened my eyes open all the way so he could know that I was awake. I thought about lifting my hand to see if I was bleeding from my head still, but I felt a weight on my wrist and ankles. I realized instantly he had chained my feet to the chair, and he chained my wrist to a chain that was linked to my ankles.
“They’re gone.” He said softly.
“Who are they?” I asked confused.
“It’s just me and you.” He said ignoring my question.
“Who are you?” I asked as my voice cracked. I just decided to leave it alone. I wanted to know which personality he was in right now.
He stood tall and said proudly, “I’m Raphael.”
Suddenly as my senses came back to me I smelt possibly one of the most repugnant smells known to man. I was sure it was worse than when my next door neighbor Mr. Mendenhall removes his shoes and undergarments then releases his bowels after a long hot night on the Vindaloo (which is an Indian curry dish that causes gas) and Tiger Lager, and that’s saying something. “What is that smell?” I asked trying not to look repulsed.
“I’m burning fish hearts and livers; keeps away the devil. I believe you can see into men’s minds.”
I barely shook my head and decided not to do that again as I said, “That’s not true. I study human behavior.”
As I said that he took a gun out of his pocket and then he said, “Shh, I’m not interested in the arguments of men.” He pulled out a bullet and asked, “Do you know what this is?”, and without even letting me answer he said, “It’s gods will.” He put the bullet in the cylinder, spun the cylinder, and then closed it. He then pointed the gun at my head.
My mind raced for something intelligent to say to him. I wanted something to rationalize with this personality. “You don’t have to do this.” I stated fearful.
“I’m just doing this in the name of god.” He pulled the trigger and shot at me.
Okay I know I’m ruining the moment here, yes you’re in suspense but… I have to point something out. I didn’t see my life flash past my eyes, I didn’t see a bright light, and I didn’t get all of that other stuff people say they do. I got nothing but a jolt of fear running up my spine as the sound of the gun firing echoed in the tiny room.
I was so happy to find that I was alive. I had survived my first game of Russian roulette. It was a blank.
He smiled and put the gun away. “I’ll see you tomorrow. You might just be useful.” He said walking away.
I sat there trying to collect my thoughts. There was no way I was going to live if I didn’t have SOME way to communicate with my team. He was going to kill me. Some way, somehow he was going to find my sins. The funny in a good way thing was I didn’t have that many sins. I hadn’t killed anyone, I hadn’t worshipped another God in fact I was sure I was agnostic even though I grew up in a Christian home, I didn’t think I had an idol, I never said anything about God so I couldn’t have said his name in vain, honestly I wasn’t going to go through all of the commandments, but I was sure I was almost sinless. So I knew I had to make sure that if I did remember what sin I had committed that I didn’t tell him…well not until I knew the time was right.
I laid my head back to try to sleep. I was sure I was going to do well. If I had woken up from the blow to my head I was sure I could sleep again. So slept I did.
The next morning I awoke to the light streaming through a window. I knew there was no way anyone was going to hear me. We were in the middle of no where. If someone was close they were deaf, because if they weren’t they would have heard the sound of the revolver going off.
I was extremely hungry… and I really wanted some coffee. I mean I didn’t care if it was terrible all I wanted was coffee. I had gone so many days in my life with coffee it was a weird feeling to not have the warm liquid course through my arteries and carry the sugary highly caffeinated substance to every cell in my body and rejuvenate my mind back to it’s normal functioning. I sighed to myself as I realized that for a long time I was going to have to deal.
I reached up to my head and bent my head so I could touch the spot where he had hit me. I pulled back my hand and found it wet. I wiped it on my pants hoping he would think I hadn’t done anything. I had to convince all of his personalities that I was a wonderful person, and that I hadn’t deserved all of this.
I was in the middle of thinking about that when he kicked the door open. He had a pile of wood in his arms, and he was wearing the same coat. I sighed to myself as I realized how much I hated that stupid thing. I had no idea what he had in there. So I had no idea what to embrace myself for next.
When he realized I was looking at him he said, “What are you staring at boy?” He walked to the fireplace and started to put wood in.
“You’re not Raphael.” I pointed out. I knew that Raphael had a different demeanor. He was… held higher. He was more snobby looking as if he was better than everyone. This person held themselves up… like a bully would.
“Do I look like Raphael?” He asked ironically. I’m sure he didn’t realize it, but he did in fact look like Raphael. He looked entirely like Raphael. In fact I knew for a fact the body that personality was in was the same body Raphael was in. He started to poke at the liver and heart concoction and I thought about a way to try to befriend him.
“Thank you for burning those… keeping us safe.” I said kindly or so I thought.
“Don’t try to trick me.” He growled at me.
“I would never try to trick you.” I mean I wasn’t trying to trick him. I was in fact trying to just be nice.
“You’re a liar.”
“I’m not a liar.”
Suddenly he ripped his coat open and started to walk to something. Unfortunately I had no idea what he was going to. “Lying is a sin.”
“I’m not a liar.” I repeated trying to figure out what was coming next. I had angered him. That was a known fact by now thanks to the way he had looked at me with fiery eyes.
He sat on a cot in front of my chair and grabbed my foot. “This will be over quickly if you just confess your sins.”
“I’m not a sinner.” I insisted. I knew by then I really was lying. I knew somehow I had sinned, at least according to the bible I had. Everyone does.
He took off my shoe to show my black and white striped sock. “We’re all sinners.” He took off the other shoe to show my gold with black bats on it sock. Yes I wore mismatched socks. It was bad luck to wear matching socks. It was terribly bad luck.
“And the lord spake unto Moses saying speak unto all the congregation of the children of the lord and say unto them ‘ye shall be holy for I, the lord your god, are holy.” I quoted Leviticus 19:2. Yes I knew the bible. I thought it would be important to know it if a case like this ever happened. I mean I had heard of religious terrorist, so I informed myself in the bible so I could know if the terrorist was bluffing. I had no idea that this would actually come into context.
“You know Leviticus?” He asked looking at my shocked.
I rejoiced silently inside. I had impressed him in some fashion; I had proven that I wasn’t like the rest of his victims. I had made him think that I was an in depth Christian like him. I had made him think we had some type of connection. “Every word of the bible. I can recite it for you.” I assured.
“The devil knows how to read too.” He pointed out.
“I’m not a devil, I’m not a devil.” I started to babble in fear. “I’m a man, my name is Spencer Reid,” He took off my gold sock. “and I have a mother and a father just like you. And they taught me the bible. Just let me recite the bible.” I practically begged.
“It’s time to confess Spencer Reid!” He then took the log he had been poking the fish entrails with and struck the bottom of my foot with this.
See what you may not realize is: the soles of your feet contain more sweat glands and sensory nerve endings per square centimeter than any other part of the body. So, after pointing that out, having a piece of wood slammed against the bottom of your foot hurts!! So I couldn’t contain the yelp that slipped from my lips.
“Confess!!”
“I don’t have anything to confess.” I was determined not to let him win this.
He struck it again and I cried out.
“Confess Spencer Reid!!” He yelled.
Again I insisted on my first answer, and again he slammed the wood into my foot. After a while he got annoyed by that and walked off for what ever reason.
I was left there to sit there as my foot screamed in pain. I admit tears did trickle down my face. I’m not one to hold in my pain like Derek did. I had to eventually get it out, and I decided while I was alone I would get my pain out without anyone else noticing.
That entire day I sat there wondering what my future was to be. Would he cut me? Would he stab me? Little did I know in the long term effects the total of pain I would face what he would do would be a hundred times worse.
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As much as I wish Spencer Reid and this plot line was mine... it is in fact... not mine. It belongs to Criminal Minds. Lucky people.
oO- Alice Whitlock-Oo Community Member 
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