Meirenna Prayer

• Artist: Sailor_Neptune_Michiru16
• Description: This poem is part of a story on how a special girl saved her kingdom. I hope you enjoy it!!! Somethings you may not understand, so my story will make it all clear. Thank you!
• Date: 01/03/2009
• Tags: meirenna prayer

Once back then, the sun shined freely,
Nothing was, as cold or steely.
Laughter drew happiness 'round
To everyting from flora to hounds.

The queen brought joy, and naught evil,
Life and death battle and win.
Life flows on, never ceasing,
Till that fatefull day.

Darkness blew, 'round and 'round,
Up and down from sight till it found,
The kingdom resting with such joy,
And sucked away the jewel Zoroy.

And to this day we wish for still,
For joy and life to revive.
Our lives will then, be relit,
And our kingdom shall come back.

For need to find this rainbow hue,
In a time the glow is due,
To save the kingdom from life and death,
She'll battle all, till life's last breath.

So when the kingdom does redo,
And life and joy arrive,
We'll all wait faithfully,
And battle while we strive.

For life and joy never cease,
Their hope is still alive.
We'll never live with this curse,
For battle will revive.

And when that faith-filled maiden shows,
The kingdom will reglow.
So till that day our hope will light,
Our eternal soul inside.

Comments

[Sailor_Neptune_Michiru16]

Rate by my age:10 and average level for that age. Thanks!!!

[Katara daughter of Water]

Naked Jack sums up much of my opinion. It is repetitive saying the same ideas in just a different form. I speak of stanzas 4, 7, 8, and 9. The rhyming scheme and who is talking ('our' rather than 'their' hope is still alive) also should be consistent. There is one stanza that doesn't rhyme at all.The imagery and the rhyming itself is good though and I like that it is poem narrating an story. It reminds me of the poems sung by minstrals.

[Kai Merah]

Nice poem. Pretty imagery but just a little repetitive.

[Lisa Brampton]

pretty piem pooem and thanks for voting

[Merriara]

I really like your writing--and that you're just 10 is amazing. I agree with NakedJack. using a thesaurus would make it even better..and it is a little repetitive, but it's great. ((says the person who cannot rhyme to save her life stare ))

[Sailor_Neptune_Michiru16]

Thanks everybody! You truly make my hopes soar!!!

[thatgurlcaresnot]

I really enjoyed your poem. Wish you luck for the best!!! Its fantastic!!!!!!!!(these exclamations are meant to go on forever!) This is coming from a great author "I know you'll be able to reach your goal!" WE all have fate in you!!!!!!!